Tag Archives: emilyinSD

Welcome To The Pendarvis Grill & Pub!

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marlboro_soup

Home style cooking!

So obviously there was no show today. And what happens when we’re all bored because our favorite radio show isn’t live? We find a way to stave off boredom, that’s what we do. So I decided it was time to play a game called #PendarvisAndSides The premise? Wll has died and said we could eat him, so people pitched in ideas for ways to eat Will and the sides that could go along with Will. Like a massive Thanksgiving feast with all sorts of food, anything and everything went. This gave me the idea, with all this food, we needed a menu so people could easily choose what they wanted. Thus, the Pendarvis Grill & Pub was spawned. Thanks to everyone who participated, we now have a menu! Let’s check it out.
* Nutrition chart unavailable.

中 Our Menu 中

Lil’ Will Smokies
Will’s fingers & toes smoked until tender and then lightly cooked in a sweet glaze, served with a mixed fruit and Will eye / testicle salad, topped with crushed pecans and cigarette ashes.

Crispy Wills
Will skin chips, lightly salted, with his ball cheese, sweat, & salsa for dipping

Waistline Will
A small portion of baked, boneless, and skinless Will on a bed of rice pilaf and served with green beans almondine.

Pendarvis BLT
Will bacon cooked to perfection with a hint of maple and Marlboro, lettuce, tomato, and mayonnaise, served with sweet potato fries.

Pulled Pendarvis
Slow smoked (in tobacco), hand pulled Will sandwich with chipotle mayonnaise and pickle slices, served with baked beans and cantaloupe.

Slick Willy
Pendarvis confit served with deviled eggs and a pack of your choice from Philip Morris.

Southern Pendarvis
Thick slices of Pendarvis roast served with candied yams and collard greens.

Will Medallions
Will medallions smothered in gravy and topped with melted provolone cheese, served with potatoes au gratin.

Tender Pendar
Fresh cuts of Will dry rubbed and slow smoked for 24 hours, served with mashed potatoes and corn on the cob.

Welfare Will
A generous portion of mac-n-cheese with sliced pieces of all beef Will, served with a deep fried Twinkie.

Rack O’ Pendarvis
A half rack of Pendarvis spare ribs, served with coleslaw and cornbread.

Pendarvis Panini
Tender pieces of Will with an assortment of fresh peppers, onions, melted cheese, and a shiny shin salad.

Alabama Fried Will
Breaded & fried Will breasts, served with mashed potatoes & gravy and a biscuit.

Heil Pendarvis
Willwurst with sour kraut, served on a lightly toasted bun with a dab of spicy mustard.

Smoked Pendarvis
Tender, slow smoked cut of Will meat, served with coleslaw and beans.

Yippee Ki Willay Burger
Will burger cooked to perfection, topped with onion strings, and with your choice of cheese, and condiments, served with onion rings.

Sweet Home Alabama, Will’s Bad Mama Jama
Deep fried Pendarvis shins with crispy onions and home fries.

Pendarvis Plantation Special
Smoked Will hocks served with collard greens.

Fancy Pants Pendarvis
Bacon wrapped 6 or 9 ounce filet of Will, served with roasted garlic mashed potatoes and grilled asparagus.

Hairless Sir Pendarvis
A tender cut of Will sirloin steak, served with chemotherapy.

Sign Your Will
Our famous PenChowder.

Ballpark Pendarvis
Smokey Will dogs topped with crumbled bacon bits, served with potato salad.

Handy Willy
Will’s meaty hands fried to perfection in his own belly fat and served with gravy.

Rise ‘N Regret
Eggs Willy cooked to order, served with hashbrowns, bacon, champaign and orange juice, and a lifetime of regret.

Struck Match
Your choice of Pendarvis and waffles or Pendarvis scrapple with eggs, topped with ketchup and tobacco spit.

中 Desserts 中

Deep fried Twinkie, pecan pie, bread pudding, and cupcakes with brown frosting.

中 Beverages 中

Pepto-Bismol, Iced Tea, Mountain Dew, Mountain Dew, and Mountain Dew.

fuck_you_pie

Try our hair pies! Contains 100% fruit and Pendarvis pubic hair!

Thanks to: @TwistedMetalFab, @shit_toboggan, @emilyinSD, @eastcoasttully, @Cody_McCraw92, @sharkchucker, @mike_in_canada, @J_Chappel, @Truk_Norris, @Scarlet_Kitty, @willfromcowtown, @thegooser, @mighty_boognish, @CrackerStacker6, and of course me, @bitPimps, because I’m an attention whore!

The Jingleberries Will Make You Famous, Or Look Fucktarded (Part 4)

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Remember when The Jingleberries put out a call for recordings? Well, we’re doing a 4th round that we can send off for The Jingleberries to work their magic on, while we sit back and hope it gets played on the air. Like these previous rejoins!

Allegedly Official Awesome Original Shawshank Redemption

Women of EllisFam Rejoin

There was another rejoin that made the cut, but we don’t have a recording of it. If you do, please send it to us!

Round 4

Fuck Your Face (by: emilyinSD)

Welcome Back (by: tank_yanker)

Get The Cock Off Your Chest, Motherfucker (by: tank_yanker)

Urinal Dream (by: AZ_RedDragon)

Testicles (by: serutti)

Get Out (by: sharkchucker)

Sarcastic Moment (by: sharkchucker)

Short Bus (by: sharkchucker)

A Book Story (by: sharkchucker)

Barrel of Monkeys (by: Scarlet_Kitty)

Special Feelings (by: Scarlet_Kitty)

Dirty Barry (by: bitPimps)

Smack Em Yack Em (by: bitPimps)

The Jingleberries Will Make You Famous, Or Look Fucktarded (Part 2)

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Remember when The Jingleberries put out a call for recordings? Well, we’re doing a 2nd round that we can send off for the The Jingleberries to work their magic on, while we sit back and hope it gets played on the air. Like this rejoin @bitPimps re-wrote, @sharkchucker recorded, @Jingleberries mixed, and @EllisMate said “might be the greatest rejoin. Ever, made… ever!”

Shawshank Rejoin (by: sharkchucker)

Allegedly Official Awesome Original Shawshank Redemption (by: Anonymous)

There was another drop of most all of us, but I don’t have a recording of it. If any of you do, please let me know so I can post it here.

Update 3/27/2013: Here’s another rejoin consisting of some of the clips below. Mixed by @Jingleberries, recorded by @emilyinSD, @mrsjessliv, @Scarlet_Kitty, and @bitPimps

Women of EllisFam Rejoin

And now, part 2 of the new recordings…

Shawshank – I Hope (by: sharkchucker)

Handsome Cock Is Live (by: sharkchucker)

Public Service Announcement (by: sharkchucker)

One for the Oil Patch Workers (by: bitPimps)

AIDs Callers Are Out There (by: bitPimps)

Hero (by: bitPimps)

Tanya’s Wet Pussy (by: bitPimps)

Ass Tattoo (by: bitPimps)

Lacey Diddles (by: bitPimps)

RawBot Sex (by: bitPimps)

Tully’s Smart (by: bitPimps)

Ya Hoser (by: thegooser)

Caller (by: thegooser)

Intelligent Conversation (by: thegooser)

EllisMania.com (by: thegooser)

Pooooooop (by: thegooser)

The Real Question (by: thegooser)

Prize Chamber Canadian Version (by: thegooser)

I Am In You (by: thegooser)

The Hole (by: thegooser)

For bitPimps (by: thegooser)

I Don’t Always Touch Myself (by: emilyinSD)

Perfectly Proportioned Cocks (by: emilyinSD)

Rub One Out (by: mrsjessliv)

Snowball the Fuck Out of Those Buttchuggers (by: mrsjessliv)

I Like To Be Stimulated Orally (by: Scarlet_Kitty)

Show Re-cap For Friday 7/13/2012

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Danny O’Donnell vs Alicia Leii

Welp. It’s Friday the 13th, and a lot of you lucky mofo’s are already in Vegas for EllisMania 8. Nobody even invited me. So here I sit, writing a re-cap for your asses, clicking furiously on tweets tagged with #EM8, and getting my box of tissues ready for the bikini contest. But guess what? I lied to you guys again today. But it was a good lie, I swear it! I started shouting out @emilyinSD, @tank_yanker, & @mike_in_canada, claiming it was all of their birthdays. I saw several re-tweets and happy birthday wishes flying. It was glorious! Even though it may not have been their birthdays, just think of how good you made them feel by wishing them one! And guess what, you made my day that much more awesome too by perpetuating my lie! I’ve told you before, I’m a pretty fucked up individual. So see, it wasn’t a bad lie. We got to hear the usual suspects being introduced at the start of the show from Vegas. @DanOD5 turned up as JagerBeard, already drunk and high and sitting on Uncle Mayhem’s lap and semi-chubbed up. And that’s when the real JagerBeard came on the scene to take a large shot of Jager and it sounded like he almost hurled.

Dead Acid Cunt vs Some Hot Readhead in the “Yo Momma Round”

Weigh-ins sounded pretty hysterical with Alicia pushing Dan around and Rawdog telling Ruby that he’s ready to kick her 111 pound ass. Gay Bruediger weighed in at 190 pounds while Ellis weighed in at 198 – let’s just keep in mind that Mayhem was working the scales. Gay started acting a fool almost immediately and ended up threatening to beat up Tully and Rawdog if they played the Jingleberries song about him for his walkout music. There was a quick “Doing stuff with Rawdog” segment, which is always a pleasure to hear and very informative, especially the “how to put on a condom correctly” and “how to insert a tampon correctly” pieces.

Bikini contest winner showing one of her techniques

Rawdog’s go to foreplay move is “necking” and aggressively playing with “titties”, I’m ready for love just typing that shit. The bikini contest was next up on the list of show segments, there were 10 fine ladies who entered the contest and was almost widdled down to 9 after one of the contestants flashed her titties at the crowd. After security talked to her and saw her tits up close, she was allowed to stay and the competition continued. The entire contest was broadcast for free, in streaming HD on Ellismania.com. Shout out to Dead Acid Cunt (@freedrose) for being the runner up and Dead Acid Balls (@hendro9364) for banging that shit!

Your mom’s motto

The remainder of the time was spent with Ellis walking through the crowd taking final calls from fans in the crowd. There were quite a few people who apparently purchased their Wolfknives membership at the show, and they all got their gang names. Mayhem will be debuting his newest career skills tonight as a rapper, and I’m guessing Katie is getting banged in the butt later in the night. And that pretty much wraps up this re-cap, I hope everyone in Vegas for EllisMania 8 is having a great time and staying frosty! I have one last question for you. You know how sometimes when you see really, really, morbidly obese people and you aren’t sure if they’re a man or a woman? Wait, of course you do – you’ve seen your mom lots. OH!

EllisFam Interviews

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I have asked for the EllisFam to do a small 8 question interview so that we may get to know one another and how The Jason Ellis Show has changed or impacted our lives. These are their reply’s, unedited and all in their own words. I hope you enjoy this as much as I do, and thank you to everyone who participated. Without you all this wouldn’t be possible.

Emily (@EmilyinSD)

  1. Where do you live? San Diego, CA
  2. What is your occupation? Paralegal
  3. Tell me a little about yourself. I’m awesome! I love dogs and pot marijuana.
  4. How long have you listened to TJES? 5 1/2 years or so
  5. How did you discover TJES? the punk channel was gone (channel 29) so I was listening to faction and discovered the DJ on a night was freaking hilarious. The music he played sucked, but I kept listening because he was funny and had a hot accent. Then he moved to afternoons and I was hooked.
  6. What keeps you listening to TJES? Tully
  7. Has the show changed or impacted you life in any way? How? The friends I’ve made from listening to TJES are truly the best friends I’ve ever had. The term “ellisfam” is used very loosely these days, but true “ellisfam” know who they are and are some of the most amazing people I’ve ever met and I am honored to know them.
  8. Is there anything else you would like to share? Thanks for everything you do, Jason. You are are gentleman and a scholar. Red Dragons to you sir!

 

Queen of the Fam (@azkellie)

  1. Where do you live? Peoria, Az
  2. What is your occupation? Administrative Assistant to a shit ton of lawyers.
  3. Tell me a little about yourself. Single mom, Scuba diver and scout mother just biding my time in the rat race till i can move to Mexico and dive full time.
  4. How long have you listened to TJES? Whenever it was that BTLS left Sirius. I turned the dial to 41 in the afternoons, and never looked back.
  5. How did you discover TJES? Got tired of the bullshit on H101. see above.
  6. What keeps you listening to TJES? The raw entertainment. I hate anything scripted, censored or dumbed down. I love the off the cuff humor, Tully’s random outbursts and when Jason really and truly laughs wholeheartedly.
  7. Has the show changed or impacted you life in any way? Yes. How? All the people i’ve met and developed friendships with all over the world. The acceptance the fam has to all walks of life, backgrounds, races, and diversity is amazing. It’s too bad the rest of the world doesnt get it like we do.
  8. Is there anything else you would like to share? No. its my ball, you cant have it. But i still love you all with all my heart. :P

If you would like to be apart of the EllisFam Interviews, please contact me (@Az_RedDragon) through twitter and I will send the interview to you.