Show re-cap for Thursday, 9/19/2013

Welcome to Dogcenter with Rawdog and Tully, you are not that important because you are covered in shit. Ha. Ellis isn’t there because he was involved in a fender bender in his truck, but he’s okay, and he’s on his way to kick Josh out of his chair as soon as possible.

While we’re waiting, let’s have a discussion about religion and shit. It’s not the devil in the details, ladies and gentlemen, it’s the shit. Rawdog’s mom would prefer that he would give her Jewish grandchildren since he is religiously a lost cause but he still enjoys Latkas. Tully pipes in a few times about how he would rather have Thanksgiving…but…the last time that I checked being Jewish doesn’t make you un-American and therefore Thanksgiving is still around. But, whatevs, because allllll religions are one big joke and they are based on silly rules that a bunch of people made up a thousand years ago that barely make any sense. Except for that whole thing about not staying in the same house as a woman who is menstruating…that is just good old fashioned common sense made legitimate by saying it was passed down from God.

Holy Water is dirty. Like, really dirty. Not all that surprising considering that human beings are walking shit infested poop factories who won’t join in the fight to not be so disgusting by attempting to wash their hands competently. Yes, there is good bacteria that helps keep different things in and out of our bodies, but that’s an argument against bathing in Purell every 6 seconds- not a reason to forgo soap in the bathroom. Everybody poops, it’s a fact. There are books about it that we give to children and it’s something I personally painstakingly had to tell my stepson recently during potty training because he was deathly afraid of pooping for some reason. Everybody poops and then a staggering 80-90% of humanity then doesn’t wash their hands properly. And then we touch our faces every 7 seconds. I am so glad that OCD keeps me diligently burning the skin off of my hands while I scrub and I am practiced at not touching my face. Though it doesn’t really matter since the rest of the population doesn’t share my neurosis. Tully is rather enjoying his new-found awareness of increased face touching because his scruff is delightful.

So maybe we should work on a shit vaccine- what doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger. Sprinkled in with this was talk of genetically modified foods, the goods and the bads of science interfering in nature, and we’re all taking antibiotics unwittingly because it’s in the meat we eat (yay bacon, boooo vegans). Also, Alter Boys Behaving Badly and stealing sacramental wine (or sacramental to be because no one is ballsy enough to steal Jesus’ blood) and vying for funeral positions so they can make 3 to 5 bucks- which is like 7 bucks in today’s currency.

Ellis arrives and regales listeners with the tale of his accident. Apparently traffic lights in LA go out all of the time and they put up dinky little stop signs that can’t be seen from larger vehicles. This resulted in a girl driving into the back of Ellis’ truck while he was en route to the skate park in Venice Beach with Katie and Tiger. But it’s all good, cause Ellis is in a good mood, no one got hurt, and everything is going to be okay because there is a Chronic Colonic on the way. He did, however, have to call AAA to tow him because his stock tires are under lugnut lock and key and the dealer never gave him a key. Bastards in Vegas just want all the keys to themselves. Ellis talks about how he wants to do more Daddy things, and he saw the Metallica Movie last night. Which was weird. The movie part. The concert footage was amaaaaazing. It’s the best ticket to see them that you could ever buy because the cameramen are so close you are right up James Hetfield’s ass. In. 3. D. Gabe Ruediger asked Ellis if he was okay, which is ironic as in a few weeks at Ellismania 9, they will be trying to kill each other in the ring. Unfortunately it seems there won’t be a newleywed fight, because I am too chicken to call into the show.

With Hollywood news comes news of famous people doing drugs, like Zac Efron partying it up his nose with Charlie Sheen (who calls bullshit and says it only happened once) because he’s sad his parents are trying to make sure he doesn’t completely fuck up his life and because he will always be ‘that kid from High School Musical’. Nick Carter is blaming his former party problem on Paris Hilton, and says he has permanent brain damage from too much Ecstacy, but I don’t know if anyone would really ever notice that. Jack Nicholson also admits to doing drugs since the 60s and I believe that no one is surprised about this (except for that whole castration fantasy thing…yikes). A lady in the Hamptons woke up in the middle of the night to find Alicia Keys partying in her kitchen, which is fine since apparently Alicia Keys is way cool and I should head to the Hamptons and try to chill with her. The Expendables 3 will see back most of our favorites from the prior 2 movies, has added some new blood, and is in talks with Frasier for a role. Yes, Frasier aka Kelsey Grammer, may be an Expendable. Patrick Dempsey is a race car driver, who really sucks at race car driving, but if that’s his bliss then be happy you were Dr. McDreamy and you have the money to pay for your hobby. And Kanye West…where did you even come up with the idea of needing a carpet in your dressing room ironed? Really?!?!?!?!? Do carpets get wrinkly? Or do you like to take off your shoes and have warm toes? Please get over yourself for fuck’s sake.

This weekend Ellis is going to be back in New York to see the Metallica Show at the Apollo. He’s coming with Katie and it’s their anniversary weekend (aw) but feel free to approach him if you’re a fan of the show because he’s down to hang and will probably not punch you and you have up to 4 chances to take a decent picture with him. After Ellismania he will be touching down in Panama to the sounds of Panama, no matter how much he has to fight with the stewardess and the locals about it. It sounds like a nifty vacation and hopefully he will be celebrating an Ellismania win due to his hard training and not due to him having a thicker face than Gabe.

We have an exciting guest today!!!!! Or not. It’s just Will. He’s back from following Pink Floyd around and it’s time to play ‘let’s fix the phones on the air because that’s the only time we can do it’. It’s a fun game. Meanwhile The Fucking Animal Will Pendarvis Butt Judge tells us how he doesn’t want to go backstage- he wants to be in the moment and truly enjoy seeing flying pigs and planes crashing into the stage without seeing how it works. There will always be something to complain about on the show, despite everything being in the process of getting fixed, because one day…one day there will not be marshmallows for the lattes. It’s a damn hard cruel world that they are operating in, overlooking the Hills of Beverly in mood lighting with liberty and James Hetfield for all.

And then, an actual guest, even if only for a moment. And I missed his name like 8 times in a row…so insert that guy’s name here. He is the real and true King of the West on the radio and is going to be getting in the SiriusXM game. He is the ruler of the LA based on bumper stickers alone, a self-made man former illegal immigrant who wears t-shirts once and then throws them away (or maybe donates them…he seems like a good guy…he can donate them) and hosts a Spanish Speaking radio show that is a big deal. Bigger than Stern, bigger than Ellis, but in Spanish- so it’s cool. Ellis, Tully, and Rawdog are all excited to meet him and are looking forward to working together and becoming buds.

Speaking of bud…ohhhhhhh segue skills…they’re wrapping up the show practicing techniques for the Chronic Colonic which will be taking place tomorrow. Rawdog is on the chopping block to be the lucky man who gets to reverse feltch Kevin Craft, and watch out for the rage if he gets weed smoke farted in his face. Because that’s his trigger, Tully need not wonder or search. Tully will be shopping for supplies because they decided that, along with the baster, they are going to need some tubing. Tully has probably already been to Walgreens for the $13.99 douche enema water bottle kit and balloon that will be the solution to any problem they have thought of. And duct tape. Duct tape can do anything.

Things we learned:

Rawdog is going to be releasing a solo album which he is playing coy about until after the new release from Death!Death!Die!

Shit is the key to the holiness of all religion and the winner is…Indian Hinduism and the Ganges

Rawdog and Tully cannot work the phones

When you’re 70, you’ll be having the same conversations you had at 50 and you won’t know it, and you won’t remember this either, so you’ll be fine about it

SiriusXM wants to be more involved in Ellismania because…FUCK YEAH!!!!

Fleetwood Mac is the greatest live performing band of all time

Homework sucks

Alcohol withdrawal will kill you…most other drugs are only as dangerous as their paraphernalia (in the long term…don’t do drugs…drugs are bad)

Randy Coutoure is an actor

Australian Hooligans wear pink sunglasses with pink tank tops and will kick your ass if you make fun of them at Cricket Matches (aka Everybody Let’s Get Wrecked Matches)

The girls at Cosmo should probably consider not masturbating in public while eating Gyros

The Egyptians make really good cotton

You can get Ellis to pee on a custom made $20,000 vagina couch for the extra low price of $4,000

 

Show Re-cap for Friday 9/6/2013

There has been a question that has plagued scientists for decades, when Bruce Banner turned into The Incredible Hulk, why didn’t his pants rip? Did his waist not get bigger? Did the gamma roids have an incredible shrinking effect on his junk causing his intense anger? Either way it is safe to say that the show is the hulk, mild mannered until you piss it off then it turns big and green and breaks shit and then has to move to a new place while sad music plays. And a new place is exactly where the guys are going, today is the last broadcast they are doing from The Swinghouse. Ellis is very excited because the new studio will have underground parking so the Porsche won’t be getting dirty anymore. It will also have elevators, a cafe, a McDonald’s within walking distance for those emergency McNugget cravings, and a mother fuckin couch! Not only are the guys moving studios, home_main_shad4Juder McDuder is moving to the new building too! He isn’t as excited to move to the new studio in Hollywood because he thinks Hollywood is to uppity and his show is directed to alien believers and cousin fuckers. Jude likes all the perks of the new studio, he just doesn’t like the 10 mile commute. But on the bright side, no more toilet by the fridge. Oh and the new studio will have a sting pong table. Rawdog started carrying on about his chachkis and how much he loves them like an old lady at bingo. After he tried to argue with Ellis about some scarab beetle, his bell, and a little Lego koala, they somehow started talking about Mel Gibson and how he’s a dick but not a dick and some shit. Wanna know what Satan would sound like if he was in a quartet? Lamar Odom is reported to be doing 800 worth of drugs a day. He’s freebasing coke and taking ambient and still kicking ass on the court. All of this information is courtesy of his drug dealer, which goes to show that you just can’t trust drug dealers anymore.

Rawdog might have sold his car to a stranger who left him a note saying he wants to buy it as soon as possible. Sounds legit, except there wasn’t a For Sale sign on his car but I’m sure it’s totally legit and this dude won’t try to burn Josh, literally or figuratively. A dude sent

I want to buy your car. Lets have lunch an go over it.

I want to buy your car. Lets have lunch an go over it.

in a video saying he wants to donate his car to the guys to blow up and make music video’s with and so Josh can ghost ride the whip (video). Want to see yer mums wedding video? A Detroit woman tried to by monkey from Camaroon, she paid $350 mostly in monkey tax and never got her money and tried to get the police to help but they just laughed and laughed and laughed. Some nasty lady has the worlds longest dreads, and is nasty. Seattle woman broke into the Dim Sum King and told everybody there to go back to China and flung soy sauce all over the place. English woman had a stroke and now speaks with a Chinese accent. Here’s a video of yer mum again, on her honeymoon. And in more Women Am I Right news, a Chinese girl bot in trouble for breast feeding while driving a scooter, a woman sues General Mills because crunch berries aren’t real, and another woman sues Winnebago because the cruise control implied that it was an autopilot and she crashed.

Wesley Willis is a mother fuckin musical genius! Tiger has been skateboarding for one day and is already better than me. He’s bombing the driveway, doing side grabs, nose grabs, nose and tail grabs at the same time! “The kids a natural” said Tony Hawk and when asked about Tiger Lee Ellis, Kid Rock said, “That kid is kickin more ass than a one legged ass kicker, Kid Rock!” Ellismania may or may not be sold out, Ellis is 99% sure that it isn’t but that means only one thing, there is a 1% chance that if you didn’t get your ticket yet, you’re fucked. Here’s another delightful song from Wesley Willis. Enjoy.

photo (8)

An English dudes daughter walked home after he dropped off at daycare, and all the daycare place had to say was pretty much, shit happens. In Aussie News, they played a video of Kevin Rudd, Prime Minister of Ausrailia, answer and dominate a gay marriage question from a pastor. There was also news of Saints player named Clinton Jones who set fire to a dwarf in a bar. Its funny, not because they lit the little guy on fire, but because they lit the little guy on fire. Ellis’s “agent” said he’s “in” next year on “dancing” with the “stars,” that should be interesting. In Hollywood News, jack Nicholas is old as fuck and can’t remember shit. Clint Eastwood got himself the D ticket on the Hump Bus to Pound Town. Bieber has come out of the closet and said how much he loves sucking man dicks. J-Lo got three million for singing to some evil Turkmen dude, in my opinion he overpaid. Vin Diesel’s life has been a constant barrage of aliens complicated by being legally blind. People paid 150 bucks to meet and get an autograph from Courtney Kardashian but nobody was available to kill them. Then they ended the final day in The Swinghouse by arguing and comparing the intelligence of the fans that pay to meet Courtney Kardashian or Dave Mustaine. If you ask me they’re all idiots. Today’s recap will be ended with another lyrically majestic tune from Wesley Willis that I dedicate to yer mum, OH!

Show Re-Cap for Friday 5/17/2013

Welcome to the Pre-Vacation Recap of The Pre-Vacation Jason Ellis Show. The guys will be gone for the next two weeks on vacation, and like any good listener you’re wondering, what are the guys going to be doing while gone? Well it’s a good thing I’m here to tell you. Ellis is going to be training and eat healthy and rolling around with sweaty, hairy men and photo (1)getting a tan as he trains jiu jitsu. Rawdog is going to just roll on the pussy train making all the stops in Tuna Town, Smash City, and Beavertropolis. Tully will be reading Children’s books, because he is super dad and that’s what super dad does. After vacation they thought it would be really awesome to do a show sitting in the ocean, that is until one of the intern tards dropped the cord killing everybody. Josh revealed that he is also going to a vampire porn movie premier at a club so he can finally put all those games of Dance Dance Revolution to use. Tully broke the law to check out massive boobies, rightly so, those things are ridiculous! Thank you sir for your contributions to society. Would you cut your balls off to win the lottery? For hundreds of millions of dollars are you willing to have just a shaft and a massive taint? I would, and I would show everybody my million dollar nut sack scar as I laugh and drive away in my Lamborghini. Ellis thinks he can fight a bear with a shield and sword and win, I’m not touching this topic. Are you a fat piece of shit and want to know the Jason Ellis Secrets To Weight Loss? Burn more calories than you eat, don’t eat junk food, and don’t eat after eight at night. That’s right fattys, it’s that simple.

Toronto Mayor Rob Ford was caught on tape smoking crack and talking shit and the video is up for sale. The dude that owns it wants to get paid six figures for it, but that’s Canadian money so it’s probably like $3.50 American and a cheeseburger. Speaking of food, the Chronic Taco guys showed up with delicious morsels of assorted animal meats and spices. They shot the shit and talked a bunch about Weeman, Weematt, Josh Hanson, and fucking on every surface in their restaurants. Okay, maybe not EVERY surface, but if you find a hair in your taco…

In Aussie News a man on a stroll got attacked by a startled kangaroo, an Australian Minister Of Education clicked “like” on a Facebook photo of a kid not knowing the kid was3ow8ea playing sneaky nuts. Ellis challenged Dom to a reading sing off duel while wearing cockroaches. Dom screamed like a little girl when the woman, that’s right a woman, put them on him. This incredibly entertaining bit of torture was brought to you by Reptile Outpost, always supplying TJES with creepy crawly bitey things. Sweet Wheels (@SweetWheelsLa) brought in some treats for the guys and the girls told them about being i a desert truck and the tough times of being a mobile restaurant chef and owner. After stuffing their faces the guys took a few phone calls giving relationship advice. Here is a summary of their replies: tell your chick tough shit and be happy you have a roof and food, if she’s getting wasted all the time get her help or leave, if she’s got another dude leave her alone until she doesn’t, the best way to get over a chick is to get under another one, don’t date your besties ex unless its been over 10 years and you have written permission and he’s dead. Then there were a bunch more calls for different advice but I didn’t write them all down because its Friday and I don’t give a fuck.

And now Hollywood News. I’m gonna level with you folks, I couldn’t give a shit what happens in Hollywood, with celebrities, or in the news. I would be incredibly happy if they cut this bit down to twice a week. I don’t know what you think but you don’t write the recap

Space poop, that shit's everywhere!

Space poop, that shit’s everywhere!

so neener neener neener. Now back to your regularly scheduled shenanigans. There is MMA this weekend but not for Nate Diez because he tweeted the F word, not that F word, the other F word and got a fine and suspended. In poop news scientists might have to spear shit on the space ship that is going to Mars. And some Canadian car smashin hackey player called in showing us just how frequent those guys get concussions and other mind limiting head injuries. That also reminds me, yer mum better get HumanShittingCream.com quick before someone else grabs it. Everybody knows that nobody can hold more cream in her ass than yer mum, OH!

Show Re-Cap for Friday 5/10/2013

Welcome to the end of the beginning, Ellis will be assassinated tonight but will resurrect to do a special edition dead man walking episode on Sunday, so be sure to tune in. Ellis went phototo the doctor for a checkup and the doc said he’s good in the hood yo! Do you remember the show when they talked about that one stuff that’s supposed to be awesome? Well if you don’t then I’m not going to tell you about the deer antler spray that came in today. Ladies and deer beware! Ellis went to Snooks school with Andrea for an arts and crafts show and had to guess which painting was her’s but then she told them later that it wasn’t hers and then a little while later she revealed that it was really hers. Apparently a bunch of people don’t like hearing Dom get shocked but Rawdog’s mom likes so everyone else can fuck right off. In political economics we learned that everyone needs a little communism. If you disagree please send your comments to JRichmond@siriusxm.com. They talked about the O&A show and the different shenanigans that they are up to and it sounds funny so check it out. Or don’t, see if I fucking care. This brought up the subject of show structure and if its good or bad. It was determined that a completely structured show is stressful and a pain in the ass but a show that is just off the cuff has a lot of room for nothing and could be bad. The way it is now with a little of both seems to be best in my own opinion. Josh’s high school reunion is this weekend and when this was brought up before the guys said he should bring a porn start with him. Imagine this, he’s dating a fucking porn star now! Problem solved, now he just needs to put “Titty Fucker” on his name sticker.

This Sunday is Mother’s Day, a holiday invented by Anna Jarvis to celebrate her moms life  but it got all fucked up by card companies and greedy florists, so after spending half her bad-mothers-day-cards-1life trying to create it, she spent the other half trying to get rid of it. So when you buy your mom flowers and cards just remember, you killed Anna Jarvis. This little story capped off the Women Dumbasses, Am I Right? segment. A woman wrote to advice column asking if her dumb mother-in-law can make her child dumb by being around her. A man was speeding, and when pulled over there was nobody driving, while the police searched the area, the car took off. They pulled it over again, searched the area again, and the car took off again. The third time they finally found the dude hiding in the trunk. Congratulation dude for being the sweetest dude this week and congrats to the cops for being the dumbasses of the week. A Michigan woman stalked herself by creating a fake Facebook profile of her ex. Two buddies from prison had threesome and one dude stabbed the other dude because he wanted to get some of that sweet sweet tang. A 14 year old boy in Illinois hired a hooker online after his parents left him alone for the weekend, she robbed him. Maybe next time he will remember to use Angie’s List. A woman got pulled over for a DUI and told police she was celebrating getting her license back after her previous DUI arrest. Former Vice Mayor of Mount Carmel Tenessee was arrested for speeding and flashing his genitals at a number of women on the interstate. Red Dragons to you sir! And finally, a Texas mother delayed treatment of her son’s gunshot wound to the leg so she could check webmd. After all of this exciting news the guys had to determine who was going to get hit in the balls by a swinging ball and they decided this by playing Rock Paper Scissors. But Ellis had a trick up his Aussie sleeve, dynamite. I’ve never heard of it, nor did Tully or Josh but to be fair I decided to get some votes on whether it is legit or not so, vote here for yes, here for no.

A taco shop in Florida got in trouble for selling lion tacos, apparently they have a bit of overpopulation and lions go great with pico de gallo. Today was a great day, so great in

A little lower!

A little lower!

fact that they did another awe inspiring episode of Doin’ Stuff With Rawdog! Here is a list of some of the things he expertly explained in such a way that only the Tussin Wolf can. The proper way to put your boat in the water, how to barefoot water ski, how to bleed your brakes, how to make ketchup, how to wrap and ship a vase, how to treat and dress a gunshot wound to the leg, how to build a ramp, the proper way to put on and wear a cock ring, and how to give a neck to nuts back massage. Eventually this segment will be on a best of and then you can hear it for yourself because details like these cannot merely be written in words.

Randy Jackson said something about something that nobody really gives a shit about yo yo yo. The Rolling Stones are the worlds oldest babies. Brook Mueller wants to be in rehab with Lindsay but we all know the truth, she’s just a butt mule of Adderall. Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie made wine, correction, they hired a guy to make wine for them. But all jokes aside this is a great wine with slight after tones of strawberry pez and a smooth gluteny finish. Blubber the blee bla blo ptthhhhhh and Hogan and a sex tape and who fuckin cares. Teen moms porno has been released so if you want to see her kick a goal for teen moms everywhere, just visit the nearest spank bank in your hood. Lisa Lampanelli has done what science has deemed impossible, she got down to 140 pounds! Somebody brought up the subject of wine and being The Jason Ellis Show they held nothing back and told everyone the truth about wine, it sucks. The wine industry has convinced the world that piss and grape juice is delicious. Wine is for wonen and dudes that are like women, of you want to be a real man, drink beer and whiskey and rum and pass out in the front yard like your supposed to! That reminds me of the first time I did yer mum doggy style. It took six shots of tequila to get her to do it. Two to let me fuck her, and the other four to get her in the front yard barking like a dog! But that was a long time ago, now it takes six shots just to get her nasty naked ass back in the house, OH!

Oh, here’s that chick that shook her money makers at a hockey ref.

Show re-cap for Friday 5-3-2013

Its WGAFF and if you give a fuck then your out of the club! We’re the best and be proud of your self for being the best, except you there, your only second best. The guys started off by talking about how good their show is, and how shitty other shows are. It’s like getting rock-hard-power-creampunched in the mouth with silver teeth, having silver teeth sounds awesome, but not when they’re blasting through your face. It’s a perfect analogy.  Ellis’s movie of the day is Point Break, mainly because of the incredible acting by the Australian cop at the end, that dude should have won an Emmy mate! Then they started talking about  how to get rich, Ellis could either start adding commercials to his radio show or start a pyramid schemes or make a fake product like hair tonic and boner strengthened in one. Hairy boners may be a side effect. Ellis dreamed he dropped a N bomb on air or maybe just said niggy but that’s even worse according to Josh Adam Richmond anyway. Where is the line? Gay, fag, homo, fairy, fruity, pillow biting ass bandit? No matter what AIDS isn’t funny, and this message has been brought to you by Downzing. We here at NoYouAre go to great lengths not to offend anyone but if you are offended by something you have read or saw on our site please follow this link and write us so we may correct the issue. Oh, and in case you weren’t sure, it’s not cool to show your friends your dick or for your friends to show you their dick, unless that’s what your into, then you meat gazers have fun.

Tully read a story about ghost hunters and then gifted us with a little ghost story that he experienced from his childhood. Somewhere in the basement of his home there was

Have you seen Michael? I need to fuck up his printer again.

Have you seen Michael? I need to fuck up his printer again.

something that kept fucking up his word processor printer. Might be a ghost, might be magnets, how the fuck do they work anyway? Kengie The Killer came into the studio promoting his new book. He hung out for a while and just shot the shit with the guys. In Hollywood news, Lohan went in the Betty Ford Clinic, it’s still not where the judge wanted her to go but apparently it’s good enough to keep her out of jail. Then there was something about the Elmo dude. And just in time for Mothers Day, Kobe Bryant is suing him mom because she auctioned off a bunch of stuff he gave her and he says it was still his stuff.

In dumbass news, two pilots decided to leave a pair of stewardesses in charge and they couldn’t keep their fingers to themselves and kicked the plane off autopilot almost crashing the whole damn thing, can you guess the dumbasses? A few shows back Rawdog accused small tittly loving Ellis of not being able to handle a pair of massive mammies and to settle this challenge, Karla (@mzkarlaxoxo), Alia (@bestboobsinporn), and Tyadore (@matrixbabe) all came in for the best molester titty groping contest. They blindfolded each girl and one by one, pound for pound, they molested groped felt up caressed each woman. First up was Rawdog with a laughably embarrassing 12 year old boy technique. Alia gave him a crash course on mammary manipulation to prepare for the next two girls. Carla Lane was next and enjoyed the newly educated and ever gentle caress of Rawdog. In round three Ellis won with his more aggressive tweaking of Tyadore’s ta tas.
Apparently after the contest the second girl, Carla, mentioned to Ellis that she really liked the Tussin Wolf and Ellis Mate got her digits to slip to him. After hearing this the only thing I could think was, “aww shit, the dog better slap that ass and get a ticket for the hump bus to smash town!!!!” Speaking of getting laid, here’s the video of the Australian woman getting fucked at the gas pump. And now I present you with the Greatest Guitar Riff finally, finally:
Voodoo Child WINNER
Sweet Child O Mine
Money For Nothing WINNER
South Of Heaven
And the greatest riff in the history of string benders is… Money For Nothing!
Its that guy, in case you see him at Walmart or Target or something.

Its that guy, in case you see him at Walmart or Target or something.

A 50 year old man was munching rug in the coat store, oh yeah. Actually he was on crystal meth and was eating carpet lint thinking its sparkles. Some family somewhere walks on all fours. Some kids got suspended for torquing, whatever the fuck that is, and Travis Pastrana got the pole this weekend, and he gets to start first in the NASCAR race, da dum tss! A beady eyed buddy from the north called in with a story of how he shit in a cat box. And speaking of Canada, they loosened the import regulations on mozzarella cheese and now pizza is cheaper, enjoy your new found freedom Canooks. Towards the end of the show, Rawdizzle was saying that he may not give Carla the sausage because he feels uncomfortable about her being a porn star and doesn’t just want to ram his rod into random box. Speaking of yer mum, congrats on her getting her website mentioned on the show today, must be a big boost for lustfulkitty.tumbler.com!