Thursday is such a cock-tease. It’s so close to the weekend, yet still so far away. Thursday, you bitch. Anyway…BREAKING NEWS! BREAKING NEWS! BREAKING NEWS! LLAMAS ARE ON THE LOOSE IN THE STREETS OF PHOENIX! Continue reading
Hi everybody! It was great seeing you all in Vegas, what a blast we had together! I met so many new faces, we shared laughter, stories, food, and good times. We’ve got a lot to cover today, so let’s just dive right into it, shall we? So today’s show was pre-taped, yesterday, about the events from the day before, but aired on Faction today. Let’s try and do this. It’s really not that hard. We already covered Friday’s live show, but we didn’t get to talk about HATEBEAN’s first and last performance that night, nor the Tiger Box concert later that same night, after HATEBEAN! Only HATEBEAN was live on OfficialJasonEllis.com, Tiger Box however, was not – though I believe it was filmed and will eventually be on the site as well. See? Simple, right? Continue reading
People are finally going to see my face!
It’s Wednesday and I’m in Vegas, listening to and recapping the show. This feels really odd. Anyway, as you know, there was no shows planned for Monday or Tuesday, so today is kind of like a Monday, Dingo is there. Apollo Creed, Kelly Slater, they had sex together. No, I got that wrong. Bald dudes attract older ladies and lot’s of chicks (young & old) have had sex with Kelly Slater. Chicks with thinning hair are hating life, nobody thinks that’s sexy. When Tully was a teenager, he inquired a stylist about getting the hair on his temples dyed gray. He still thinks it’s a good idea, but he’s just going to wait for it to happen naturally because he’s, at most, 5 years away from natural gray temple hair. Hair costs money and Ellis would rock a good wig, but it has to be next level good looking shit. Continue reading
“Hold up! ERRRRRRR! UHH… ARR… ARR! WHAT? C’mon!” ~DMX
Who starts a recap with some DMX speak? This guy! Look, I don’t give it shit if it makes sense or not. You’re missing the point here. It’s DMX, man! Anyway, let’s see what the show has in store for us today and if I hear 1 word in particular, y’all gonna make me lose my mind up in hurr, up in hurr. See what I did there? So what’s the one word I was talking about? “Grammys” If I hear that fuckin word and you’re not talking about your grandmother, I’ll… I don’t know what I’ll do. But you will ALL pay for it, I can promise you that much! Continue reading
That face she makes when you just stick the tip in her butt.
What’s up? Who gives a shit. Here are some words. This recap isn’t over just yet, matter of fact, it just started. Ellis has 4 abs right now, a couple are still hiding – but they’ll come out to play. No flabdominals. Ellis gave a quick line read from the villan in the movie Last Action Hero and Dingo thinks he needs to work on it. If anyone would know, it’d be Dingo, right? It took Tully all of 5 minutes before he started shit talking his son. You gotta love it. If his kid ever hears the show, I assume his son will curse him, thereby locking him in a powerful rage before claiming his life and spreading to his wife. Continue reading