So Cullen put together another nice Best of, but that was yesterday. Today is live bitches!!! Yeah so Ellismate’s been sick the past couple of days, he just didn’t want to get Tully and Rawdog sick, I mean fuck Will right? On top of being sick, the Wing also dropped his new iPhone 5 in the pool, Tiggy’s sick too and saying ‘Hell Yeah’, and that of course means the ex ain’t to happy either. But all us fans is happy we got us a live show today, and that we got to hear DavidLeeRothtallica today, stemming from this vocal only track of ol’ Diamond Dave doing Running With The Devil. Ok I was kidding, who gives a fuck about him, back to the show. Tully says Linsanity is officially smarter than a dog while Rawdog has still been going to the gym and says his pecks feel firm, wanna touch? Burger Ellis has been pissing everywhere and eating carpet, yup! And your boy Young Wing not only had a credit card cancelled for some bullshit reason, but he also had to hear some moronic callers swearing you can put a cut onion in a room with you, and it will suck up the aids and gay in the air. Grandma also says you can cut up potatoes and put them in a sock, rock your little potato necklace, and get mad bitches but no herpes. This same tactic is often used by Kayne West, who was caught on tape being a douche bag while Samuel Jackson and Spike Lee were being bigger douche bags, its about 30 seconds in. Oh, and Jay-Z hugged Tully this one time, thats about it.
So what will Rawdog buy Tully and Ellis with his Trust Fund, which is due at age 35? Nothing, he’s Jewish, OH! Just kidding, but seriously the Jingleberries are some bitches (That we love and respect!) for retracting on Rawdog’s shitty beard as man-boy-ly as it may be. Pornhub.com is full of bitches, doing some really cool shit too, and they say these are the 11 days of the year that we ain’t jerking it…using a computer! So remember that special guest Ellis was referring to last week? Yeah well it wasn’t Stupid Tits who was back on the show to preform his infamous impressions. If you’ve never heard of Stupid Tits, he’s a former intern who’s metal as fuck, and if you’ve never heard him do an impression, well you must go back and check this out. Spot on Mitt Romney, Jackie Chan, Jenny Lopez ass and all, James Bond and not the shitty David Craig one either! This dude sent chills down our spines with the likes of Hulk Hogan, Batman while chowing Catwoman’s carnival, Dracula chowing whoevers beave, and of course Rawdog who is the king of eating pussy as we all know. Some hilarious shit here to hear, and a Stupid Tits side note, he’s no longer in All Gods Kill but instead front man for Lazarus Casket, check him out!
So remember that special guest Ellis was referring to last week? Yeah well it was former Metallica bassist, and current shredding ledge, Rock and Roll Hall of Famer Jason Newsted. Honest opinion folks, fucking bad ass interview here and worth every minute of your time. Ellis and Newsted just flipped it back and forth…12 years tomorrow when Newsted left Metallica….Newsted’s proud of Ellis for that shark heart eating incident….no shooting elk at Newsted’s place…Newsted eats left overs….yeah don’t let that last one throw ya, good radio here. Oh, and of course, Unsigned Bands! But this wasn’t any ordinary Unsigned Bands, no this time we had actual advice and help and shit, it was weird! Just a few that we heard from, ‘Teleport’ with that micro penis dude from Vermont, ‘The Wad’ from Puerto Rico or there abouts, ‘Young General’ who’s lawyer sent in the tape, ‘Rusty Hook‘ who’s not that bad, and legends in the unsigned bands game ‘Cuddle Crew‘. Jason Newsted really gave some legitimate advice to these fuckers, and one last band of note, Death!Death!Die!. Yeah Tully slipped in “Pain of Time”, and Jason Newsted gave it honest review, and yes Shoebox the vocals are too low! He did justify why it was low, had to be for the guitar or some
nerdy shit good reason. He also said the singer was pretty good, and the dude on keyboards fucking killed it. Be sure to check out the “Metal” EP and NewstedHeavyMetal.com.
Obama said fuck you to Star Wars! Donald Schultz says fuck you to the blicks, but thats in a best of somewhere. Today was live, and so were the animals Schultz brought in for Ellis ‘Snake Box’ he’s been envisioning. Schultz and his boy Mark, from The Reptile Outlet who came in to help, say a big snake isn’t ideal for this box as they’re too hard to care for. Nah Mate, how about this “friendly spider”? Its a huge tarantula, with 1/2″ fangs which suck out the insides of beetles like slurpee’s. Well picture that in a tank, hanging from the ceiling, with webs inside of skulls and shit, just starring at you with those straws for teeth, and tell me its friendly. Seriously though this thing doesn’t bite humans, just insects and male spiders, fucks them up bad like! No name for our furry friend yet, but its sounds like she will be a huge part of the show to come. I do however have a name for our furry friend who also is huge, and can suck the cum out of anyone with her straw like fangs, its Your Mom, OH!