Show Re-cap for Tuesday 10/14/14

Welcome to your Tuesday recap ladies and gents tempopermanentlyish hosted by the one and only me, jenny, whom you have all come to sorta know and sort of love. Cue the music cause boom, time to talk about what went down on the show today!!!!

Getting right to it- Ellis is thinking that he wants to get some samurai’s tattooed on the backs if his legs because Sa Continue reading

Show Re-Cap for Tuesday 5/27/14

Holy fuck, they should make every weekend a three day weekend. I got so much masturba-…uh, housework done. It was just the free time I needed to soil two huge piles of clean clothes with my seme-…ummm, fold, I meant fold, not soil. I also was able to wash down my grimey ass stove with a layer of hot jizz. Not a typo. No corrections. I busted a can of spray on the stove. Welcome to Oakland, bitch. Anyways, it’s almost that magical time of the day when Faction stops letting shitty pop music get mixed in with their punk, metal and hip-hop, and Jason Ellis takes over to be all Australian and shit. Today’s show got started with talk about how having a huge cock should be something that people admire personally. It doesn’t necessarily need to be a big public thing, but if you happen to get into porn, well then you’re just an egotistical asshole. Dingo was in the studio today, being the Dingo, as he’s known to do. He was at some EDC thing in New York over the weekend and if I cared at all about techno music I would have paid attention. Jude also was hanging out today and the guys talked beards and haircuts and how some proper grooming can take years off of your face. Unless you go for the beard implants, then you’re just an egotistical asshole. Tully broke it all down as an equation of how long people are trying to stay in the cool game nowadays, and how they’re all trying too god damn hard and just cause you know how to make a martini with an egg doesn’t mean your saggy balls are worth anybody’s time. The guys listened to some audio of Dingo talking to Cullen about his attempt last week at doing interviews at Street League for the show and how the audio sucked and Jason was a little too harsh about it. Jason apologized, and explained that @shit_toboggan could see lots of the fans on twitter sounded pretty bored with the whole thing, so it maybe wasn’t as much of a success as he was hoping for. Jude made sure to tell Dingo not to suck so bad at interviewing people and to check his god damn sound levels like he’s got some fucking idea what he’s doing and maybe the second try will be a little better. All joking aside though, Ellis, Jude and Tully shared a few war stories of fucked up remote sessions of years past and how it’s not always the host’s fault. Jude once had a porn star taste test his semen on air and forgot to turn on the microphones, but luckily it was against the rules of radio so #Allegedly it didn’t happen. This made Ellis recant that time he tried drinking his piss to try and be like Leo Machida, and he went into great detail about the distinct tang and self loathing that human urine creates when ingested orally. Jason is still healing from his heart surgery last week. He went to take a piss the other day and his stomach was abnormally swollen and he had bruises all around where the doctors went in through his groin to do stuff to his ticker. Jude let us all know that he’s pretty much perfected his ass washing technique, just gotta get some Irish Spring and a washcloth and don’t let anybody know how deep you fist yourself with that washcloth cause it could jeopardize your career in the hip hop industry. The guys talked for a while about ways to market Junkie Piss Popsicles, and all the different ways you could cross promote other cheap last resort ways to get high, like Syzzurp-sicles. And before we get too far off topic, styrofoam really does hold in the cold better than plastic Solo cups. Tully decided to scroll through Dingo’s Instagram photos to see if they could guess who he knows that drinks a lot of syzzurp, and while Dingo wouldn’t necessarily sell them out, there were some guesses that would certainly be believable to the average man with a decent grasp on pop culture. This was a perfect segue for Jude and Dingo to criticize Jason’s nose and give suggestions on how he should fix his mangled honker. After some discussion of plastic surgery, Ellis started thinking that if hair implants don’t work, it may be time to start investing in wigs. Jude gave his two cents on how people who get laser hair removal around the giblets are probably doing the world a disservice when they get older cause that’s when people are more likely to be inspecting that whole area. But on the plus side, America has won the war against crabs. No, not the ones from New England, I mean the ones that crawl on your nuts and fuck up a perfectly good set of sheets while making you itch so god damn hard you’ll rip your scrotum off if it would just make the pain stop. Jude started getting hot and bothered talking about Princess Leia in her slave outfit at Jabba’s Palace, which is when Ellis broke the news that he’s gonna get a dungeon so that he can consensually sexually abuse people. Dingo completely misunderstood what Jason meant by dungeon and started imagining a place with outside access to order a pizza, DirecTV and an Xbox. Like an in-law cottage or something off the back of someone’s house. Jude remembers one time when he went to a BDSM bar and came across a lady who was unnaturally tall but it turns out she just had a guy who would follow her around and lay down for her to stand on everywhere she went. That said, and the new release of Hyena should be out in a few months, so get the fuck on it. Tully tried to drive around the city giving out burgers but all the homeless people were on vacation and also his wife shut him the fuck down. Also, he tried to give one to a gay prostitute but his wife didn’t want a gay Mexican hooker following them home begging for scraps. The guys took some calls and stuff. There was some talk about a Grenade/Wolfknives crossover product of some sort, then Dingo brought up a picture Katie put on Instagram of a fake penis tattoo on her foot that Kelly Osbourne saw. Somebody has been obsessively tweeting a petition to save the rhinos at Ellis and Dingo and the guys talked for a while about how stupid it is to drive an entire species out of existence just cause you think that rhino horn is gonna give you a stronger erection. The guys all aired out the massively overgrown pubes adorning their hippie vags and had an environmental awareness session to remind the human race that it really is our fault for everything, and it’s kind of true except for the few who try to make a difference. Tully found a news story about the guy who invented Soylent (which will surely cause him a lawsuit for plagiarizing the name of the famous Charlton Heston movie) and how it would be good for the world as a whole if more people could climb on board with the whole “drink all of your meals in a slightly semen-like concoction that an overworked programmer came up with because he couldn’t be bothered to go grocery shopping and cook properly” train. Fucking nutrients and shit. Remember when I mentioned Ellis’ swollen stomach? Well apparently he’s also had apocalyptic flatulence for the last few days. Chicken-egg, something like that, but all the same he’s a model rocket engine waiting for a light. While we all laugh to ourselves about other people’s intestinal disfunctions, let’s have some awesome world to remind us that heaven has naked bitches and chocolate everywhere and a pretty sweet ramp.


MOTO NEWS YA BEE-YIE-ITCH!!! Some guys rode some dirtbikes at Glen Helen over the weekend, and a good time was had by all. The guys talked about how much people in TV need to maybe give it a rest, like Oprah Winfrey and that god damn Lindsay Lohan show that really doesn’t give any important information or solve any problems or exist for any reason other than existing. Somebody sent in a sweet little RC car ramp for Jason to jump those cars that Ken Block gave him. In particular today, the ramps were used as a testing session for a future wheel of doom loser who would have to lie down the long way between the launch and landing and see if the cars could clear it. With Cumtard being the show’s whipping post for now and probably all time, he was the one to get in the hot seat to see if these miniature machines can fly as hard and far as they are assumed to be able to. After a few rough runs in practice, with coming up short and front flips and smashing the fuck out of Dingo’s knee and all kinds of other mishaps, Kevin finally got in place to make his attempt not to lose a testicle for the show, and in true tard fashion he decided to guard his face instead, but luckily for him the car got right over him with no great catastrophes. The guys talked for a bit about the UFC fights that happened this weekend and that one guy who kept fighting despite his ankle being shattered and not just kept fighting but KICKED SOME FUCKIN’ ASS!!! There was more MMA talk as there tends to be whenever the topic comes up. I went out for dinner last night and wound up watching a few minutes of MMA with some folks over outrageously overpriced burgers and a milkshake that ended up being more calories than I’m used to but absolutely delicious and satisfying at the same time. So there’s that, fighting and red meat. As much as I talk about leaving America, I did partake in two of our oldest pastimes. That said, the guys decided to take a break which was promptly derailed by malfunctioning equipment at SiriusXM in which they fucked up a Beatles song, and a bumper, and then a Machine Head song, but in the end it sorted itself out.


HAVE YOU BEEN TO HATEBEAN.COM?!?!?! It basically just links to the one HateBean shirt on Ellis’ website, but before that, you can read some incredible slack-jawed engrish that will surely put a smile on your face. Before you do that though, Doug Benson came by the studio to hang out for a while. They talked accents and how Jason can occasionally turn his off when he needs it and Dingo tried to be an American but it was like a New York Jew from the 23rd layer of hell. Jason told the story of how he was talking to a friend from the motherland and was really shook by just how Australian he was. Doug noticed that there was a box of kleenex, a bottle of purell, and a blu-ray copy of the Korean version of the movie Old Boy, and that brought up the question have you ever jerked off with purell? And if so, how bad does it sting? Dougs answer was yes, and I didn’t start smoking weed till 28 when I was a comic on the road. While Jason was cleaning up the shelf he couldn’t help but notice that there was other weird crap on their like nuts, dental floss, a timer, and all kinds of other chotchkies that apparently didn’t get the memo that there would be no chotchkies in the new studio. The guys talked for a bit about how purell is a steaming load of commercialist fear mongering and how WILSON needs to stop napping on the torture couch and get himself a real apartment, even though he’s never gonna be there cause he works 72 hours a day. The boys talked psychology and how it’s really stupid that there’s a guy who can give you a reference to the guy who’s gonna give you the actual treatment, and how the guy who gives you the treatment could at least pretend to be a little more interested in performing some sort of treatment on another person’s mental state so they don’t have sleepwalking murder episodes. A psychological professional called in to explain the difference between all the psychological professionals and what their different ranks mean and it made enough sense, aside from the fact that no one can figure out which one gets to say when you can stop dumping medication in your face. Doug got called out for being really friendly with the porn community, but still complaining that he’s not getting laid often enough, and he responded by demanding a lie detector test. Basically, he wants his blow jobs to have some feeling behind them, and not just a love of sucking dick or crystal meth or proving someone’s dad right. And fuck what you heard, comedians don’t have groupies. The group basically settled the whole matter by coming up with a game where Doug tears through a slew of hot ladies and the world holds up their hands for for him to high five at his leisure. And if that fails, Bonnie Rotten and Ronda Rousey get to fight for the Benson dick. Or maybe Doug can just plow through a whole bunch of his fans, cause they’re great people in his eyes and he loves hanging out with them, so if they happen to want to blow him, he’s pretty much got the pick of the litter. Doug told a few stories about getting kicked out of hotels for smoking weed in the rooms, and swimming with sharks, and how to cook up the best romantic getaway for him to share a bongload with the victor of the “Win Doug Benson’s Semen” death match that will almost surely be part of EllisMania 10. There was some talk about what celebrities would be best to invite onto Doug’s YouTube show “Getting Doug With High” and there have been some memorable ones, like David Cross and Eric Andre, but some of the suggestions floated were for the likes of Nick Swardson (who probably wouldn’t because he drinks too much to smoke weed) and Joe Rogan (who probably wouldn’t cause he tends to run his own performance more than anything else). The guys took a break so Doug could get some water and Cheetos, then came back with a game for Doug to join in with.


Don’t forget, unsigned bands still happens from time to time, and might be happening again soon, so send your shit in to and you might get a week of unsolicited airplay between noon and 4PM on a satellite radio station. Someone sent in a burnout video of a guy who had purple smoke tires, which I have seen and they are a hilarious addition to any burnout video or drift compilation. I know Kumho Tire makes red, yellow, and blue, but I haven’t seen the purple ones. There’s a couple other companies that make them too, but only for select wheel sizes, so if you feel like adding to these YouTube sensations of rubber shredding destruction, order yourself a pair and fire up the go-pro. That said, IT’S TIME FOR ELLIS JEOPARDY!!! As is par for the course, it’s hilarious to hear a dyslexic Australian try to describe things for other people to figure out, especially when one of the people is a career pothead and another one is an Australian who always seems a bit off track with what’s going on in his immediate vicinity, unless it’s something radical. Frogs are lubey, Doug wants Bonnie Rotten to taste the golden spray, Tully is a pot smoker bordering on addict levels, Whitney Houston is still dead but was wasted like a mother fucker all the way, Dingo can’t keep his dick out of frogs, Chong is constantly cock-blocking Cheech, Yoda is more grey than green but still pretty green, XXX: State Of The Union would have been impossible cause Ice Cube doesn’t have the arm span to jump off a building and grab a helicopter, The Breakfast Club was a classic but it really did bomb for a good reason before it reached cult classic status, Jaws really didn’t need any sequels but when has that ever stopped Hollywood from letting them happen, Bill Murray has jungle fever, and there were no final calls cause Tony Hawk was live and Jeopardy took the whole final hour. Now go stick it so far up your ass you can blow your nose with it.


Red Dragons, Mother Fuckers ,,rr,

Show Re-Cap for Monday 2/24/2014


The pee-pee fairy is real!

So there I was… listening intently to my favorite show when suddenly it dawned on me. “Hey! It’s Monday and I’m supposed to be writing a re-cap!” Cool story, huh? Yeah. Well don’t worry. I’m here! So first things first, the show is from that place where a lot of bimbos are kept, lots tan people (aka Mexicans) are running around, and everyone wears goofy sunglasses that way too large for their heads. Ellis is doing his best to fight the pee-pee fairy, you know – it lives in your underwear and steals the last drop of piss from your wiener. Tully just lives in denial to the pee-pee fairy because he wears really dark underwear, therefore never seeing the tell-tail signs of the pee-pee fairy or his skidmarks. Ellis saw his ex-wife cry in front of Katie. Tiger was getting weirded out about this half black, half white kid chasing him at Sky Zone or whatever trampoline world place they were at to celebrate his birthday. Ellis was busy blowing up balloons and making “blow me” jokes when he saw Devin, mommy, & grandma b-line it to the bathroom. Turns out there was some weird family issue with the aunt and it got pretty uncomfortable and a little tense. Ahhh, family. We’ve all got one. Well most of us do, unless your family is dead or didn’t want you as a child and left you by a trash can at a Walmart. What? Did I say something wrong? Break time!


Ready for training?

And we’re back! Joey Diaz is in studio and we’re talking about the smartest kid ever, who sold Girl Scout cookies outside of a weed dispensary. Joey thinks Ellis looks like the ultimate road warrior, this lead to Joey telling the story of how he knew the key grip or something from the Mad Max movies, which led into Dances With Wolves and failing eye sight as you age. What? You can’t see the connection? Joey recently quit smoking weed, now he just vaporizes it. A lot of it. If you’re familiar with him, you know he’s been a heavy weed smoker for a long time. No, I mean a heavy into weed. Like he out baked Doug Benson heavy. This is him trying to bring his lungs back into shape so he can really start seeing the benefits of jiu-jitsu. We got to hear about how CoCo used to carry around a machine gun and acquired a trunk load of cocaine and how he went to prison. Again, if you’re familiar with Diaz, he’s got more stories than Stephen King and almost all of them are pretty crazy. He kidnapped a dude in 1988, bumped into the dude again in ’94 and tried to apologize but as one might expect, it was accepted. He tried to friend the guy on Facebook, the guy wouldn’t accept his friend request and then a quarter of a century later, the guy calls up Joey on his podcast and finally accepted his apology. See? He’s got some pretty gnarly stories. He talked about the recently deceased Harold Ramis and how he got to have a short part in one of his movies and picked his comedy brain for a couple days. Basically, I could write on for days and days about all the entertaining stories and life this guy has lived, but I just don’t have that kind of time. Fuck, I think the Internet might even run out of 1’s and 0’s if I typed all that shit. So if you want more Joey, catch him on his podcast, catch him on The Joe Rogan Experience, catch him in movies, catch him on Twitter, Facebook, you can catch this guy in a lot of place – just Google him. Break time!


When shit gets outta hand, Bourne-Tard is ready to keep people in line.

And we’re back! Aussie News time with the suicidal reproduction of mouse like marsupials who fuck themselves to death. Time to start paying the price for the bets that were made on the UFC fights this past weekend. To revisit, Tully bet if Rousey lost, he’d drink his own pee, if McMann lost, Cumtard would have to drink his own pee. Rousey won – even though people think the fight was stopped too soon – so that’s sippin’ on some pizzurp time for Kevikins. Cumtard also lost his bet with Ellis since Cummins lost, so now Cumtard will eat normal shit for 45 minutes and then eat a vomit inducing onion. In other MMA News, Cyborg really wants to take out Rousey but feels like Rousey and Dana White are doing all they can to avoid that fight, which isn’t surprising to hear come from Cyborg. A lot of people would like to see that fight happen, but the odds are probably pretty slim that it ever will. Let’s face it, Cyborg isn’t the most well liked fighter, lots of claims of her roid use, she doesn’t want to fight at the champion’s weight, and many people think she’s never fought anyone as good as Rousey. In who gives a shit news, Hulk Hogan is coming back to the WWE, brother. Moto News with Mike Alessie’s incident with Broc Tickle, where Alessie straight up took out Tickle. That bullshit earned him a fine of $4,000 from the AMA and a bunch of hate from fans, riders, and pretty much everyone except his daddy. Break time!


Remember how much Jason Bourne couldn’t handle even smelling onions?

And we’re back! This time with Cowfucker News. Old, inside show joke? Nope. There actually was news about a cow fucking duo busted by a farmer. Now, piss drinking time – allegedly. And there we go. Ok, that was a bit anti-climatic, right? Well it should come as no surprise that this isn’t the first time Tard-Tard has been sippin’ on some pizzurp. So, the only way to remedy this is to put the shock collar on him and make him start eating the onion. Houston, we have vomit. Before he could even get a mouthful in, he started gagging and spitting. The best way I can describe the sound of what happened during the bit is to have you imagine a mentally challenged person fucking the tracheotomy hole of another person, in an insane asylum, while two Japanese chicks barf into bowls who then trade bowls, and begin to consume each other’s vomit, causing them to vomit the other person’s vomit back up, but they vomit the vomit into the tracheotomy hole while the mentally challenged person continue to fuck it. Did you cum yet? Wilson’s super happy about all this because he’s in the middle of trying to hire a new employee while all this is going on, which you just know makes the person looking for a job there, super excited about their potential future career there. And now I just have one final story for you before putting a ribbon on this bitch and calling it my gift to you.


Anyone? Yes? No? Just me?

A woman was in a coma. She had been in it for months. Nurses were in her room giving her a sponge bath. One of them was washing her private area and noticed that there was a slight response on the monitor when she touched her. They tried it again and sure enough there was definite movement. They went to her husband and explained what happened, telling him, “As crazy as this sounds, maybe a little oral sex will do the trick and bring her out of the coma.” The husband was skeptical, but they assured him that they’d close the curtains for privacy. The husband finally agreed and went into his wife’s room. After a few minutes the woman’s monitor flat lined, no pulse, no heart rate. The nurses run back into the room. “What happened!?” they cried. The husband said, “I’m not sure – I think maybe she choked.” Get it? Because he put his dick in her mouth. Instead of giving her oral sex. Get it? OH! (pee on you)

Show Recap for Friday 1/17/2014

Why hello, I didn’t see you over there. Why don’t you pull up a chair and have a seat, I was just thinking about today’s Jason Ellis Show. Oh you missed it? Well let me tell you about it. The boys are broadcasting today from a magical place called Las Vegas during the ass ass titty titty ass titty ass festival otherwise known as the AVN Awards. To be more specific they are at The Hard Rock Hotel set up right in front of The Joint. Ellis forgot to bring his sleeping pills so he feels like a bag of microwaved dicks. None the less, the showbouncy+bouncy+bouncy.+animeniacs_64680c_3787511 must go on, and it did. The beginning of the show was mainly Ellis and Tully talking about the dick suckers, chronic masturbators, and pussy slayers that they see walking around. The first guest was Beatrice. She’s a nurse. She made out with Jason even though he has a cold, a bit irresponsible for a nurse in my opinion. Something else that Tully saw was two old lady’s selling something called the Magic Ball. It’s a bouncy ball that also has a dick on it. That way you can bounce and have things stuffed inside you. Fun times.
After the break the guys were joined by Little Stella Marie. She is a little person, a really little person, she’s a midget. And she’s, surprise surprise, a porn star. What we learned today is that she has a great sense of humor and a shallow vagina so she can only be half shafted. The next guest was the critically acclaimed porn actor Doug Benson. Okay I lied, he’s not critically acclaimed but he is on the show finally. Doug is no stranger to Wankfest and has been going for several years. They talked about porn stars, sober month, weed, Leonardo Dicaprio, and fucking fat chicks. The official porn star of The Jason Ellis Show, Joanna Angel, made her way to the coolest table of cool kids in the entire place to say hi and brag about how she turned her rockstar boyfriend into a porn star boyfriend. And we learned that he has small hands and a big dick, Joanna’s boyfriend, not Doug Benson, he has little hands and a little dick. He’s consistent. Speaking of small penis’s, Asphyxia stopped by too! But she just fell down and never said anything. It’s that kind is excitement you can expect here folks! Another thing you can expect is Asian girls with tiny vagina holes and stretchy buttholes.

Women, am I right!?! They’re talking about porn girls again. A woman in England is suing her divorce lawyer because he didn’t tell her she would no longer be married. Now they’re talking to a porn star again. And now they’re talking with Nicky Benz, you guessed it, a porn star. Starting to see a pattern yet? Here’s a new pattern, YouTube videos. Enjoy.

We came back with a new game called Who Gives A Shit About Porn Stars! And the answer is nobody. Much like Hollywood News, I am now refusing to write about them. So here’s a video.

Yup, still talking about porn, here ya go.

Back from and for a nice change of pace Tully admitted that this entire time he’s been farted on at least five different times today. Ellis told Doug how much he loves Katie and how therapy keeps him from killing everyone. Then they talked to a porn chick, Elizabeth Starr, who’s boobs are continuously growing and will probably kill her, and more walking dick warmers. Here’s another video.

This has been more than enough stories of dick sucking, anal, double and triple penetration, BD/SM, orgies, facials, gaping vagina holes, scat play, dildos, STDs, and masturbation for me, but it’s always nice visiting yer mum, OH!

Also check out Doug Benson’s new YouTube show at 4:15 pacific on Wednesdays at


Show Re-cap for Thursday 3/28/2013

et another Thursday for you and I my friend – I bet your wondering what Ellis said first.  Well, your a fucking pussy.  Yup, were all pussies, including Ellismate himself who said his vag needs to harden the fuck up too.  Apparently The Wing was having a shit day moment, Pansy Fest to be exact.  You see with all the business n shit that came with but after the radio show, its kinda forced Ellis to say shit he usually wouldn’t.  Not all the time, but once in a while is more than he’d enjoy as well all know.  What if it was just radio, and none of the other bullshit like trying to get a TV show for instance.  Like Ellis says, too many fingers in too many pies and the bigger he gets, the less he feels he can say without pissing someone off = Sellout.  I personally don’t agree with that totally, but there is an angle there, and no one wants fish+chips with pizza!  Of course Tully loves beer and ice cream in bed with Ms Tully, its a tradition in the Oxford household.  But #FuckTully right, so back to Ellismate who says he holds back about 1% of the shit he wants to say.  Damn that 1% sounds like some good fucking radio gold but I get it.  He also used to eat his food n think of shit for the show, but now he just thinks of how to handle all the people involved in this Ellis empire!  There is good news for The Cowboy though, he can train at Bas Rutten’s gym since its only down the road……except that when he n Katie made the trip the night before, it turned out to be about 20 miles down the 101, which in LA at 7:30am means forced anal rape-age so that fucking sucks too.  Well what else can go wrong – then JizzCult enters the studio and you know were all doomed.  Nah, Will’s cool and he brings some new drops – and something for you #EllisFam.  If you live near the studio, or your in town, and wanna be in studio playing games on the show?  Fuck yeah you do shithead – email with the DATE(s) and/or TIME(s) plus your CONTACT INFO and get it up ya!  83140196 So Tom Green saw a drone today and tweeted that shit, which was finally an upside for Ellis since he could sit back and listen to Rawdog n Tully battle it out on why drones are dangerous to our privacy says Josh.  Well, short n sweet, and a criminal investigator and some other conspiracy theory dude who’s got the criminal investigator now looking into him later = Tully Wins (Tully 1 – Rawdog 0).



No Shit!

No Shit!

Gay marriage laws are up for review by The Supreme Court says Rawdog, specifically the Prop 8 one and the Defense of Marriage at which was passed by Bill Fuck Yeah Clinton.  You know what’s not gay, being able to watch Big Fucking Mega Boat The Woodsman on, ON YOUR SMART PHONE!!!!  So remember how Rawdog called out the lack of script for Big Fucking Mega Boat, which Tully said fuck you – Well Tully brought in the “script” for it, and Rawdog immediately started with an apology to Tully, BUT, he also sticks to his guns on not being the producer, only the editor.  Also the go cart track didn’t help much, well it did get everyone there, but then everyone was distracted for some odd reason.  But the script was what was in question, and how about the scene of the Big Fucking Mega Boat with tentacles n testicles, wheres that huh?  No scenes with the BFMB killing any celebrities either or the scene of Jagerbeard shoving a dildo into the rear of BFMB, with Belladonna’s ass as the self destruct button and Muska Kills tagged on the side of the ship. Again though, Rawdog isn’t the producer and the producer is who checks all that shit and makes it happen.  So who was the producer right?  Donald Schultz of course.  Ellis does remember them arguing over who wasn’t the producer, so maybe.  It also didn’t help they couldn’t get cameo’s from such legends like Benji Madden (Another 5 lines that turn into 20 minutes of sweet nothings like in The Woodsman) and Tony Hawk (Another creepy dude with a hat n a moustache like in The Woodsman).  Bottom line is Big Fucking Mega Boat ain’t no Woodsman, but being able to watch it on your iPhone fucking kicks ass.  In closing, Rawdog would like to say if there is another movie involving them all, such as maybe Steve Dead Load or Gory Hole, that he would love to be the producer and would “handle shit” = Rawdog Wins (Rawdog 1 – Tully 1).



Rawdog's doppelganger per Doug Benson

Rawdog’s doppelganger per Doug Benson

Cock News with none other than Doug Benson, good timing Doug, where a San Francisco school figured out about men who go to the ER for penis injuries mostly do from getting it caught in the zipper.  Well Ellis wasn’t satisfied with this version of Cock News, and Doug hasn’t heard the stories yet, so we got to hear about that one time he blue balled a staff hole into his dick, and the other time he ripped his Ronnie Rollback fucking that one chic, Red Dragons!  Tully got his junk caught in the zipper on his PJs when he was like 4 too, didn’t know that huh!  Both were better Cock News for sure but that’s not why we’re here. and his new movie The Greatest Movie Ever Rolled isn’t why we’re here either, but its why Doug is here so check it out!  Were here to play a game with Doug of course, but first lets see what he’s got on the punching machine.  While checking out the board, he knew he had to beat Cumtard’s 40, but wsa threatened by Rob Corddry’s 58, oh and called out Sam Rubin but that turned out to backfire on him as his top score out of 3 punches was a respectable 49, but not enough to beat Rubin.  Hopefully Doug has enough in him to beat The Jason Ellis Show at their own game, kinda based off Doug’s game he plays on his podcast, but with a twist.  Will read off names which were either an Action Stars character name or a Porn Star.  I’m not giving you a detailed play by play, but I will say both Doug nailed the first one by naming the movie too, and Ellis got the first 5 right.  Rawdog n Tully kinda fell behind in the beginning and Doug just kept a solid pace.  Then the Wing fell apart dropping his last 5 and letting the other 3 all pull into a tie for the final question.  Well, the name was Tony Cage and Rawdog knew it a little too well perhaps, and of course was the only one to get it right = Rawdog Wins (Rawdog 2 – Tully 1)!!!



Oddly enough Sly checked in for both categories!

Oddly enough Sly checked in for both categories!


Hollywood News was kinda limited today kids, but Barbara Walters old ass is calling it quits.  They also talked about Justin Bieber spitting on that dude but kinda didn’t give a shit since its so close to Friday n all.  Rawdog did some Teen Advice as well with seniors dating 8th graders and Am I A Lesbian, which just ask yourself 3 simple questions.  Am I Fat?  Do I Wear a Ball Cap?  How Big Are My Calf Muscles?  Again I didn’t pay much attention but this time case I was too busy laughing my ass off at Rawdog give a good 5 minutes of drops, that would fill up at least a page on Ellis’s board, acting like the chics asking this bullshit.  I’m sure we will hear those in the future while listening to The Future.  See what I did there?  Your grandma didn’t see what I did there though, well not after last night’s escapades involving a dart board with a Gory Hole drilled through the bulls eyes swinging from a chain hooked to the ceiling, while she was tied up to the folding chair I keep in my basement with some good ol’ duckie mate, as I did 5 spins around the baseball bat between 5 lines of coke and 2 cialis, and ran full speed targeting your mom’s face hole timed with the swinging board trying to make her tear from gagging the back of her throat.  Well I missed her throat, still got the tears, and came up with a whole new meaning for BullsEYE, OH!