Show Re-cap For Wednesday 12/12/2012

YNThe Jason Ellis Show is back undoubtedly thanks to Burbank Dave and his ability to be at Jason’a help at a moments notice. Elephants are wrinkly, so are cats, especially when they are hairless and can’t hide their wrinkly ball sack looking skin. Ellis was invited to go to a red carpet event of Disney on Ice with his kids. Nothing cooler than your Dad being interviewed by a bunch of people that think he’s Jason Stathams stunt double. Rawdog claims that he has seen a car flip over during high winds while being blown by Jessica Simpson. There are a number of things that make this story improbable. First only Josh and Burbank Dave have ever seen a car flip due to winds, and second, there is no enough room in Josh’s car for Jessica to be able to properly blow him.Disney on Meth

There’s only one day left to bid on the charity jam they call the Jason Ellis Show Experience. Okay, maybe I just call it that but the current bid is just over 5 grand! Goos job EllisFam. Ever wonder what your baby is worth on the black market? Rawdog took a quicksmells like shit survey from tully and out of 50 fruits and vegetables, he only likes french fries. If anyone was shocked by that please stop reading this, you will never get it. Ezekiel Bread is made with poop. Yup, poop. It used to be made with cow poop but then the people bitched to God about it and because God likes a good joke, told them to use their own poop and they did and God laughed. Its in the Bible, and more importantly its’s on the internet so that makes it true.

Thank you to the ladies for helping out with the “What Do You Think Of These” segment, it sounds like the guys really enjoy it. And if you would also like us here at NoYouAre to give our opinion please CC us a copy, thank you. Panama is making their canal wider which means that they can take a bigger load through their wet passage. And speaking of Panama, segway, a Panama woman got caught smuggling coke in her breast implants. Here’s the Yoko Ono video, and that’s all I need to say about that. Whats left of Nirvana and Paul McCartney are performing together for a charity event and so are Octomom and The Dudesons. And Here’s the Anti-Scientology rap. New Music Tuesday Wednesday was a menagerie of shit featuring Metta World Peace, Cassidy Pope, Big Boy, and some other shitty music that made me want to put sharp objects into my ears.

Hollywood News is brought to you by Anne Hathaway’s pussy. According to some magazine, some chicks are hot, Ricky Martin wishes to come out of the closet again so he can be twice as gay, and Brook Mueller (Charlie Sheen’s ex) is going to rehab, again, for the 19th time. Good luck with this one. The 19th time’s the charm. And then there was final calls where we learned that Australians are just the American version of The Dudesons, drunk and possible retarded. I shouldn’t say mean things like that though. We all thought yer mum was retarded, the way she constantly drooled and slobbered, that is until we realized it’s just all the left over man goo that was seeping out, OH!The Dudesons

 

 

Show Re-cap For Friday 8/10/2012

Led Zeppelin needs to come back, or 80’s glam rock. One of them. Because older women need some shit to listen to and I guess reminisce about. Big, crispy hair, the Brat Pack, it’s all going to bring back memories of when they had a tighter box. Ellis had a couple meetings, some good news, some bad news, some hidden news, some mediocre news, and he can’t talk about any of that shit, so fuck it. It’s Friday. You know Tom Cruise? I mean, not know him, but know who he is? You do, right? He’s that chick that got married to that younger, taller dude? His full name is Thomas Cruise Mapother IV. It looks like Superman IV, and he just might be the Superman of skin care cream. Ellis is talking about getting on more channels, and I don’t care what you say, because that would be awesome like Blossom. Rawdog’s friend “Mr. X” had a question about after he came on his chick, she licked it up, and then wanted to kiss him. Sounds like it was all meant as a silly after sex joke thing, but Mr. X has to put a stop that shit if he don’t want it. Homey don’t play that snowball game.

Anne Hathaway. Tully will accept the fact that you may think she’s pretty, but he will not accept the fact that you may find her sexually attractive. And according to Ellis, she most likely has a smelly ass – he can just tell. And according to me, she’s the type of girl that would snowball her boyfriend as a joke. So it has been said, and now written, and so it shall be. It’s the law of the land. Who wins between a vampire, a predator, a liken, and aliens? Who gives a shit? Some bored dude thinks Google is racist because he thinks one of their Google Doodles depicts a black man running on a watermelon track. That’s fucking ridiculous. Google is racist because they depicted that same black man holding one of the “O”‘s in one Google Doodle, and then the next day that same “O” was missing.

Some chick that battled bulimia, which left her without a gag reflex, was demonstrating how she has no gag reflex and accidentally swallowed a butter knife. What makes this fucking whack is, this isn’t the first time she accidentally swallowed a goddamned knife. Women. Tully’s looking for a good, reliable opiate pill to take – which we all know Rude Jude could hook him up like a rock star – but regardless, as one might imagine, TJES listeners had tons of suggestions. I don’t even remember how this topic got started, but there was a debate on whether you’d rather fight a horse sized duck, or a bunch of duck sized horses. I haven’t started tonight’s pill poppin’ party yet so I can’t give a well thought out answer to that. But what I can give you an answer to is the question your mom is always asking – “hey baby, want some company?” And the answer to that is: Put your hands behind your back and get on your knees, you’re being arrested for prostitution. OH!