Tag Archives: Alison Eastwood

The Big Fucking History of “Big Fucking Mega Boat” – Part 1 (History)

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For a movie that is only a reported 22min long and has been billed by J.Ellis as one of the worst things he’s ever seen, it has taken a long, long road to being made. Part 1 of the History of BFMB starts at the initial idea, the plans with Donald Schultz, developing the script , all the way up to just before they started filming.

He-man leads to 80’s toys, leads to the “Battleship” movie,  and then the 1st spark of “BFMB” – 2/1/12 – 8min

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Allison Eastwood will be the director for BFMB? – 2/3/12 – 2min

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Malin Akerman in studio and Grant’s “Kawaski” tattoo leads to the mention of Sgt. Kawaski and BFMB – 2/9/12 – 4min

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David Faustino gets pitched BFMB – 2/14/12 – 1min

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Shoebox gets pitched BFMB – 2/15/12 – 2min

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Donald Schultz in studio to discuss sets and script ideas for BFMB – 2/21/12 – 50min

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Donald Schultz returns, claims he has a submarine for the movie? Lots more movie ideas- 3/8/12 – 43min

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Rawdog will be the MGM Lion – 3/14/12 – 3min

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The idea of go karts at K1 Speed is announced and the characters/actors are set – 4/4/12 – 72min

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Show Re-cap For Tuesday 3/20/2012

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The show started out talking about how surprising Dr. Drew and Psycho Mike were, as in they were good guests and didn’t come off as dicks at all. Ellis also talked about how much he cares about the fans and he sometimes stresses out over helping and entertaining the fans. It’s nice to hear that he doesn’t forget about the fans, no matter how jilted of a lover you may be. Rawdog is officially deaf, he can’t hear his father’s Tweety Bird speech and now he can’t hear the word “cunt” when Mel Gibson was berating his chick. Rawdog is still kind of bummed out, he’s on Ellis’ payroll, but he still needs a roommate as his rent is $1600 per month. Jude recommended he get a part-time job like he had to do when he was on Jenny Jones and was a bathroom attendant at gay bar. That’s hustlin’ right there. The idea of Death! Death! Die! being Rawdog’s roommate was put forth and that immediately terrified Rawdog (probably for good reason) because he’ll come up to a lube room and Mötley Crüe playing on the stereo.

There was more talk about the movie “Big Fucking Mega-Boat” and ideas on the conflict between Ellis’ character and the boat itself. Sounds like Ellis may play a lifeguard and be afraid of rabbits, tentacles, and some other stuff I don’t remember. And the Big Fucking Mega-Boat itself will shoot smaller boats and whatever else it wants, pending on the fears it senses a person may have. And of course there will be jet ski stunts and shit, which I’m hoping look very similar in quality to the animated picture on the above right. It also sounds like Alison Eastwood is going to ask her dad, Clint Eastwood, if he would read a “It’s halftime America, for big fucking mega-boat” line for the movie as well.

And I think that pretty much covers it, and your mom, like when she’s in a bukkake scene. OH!

Show Re-cap For Thursday 2/2/2012

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Animal ManToday’s show was brought to you by the letter “G”, now on to more interesting things. There was talk about what would be the best thing/s to be made out of. The Michelin Man seemed to bring all this discussion on. There were so many conglomerations I couldn’t possibly list them all, but I think (not real sure) the end result was:

  • Owl for a head
  • Pythons for arms
  • Bird for torso
  • Kangaroos for legs

Alison Eastwood stopped by the show today. Yes that’s Clint Eastwood’s daughter so there’s a good chance that when she’s old, she’ll look like an old leather shoe. She’s got kind of a deep voice for a female (I hope Clint is not reading this), just imagine Clint with his balls in his throat and that’s what she sounds like. She talked about giving Rawdog a colonic, which is pretty hardcore and disturbing since I completely believe she would. Apparently she doesn’t like hair in guys’ butt cracks, so… there’s that.

Donald RamboShe sounds pretty smart about quite a few things, nutrition in general. She also says she listens to the show and has even tried to call in. I’m assuming Cumtard hung up on her because he’s cumtarded. She carries a motherfucking switchblade and drinks a lot, there’s proof positive that Clint is her father and she must be a kick ass person. She also seemed very open and honest, she also had a great sense of humor and didn’t hold back on anything that I could tell. So overall she was a pretty awesome guest. Oh, yeah, and Donald Schultz (@donaldschultz) was also there.

Fred Durst also stopped by the show, which I can’t say I care about really. I was waiting to hate him from the get go and oddly, I didn’t. He didn’t act like a dickhole, asshole, or any other kind of hole. I know, surprising right? I seriously thought for sure this guy was gonna come off like a prick, instead, he Anderson Silva’d me. I still don’t like his music, and I could still care less about him, but his interview was alright I suppose. I found it a little boring, so I don’t have much to say on his interview.

That’s about it for the show. The majority of the show (about 3 hours) was spent interviewing Alison Eastwood and Fred Durst, no shit. Kind of like how the majority of gang bangs your mom is in are about 3 hours long.

Franklin, a gay listener, requests sex scenarios. Allison Eastwood calls in with a suggestion – 7/15/10 (History)

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Allison Eastwood talks about calling The J.Ellis Show – 2/2/12

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