Fucking Yamaha, I knew it!
What else would The Wing wanna do on a Wednesday, but ride a bull and be a cowboy. Oh, and of course shout out to the man, the myth, the ledge Chad Reed…who’s currently in 3rd place overall, just ahead of TotoMotoPoto and Dungey. Of course its gotta be due to his sabotage tactics, reminiscent of the Cold War or any 80’s movie. He better have that shit handy if he ever faces Spider Man at next year’s A-1, that dudes got skills. Death! Death! Die! got skills too, and laid down a fresh track last night, didn’t get to hear it yet, but were all wet with anticipation! Of course the real task was reading Shoebox’s graffiti lyric sheet. That reminds me, FUCK Revolver Magazine, and the Dallas Cowboys while were at it! Just please never trust an awards show, or a Canadian who lives in -41 degree weather, again! That goes for Beyonce too, stupid Milli Vanilli acting bitch. Also, don’t trust anyone who owns an automatic weapon, but isn’t cool with them being banned or controlled, or some sketchy shit like that. More gun talk, and some video of a dude who says kids won’t be allowed to own turtles if we ban assault rifles, but I couldn’t find it and it wasn’t that riveting.
Happy BDay Tully’s Mom!
Hollywood News is always riveting, and so is Johnny Deep’s ex girl friend, who’s fucking some new chic, yup! Arnold is more interested in fucking his old chic, lizard lips. Speaking of Arnold, turns out Rawdog saw The Last Stand recently, and said it was damn good despite his gut going into the movie, and that it was only like 10th ranked after its opening weekend in box office sales. What was #1? Your Mama, seriously it was. Of course none of those are a match for The Jew Box. Ellis gave us a in depth recap of this masterpiece, starring Matisyahu, and whoever else is in the fucking movie. Sounded good to me, especially the ‘Jew Buzzer’ scene, so be sure to get it up ya! Do you know the difference between a Jew and a canoe? Snoop Lion doesn’t know the first thing about being a Rasta, or so says Bunny Wailer. Lindsay Lohan doesn’t know the first thing about a lot of things, plus she ain’t selling out either. Adele isn’t selling out her kid or his name, shes just too stupid to pull it off is all. Shia LaBeouf ain’t selling or sharing any of the shit he scored on the set of his next movie. And last but certainly not least, please don’t follow @jew_box on twitter, dude called the show and its pretty fucking creepy.
A.K.A. EllisMate beating that pussy up yo!
Check this muthafucker here out, naked on a roof, jumps off roof, breaks into home, jerks it on rug, shits on sidewalk, rubs himself over kids clothes n shit, oh and it took place in Florida! Jim Florentine took his place in Florida, after being 18 and laid only twice, he nailed a smoking hot chic first day in Florida. He stayed for 2 years! So what’s Jim been up to these days, who the fuck knows as he and Tully just spent the next hour comparing Ellismate’s sexual adventures lately, to hall of fame baseball careers such as Ted Williams, Randy “Big Unit” Johnson, and of course knuckleballer R.A. Dickey (Who has a long way to go to the HOF – just saying). From 3-2 counts to inside-the-park home runs, Florentine and Tully fucking lost me on this one, but hilarious none the less. Apparently Jim’s also big into asking his buddies for advice on the best moves to put on their ex hook ups. Hey man, if you know a trick she loves, hook me up with that info homie. And if you know a chic who’s cool with you shitting out a nugget, while having sex, I don’t fucking believe you for one second! Of course Jim wasn’t here to talk about that, though you could have fooled me, instead he will take part in the Roast of Dee Snider, tomorrow night at 9pm ET on AXS.tv. But enough about Jim, whats Ellis been up to? How about shoving 18 gauge needles in his ass and getting fake Canadian birth certificates, Red Dragons to you my friend.
Find out on TJES!
We found out Rawdog ain’t alone in his love of large areolas. One Jim Florentine gave our furry friend the nod of approval when hearing the news. Does that mean Robin Quivers has huge nip nips? One can only dream….about this nasty bitch from Boston, who beats her man for fa’ting in the bed, the nod, while singing her smash hit with Ellismate, “Ha’d to Fa’t” – which was lame, but no where near as creepy as WesleyPipes-tallica. Dick dog just wasn’t made for that riff, but the Ellis show is made for Jew jokes, needle talk, areolas and of course, shitting out nuggets while fucking some broad….or selling a BMW too, that’s kinda gnarly. Jew Joke: This kid asks his dad for fifty bucks, so the Jewish dad says “Forty bucks, what do you need Thirty bucks for?” If that didn’t sell you on listening tomorrow On Demand, then how about inverted nipples, hairy nipples, and of course skittles popping out of nipples. No, then its gotta be the baseball/Ellis sex life that has you intrigued. For me, I personally am a huge fan of the Jew jokes, including my favorite joke about your mom…..she’s a Jew…..a ‘Load Jew’, OH!
So what do you boys think of these? Not too shabby “Blair”, those are very intercourseable. Well, you fuckers have complained too long, heres your wish if you’ve been missing the classic segment, “Dude, Am I A Slut?” Here we go; Josie is 20, with 34DD tits, and was pissed some dude pulled out and came on her back….Not a slut Josie, just a bitch. Erica has been dating a dude for 4 years, engaged for 2, and they haven’t had sex yet with “Turd McStiffenson” being all Catholic and shit….not a slut, in fact what the fuck did you call for? Tonya, 27 years ancient, found out her ex cheated on her so went and fucked all his boys and his female cousin too….not a slut, yup thats the verdict! Lisa is 36 and her man is hung like horse, and she chows beav, and had sex at the pool with some chic in public….not a slut. Thats 0 for 4 if your scoring at home, of course not with any of these bitches…so how about Jackie, she and her girl friends took turns fucking some random dudes at different places throughout a roughly 5 hour window…..DING! Not only do we have our first slut, but that bitch is invited to the prize chamber at The Wing’s house, ‘cept he hung up on her slutty ass. In the search for Jackie to call back, we played ‘Are you a lady, rapist or sex offender’ which I’m sure is hear to stay. All in all it is what it is, nah mean!
Ever hear the expression “ain’t got a pot to piss in”, well these mother fuckers here done 
