Tag Archives: Kit Cope

Show Re-cap For Thursday 12/6/2012

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Oy Mate, It’s me Jason Ellis! I shit in your mom’s fishtank, Red Dragons ya cunt.

A set of double D tits is better to have for a year than a set of dog’s balls on your face, fact!  Oh, and its Thursday, also fact!  From here on out its total bullshit, so lets get to it.  Ellismate is still doing his home jail house workout, but is stuck in between ripped and Rawdog.  Meanwhile, at the Ellis estates, #burgerellis got his first x-ray today, Red Dragons to you my puppy friend.  Hey, if your ever in Vegas at Drais Afterhours, be sure to look for Jason Ellis, catching VIP treatment and taking photos n shit.  Turns out Kit Cope has a friend who was in Vegas this weekend, and saw Ellis there, high on ecstasy with some Asian chic.  Only Ellis wasn’t in Vegas, so what the fuck – We have an imposture!  Of course Ellis hit Kit up on the air to try and get to the bottom of it, and Kit quoted a line from the fake Ellis “I am Jason Ellis and I make lots of money talking on the radio”.  Cumtard tried to get in touch with Drais, but everyone’s still sleeping so it remains a mystery.  Dogs are dumb, babies are dumber, and baby dogs are dumberer than all.  Not this dog yo, he be riding it til the wheels fall off.  So naturally that video led to Tully, drunk off his ass of course, verse a dog in a race to the death.  Sounds cool, but not sure about the legality’s of that.  If we were in Thailand though, game fucking on! Sounds like Ellis wants to take the show there for a few weeks, and maybe get a group salad tossing with Josh to bond as brothers.  Tully did point out the 3-7 AM time frame, but again, game fucking on!  Its not likely to happen though, as they can’t even get out to Ellis, Kansas let alone friggin Thailand.  One Day!

 

Rawdog just misses his McGriddles…

Mike Dolce joined the show to talk diet and health n shit, and if you listen to the show for health and to get good advice about it, you want to go back and check this out.  Mike’s a trainer for a shit ton of UFC fighters like Vitor Belfort, Johnny Hendricks, Quinton Rampage Jackson and many others.  He helps them cut weight, but not by starvation, rather a good diet and discipline, fucking sucks I know.  Dude knows his shit, which is as basic as eating earth grown stuff every 2 to 4 hours while awake, and til your satisfied not full.  Sure you gotta change up your lifestyle, but you don’t have to be nuts about it.  Mike on the other hand carries a book bag with a day of food and supplies n shit, such as almond butter, oat bran, and hemp hearts (What the fuck is a hemp heart?).  He’s written a few books on it, which Ellis and Rawdog each plan to try out.  For Josh, he will be checking out Living Lean, while Ellis is more of a 3 Weeks to Shredded guy.  Of course Rawdog is the Darth Vader of nutrition so we shall see how he does.  Other cool shit we learned, just cause its 100% natural don’t mean shit, bleach can be 100% natural and ain’t good for you.  Alcohol is a poison anyway you slice it, but weed is mellow as long as ingested not inhaled, since its better than any prescription drug you can get.  Also you need 9 hours of sleep a night, and avoid Crossfit all together as its gayer than you are my homo friend.

 

                 Oh yeah, DING!

 

Dana White, the man the myth the legend, called the show to shoot some UFC breeze with the wing.   I wonder if Dana owns a $450 Starbuck’s metal card?  Not sure, but I can guarantee you he own’s quite a few assistants, all of which are hotter than Ellis’s new assistant Ryan.  Ryan’s a happy dude who loves the Dead Kennedy’s and is from Vancouver.  Back to Dana White, so he’s “friggin’ awesome” and he loves Ellis, thinks the wing is the coolest.  So anyways, which fight is Ellis most pumped to see asked Dana, how about the Cain Velasquez/Junior dos Santos fight which ain’t even this weekend.  FUCK, stupid brain say dumb things go DUH!  Rawdog fed him a few of the fights on this weekends free UFC on FOX5, and Ellis is siked to see both the Benson Henderson/Nate Diaz and the BJ Penn/Rory MacDonald fights, calling Benson Henderson a ‘freak horse human’ so check it out.  Ellis also was a bit pissed at the final on this season’s Ultimate Fighter, but its Team Carwin no matter what happened for him.  Ellis added he was going to go check the videos from the weigh-ins, which Dana reminded him haven’t even happened yet.  Moral of the story kids, if you like to hear Dana White, go back and check this out as you may never hear him again on TJES after today!  In other meaningless news, Snakes on a Plane ain’t just a shitty movie anymore.  This other dude blamed a cat for the murder of a lawyer.  Last but not least, Rory MacDonald dresses like a French Canadian fag, and Tully’s wife is madly in love with Manny Pacquiao.

 

Well no fucking wonder….

Not much today in the way of Hollywood News, just the grammy’s.  Rawdog played a bunch of gay award-winning gay music to show Ellis what was hot this past year.  Maybe Death! Death! Die! can be in next year’s Grammy nominations, I mean shoebox knows a guy.  Just record a clean version of Big Funky Mega Boat and its on like Donkey Kong.  If I may be serious for a second, #fucktully for reminding us about Ghost Dad, i mean really dude.  But not for beating Linsanity with pillows and thundersticks, thats just fucking cool and necessary. Cats kill babies, its all true, and all over the internet.  They literally will “take the breath” of your infant, so watch out.  Stars too will literally take the Ellis show, and just fuck it up to beyond recognition, or so thinks Ellis. He’s fucking done with those assholes, they don’t care and can’t get it right.  His original intention for even being on that shit station was to fucking put it to Covino n Rich.  But those dudes turned out to be cool and care about radio n shit, and with all the fuck ups over the years, its just time to move on.  Will kill joyed any Faction replay ideas since too many people like punk and need a channel for it.  Whatever happens, we will always have our little noon to four on the west coast to look forward too, and Sirius on demand if we miss it, except in Canada I hear.  And your mom always has her Skechers and Crossfit training to look forward too as well, oh and like 13lbs. of shit and load we’ve been saving up for her, OH!

Hulk Hogan sex tape (History)

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If you have been paying attention to gossip news lately, you’ve probably seen that the Hulk Hogan sex tape is becoming a major news item. The guys briefly discussed the sex tapes, Hulk Hogan, and Bubba a couple times before they left for vacation. Who’s lying? Is Hulk the victim he says he is?

Hulk Hogan Sex tape – 10/10/12

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Hulk Hogan Sex tape – 10/11/12

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Hulk Hogan Sex tape – 10/12/12

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In fact the guys talked about the rumor of a Hulk Hogan sex tape over 6 months earlier!

Hulk Hogan Sex tape – 3/7/12

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The sex tape is really all just superficial bullshit. What interests me is the people behind it. Namely Bubba and Heather. They have actually effected The Jason Ellis Show more than you might realize….

How so? Let’s recall the history between BTLS and Ellis:

Let’s set the stage. Back in 2005 Spike TV began to help promote the UFC. It was part of their strategy to provide a channel with programming for guys. In 2006 one of their new tv shows to begin taping was a program called “Wild World of Spike” starring Ellis and muay thai fighter Kit Cope. In addition, the UFC often promoted their events by inviting popular radio programs to broadcast from Las Vegas the day before a major fight. One of the radio shows chosen early on was The BTLS Show. Add up all those elements and you get: The BTLS Show, Ellis, Heather, Kit Cope, and Matt Hughes all in Vegas, live on satellite radio, on 8/26/2006 for UFC 62.

The BTLS Show, live in Las Vegas – 8/26/2006

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Ellis calls in to promote ‘Wild World of Spike’ – 1/5/2007

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So UFC fighter Matt Hughes choked out Jason, so what? Well that moment could be considered a (or the?) major catalyst that started Ellis’s interest in MMA and boxing. Soon after, Kit Cope began helping Jason get started in the gym. His boxing training lead to Ellismanias. Ellismanias lead to Fuel TV shows, a book deal, a bigger contract, etc. Besides Tony Hawk asking Ellis to join him on Demolition Radio, it may be one of the biggest turning points in Jason’s career.

Early fans of The Jason Ellis Show also may know that a ‘beef’ later developed between Jason and Bubba. That ‘radio battle’ carried on till Bubba eventually left satellite radio around December 2010. Ellis took that as a win and a big ego boost. He gained a lot of Bubba’s old fans and it, again, helped him gain that bigger contract. Shoebox began the trouble (anyone remember the name “Debbie Hernandez”?) but it was our good pal Gabe Rudiger that really got things stirred up.

BTLS flips out over Ellis – 6/11/10

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The Gabe Ruediger incident – 8/27/10

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Ellis/Andrea and Bubba/Heather divorced almost simultaneously in the fall/winter 2011. If you recall, soon after the two marriages dissolved Heather began following and tweeting to @ellismate. The tweets, and especially the fans that got involved by tweeting @Andreamate, caused serious issues. It got so intense that Ellis smashed the Macbook Dingo gave him as a birthday present and Jason almost quit twitter (Andrea wisely did).

Bubba divorce mention 10/10/11

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Heather Clem tweets Ellis – 12/5/11

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Fans cause drama between Andrea & Heather Clem – 12/13/11

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Ellis finally loses his temper, plans to close his twitter account and smashes his Macbook – 12/20/11

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Following those outbursts, The Jason Ellis Show has changed quite a bit. Although I suppose it’s up for debate, I would argue that after those events Ellis became more guarded talking about his personal life and has become noticeably less friendly with the fans/callers.

Show Re-cap For Friday 7/6/2012

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It’s Friday people, I’m glad you give enough of a fuck to read this because I barely give enough of a fuck to write it. So here we fucking go. French people are annoying shit fucks and this has been proven yet again by Tully annoying incredibly tanned neighbors. Even the French that are in Canada. I’ve been told by my beady eyed friends that they don’t like them much either. The A6K is broke again, or still. Lights, smoke, bells, the familiar sounds of the A6K. The guys were talking about Sammy Davis Jr mostly because they played Mr Bojangles before the show, and if you haven’t seen the video then you will here. Just try not to stare too hard at the Anaconda that he’s smuggling. Will “look at those shins” Pendarvis did Hollywood news and I have come to the conclusion that Hollywood is really fucked up. I could go into more detail about it but then I couldn’t tell every one that a woman is needed for the final scene in Big Fucking Mega Boat. That’s right ladies, if you can make your pussy sing that sweet sweet song and queef for the camera, you can be on Big Fucking Mega Boat, just send an email to jellis@siriusxm.com.

Tully did his new signature segment, Women, Am I Right?, and I am beginning to think that there are a lot of crazy broads out there. Better learn to sleep with one eye open and a finger on the trigger. I’m joking, I can’t sleep with an eye open. Breaking news, Justin Bieber’s balls have finally dropped and police in California ticketed him for going 100 miles per hour on the freeway. Kit Cope might not be at EllisMania 8 next week for reasons that are currently unknown so if he does pull out the pro shock collar fight will be cancelled. Final calls were more listenable than usual, still not saying much. A dude called in that got “shot” yesterday because he didn’t get his story out in a reasonable amount of time, and guess what, same thing happened today. So if you know this guy, give him a few leg kicks for us. A college girl called in with a Dude Am I A Slut, and she has banged about 6 guys on the water polo team, bareback. Yup, she’s a slut and the water polo team can’t stop giving each other high fives. Speaking of polo teams, yer mum had quite the tear through the polo team when she was in college, unfortunately the riders kept getting mad because she was only blowing the horses, OH!

We heard yer mum was going to be here.

Show Re-cap For Tuesday 6/26/2012

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I speak the truth! Just kidding

Holy shit! Did you guys hear the news that rocked the world today? Rawdog is now engaged to that chick he’s been dating and they plan on moving to Rhode Island because that’s where her family is from, so no more Rawdog on the show and Rude Jude will be taking his place! Fucking huge bummer, but could be kinda cool having Jude on, right? Well that would be some shocking Asia news if I wasn’t totally lying my ass off right now. Really though, he hates hot chicks just as much as he hates MMA fighters, but loves a chick that can twirl a baton. As Tully has speculated before, Rawdog really does enjoy when he gets punched in the nuts with the Hulk hands. This was confirmed today when Rawdog punched himself right in the dick, harder than Tully has ever punched him. In other, actually truthful news, Ellismania8.com is now online and ready to siphon the money out of your pockets. You know how Ellis ran into Big Black while he was in Miami doing the Hooters judging shit? Yea, well now Big Black wants to help judge the bikini competition at Ellismania 8! That’s motha fuckin’ dope, y’all! Do work, son!

MMA makes you gay

Ellis got his A6K back after West Coast Customs had finished fixing it up, the inside looks brand new, has a navigation system for dumb dumbs in it, all the electronics work in it without breaking all the other shit, and now he’s in love with West Coast Customs. Rightfully so I assume. They offered to fix up the outside of the truck as well but he declined, probably a wise choice or it would’ve come back with massive wings and glitter on it or some shit. All kinds of trash talk flying between Anderson Silva and Chael Sonnen, sounds like Anderson is finally losing his shit and says he’s basically going to ruin Chael’s face for all his trash talking. We all know a lot of fighters do this to help sell tickets, but Anderson has never really gotten into the whole trash talking game so it is rather odd to hear him go off like that. Sad vegetables aren’t as good as happy vegetables, which makes total sense when you think about how they were raised. I mean, if the vegetables’ parents were abusive or addicts, one would expect life to be much more difficult for the young vegetable.

Facts about your mom

Good news for @Dutch_RDS, he’s getting his shot to fight at Ellismania 8 in the blindfold shock collar fight – so congratulations to him! Ellismania 8 is getting bigger and bigger by the fucking day with guests such as Kit Cope, Danny Martinez, Kenji Gallo, Gabe Ruediger, Forrest Griffin, Stephan Bonnar, Big Black, Mayhem, and more! You shitheads that get to go to Ellismania 8 are lucky as fuck. I hope you all enjoy yourselves and you better take a metric shit ton of photos and videos so the rest of us can live vicariously through you! 50 Cent got in an accident when a Mac truck rear-ended his SUV, sources say the Mac truck is now in hiding after receiving death threats. Today was new music Tuesday, and fuck all that noise, we ain’t talking about it. That Laura chick that gave Ellis his current voice altimication machine was on the show today to give him another fuckin’ TC-1000 Boner Jam Fucker Upper v2.74 altimication machine that has a touch screen and shit. I want one so bad but I ain’t got $800 to be pissing away just so I can call my wife with a creepy voice.

I got the magic stick

More Wolfknives members called in to get their names today, and according to my accounting records there is currently $2.4 million dollars worth of memberships. Also, I am not an accountant and I keep no records – for legal purposes. Some dude who has at least two ex-wives and is an investigator, watched his first ex-wife have sex with some dude. I’m guessing the whole trust issue thing came into play while he was practicing his Magnum PI skills on her. Speaking of practicing, your mom has been going to the gym a lot lately. After all the dudes are done working out and smooching themselves in the mirrors, they all got in a circle with your mom in the middle and took turns shitting in her mouth. You thought there was gonna be a circle jerk story there, didn’t you? Don’t lie! But seriously, she has been going to the gym and putting the 25 pound kettle bells in her snatch. You have to tell her to stop, people are complaining. OH!