Ellis hugged a tree today because he forgot to chew his food and god has a grassy hair patch. Also the Pitt Jolie family don’t have a tiger island but it would be pretty fuckin sick. They also talked about their world travels and other important shit about their fascinating life and boobs. Ellis saw some fake ass reality show where this super old lady was with a really young dude. Like he could be her grandson young. I’m really happy that granny is getting good use out of her new hip but does she offer him those soft chalky mints after he gets done chowin her grey granny gash? That probably put a really bad image in your head and a very awkward boner in your pants so here is a picture of Rumor Willis topless in New York. We all cool now?
Quantum Air is an Australian airline and they might remove the life boats from some of their planes to save on fuel. They figure if the plane goes down you’re pretty much fucked anyway. Chris Cole, Street League skater extraordinaire, called in and talked about banging Susan Sarandon and skateboarding. They talked about all the street league tricks like ollie’s, kick flips, rock to fakies, knick knacks, patty whacks, give a dog a bones, 720’s, 540’s, WD-40’s! All kinds of cool ass tricks. If you want to see them just tune in to Fox Sports 1 on Sun June 29. The guys found the Angelina Joli Eathan Hawk sex scene clip so here you go. I’ll wait till you finish madturbating while watching the Hawk get his finger work on.
Mc Skullcap, Shoebox, King Trut, otherwise known as Christian James Hand joined us with superstar Sebastian Bach. Sebastian was in to promote his new show, Sing Your Face Off, and his new record “Give Them He’ll.” Last encounter with Ellis he said Ellis was blasted and just said fuck you over and over then fell down the stairs, and sang along to heaven and hell from the balcony while crying. They talked about drinkin, fuckin, and rock n rollin’ and then played a game. It was an even newer music game from Christian called Who Did They Rip Off. Basically you need to guess who this band ripped off a song from another band.
Ken Block came in to give away some of his remote controlled cars. But you needed to answer a few simple questions first like, what is a hoon and where did the word originate? What does Just Ain’t Care mean? What day is it today? What is Ken Block and Hoonigans always trying to kill? After Ken left and everybody won all the toys Ellis asked the audience what they would do if they were attacked by a bear. Most people said they would go for the eyes and throat but nobody mentioned my plan. It’s pretty simple, first I would start shaking in fear, then shit myself, probably cry, and finally I’d simply bleed. It’s a fool proof plan.
Often times I feel that here at NYA we forget to plug many of the web sites from The Jason Ellis Show and even those from our own writers and EllisFam, so here are some sites you should check out. Hoonigan.com, Beaglefreedomproject.org, Petitions.whitehouse.gov, filteelessnessblog.com, MSPH on riot cast.com, OfficialJasonEllis.com, Nates podcast at journeyintocomics.podbean.com, and the last thing I’d like to plug tonight is yer mum, OH!
o. But what I do know for sure is that he is competing with J to make the worlds greatest onion sandwich! Some of the gourmet ingredients are honey, olive oil, feta cheese, cooked chicken, cool ranch Doritos, and on untoasted bread (thanks Will). The tie breaking decision came from Kevin, he puked less from Jason’s sandwich than Giovanni’s. Maybe next time Giovanni won’t forget the oregano.
eart wandering around. Tully and Christian might do a total fake pro wrestle fight at EM10 complete with luchador masks and folding chairs. Hopefully one of them rips their shirt off before the event. No homo. The “art” that the guys did and put on eBay got over 2 thousand dollars and it’s all going to the Cystic Fibrosis charity. Great job EllisFam! Final Calls were short but there were a few tidbits of information I’d like to pass on to you, Will is a spirit animal, Ellis’s heart ticks came before his anxiety attacks, some dude found out how to do hands free masturbation by flexing his butthole muscle or some shit like that, and this weekend down at the Vetrans Memorial Cemetary yer mum is honoring Memorial Day by felating all the soldiers, and this time she brought her own shovel, OH!
