One thing that this site has certainly made itself a beacon for is homosexual rendezvous in truck stops across America. But in our off time, one of my favorite things done here is the interviews. Now, I don’t say “we’ve” done, because I came to start writing for the site just a couple of months ago, but before that I was drawn by the interviews, both with Ellisfam and members of TJES itself. If you are reading this, chances are you filled out a questionnaire put together by @bitPimps or @Az_RedDragon that was later posted on this site. (If you didn’t, and you are interested in doing so, DM your email to @Az_RedDragon with several nude photos of yourself and he will make you a star) If you want to get an idea of the questions, and get to know the rest of Ellisfam, check out these interviews. Some are hysterical, others touching, and some are probably going to be used in court one day. I was going to pick favorites here, but you know what? I’m tired and you can all suck it. Because you are all awesome and you would be great at sucking it of course!

Aside from Ellisfam, somehow this site has managed to land some interviews from the stars of the show and Will Pendarvis. It says a lot about the show and how interactive with the fans they are that they took the time to answer some simple and sometimes insulting questions so that we can all have a laugh outside of 12-4 PST.

Mike Tully gave us the laughs you would typically expect from him and even a Salsa Recipe.

Will Pendarvis gave us a look inside his creepy fucking existence.

Cumtard AKA Kevin Kraft, while no longer with the show, sat down and filled out a questionnaire which was much like any time he was really on the show. Dude took abuse, was open and honest about everything and was even moderately funny at times. Hell, I even asked him when his first attempted suicide was and the dude just rolled with it. Gonna miss that punching bag.

Rawdog filled out probably my favorite of the show interviews, proving that while he is a bumbling moron on the air and can’t defend himself , he can defend himself and formulate a really solid and funny retort. This is what I’ve always suspected with him, because he is such an insecure, nervous type in social situations, but there are some actual thoughts in there believe it or not. So maybe he’s not a radio genius, but I laughed my ass off when I read his replies. Keep plugging away you adorable bastard.

Let us not forget the Jingleberries! The very first to take the bait and regale us with the tales of how the Jingleberries met and came to be, and just how it is they do what they do. Those dude’s are fucking awesome, I won a CD with a bunch of their rejoins and buttons and shit and let me tell you, I really hope that shit doesn’t embed itself in my daughter’s brain when she’s in the car. I’m a terrible parent.

So that’s it! I know there is a really big name I am leaving off this list, and that’s because we’ve never gotten that interview. Maybe one day, but probably not. The Wing has bigger fish to fry, but in the meantime, read up on your fellow Ellisfam and get a little deeper inside your mum the show. Who knows, one of those interviews could lead you to the truck stop that offers the best reacharounds in the Americas!

Welcome to the Wednesday re-cap turd poppers! This is the day where you get your sort of in and out re-cap of TJES mixed with bits of rage because BABIES ARE SO GODDAMNED NEEDY THEY CAN’T LET DADDY GET THEIR WORK DONE. Speaking of fatherhood, Superdad Tully is out sick today, so just Jason and the Dog. Just like the good old days horribly dark days of yore. Let’s just hope it doesn’t end in tongue darting eachother’s mouths again.

A lot of talk right off the bat about how Stern takes a couple days off every week and wondering if it’s because he cares less or not. Hell no, they say, because Stern has been in the game so long, he doesn’t need to work 5 days a week because he’s a pimp. A guy called in to say he started listening to Ellis because of Stern and he thinks O&A ripped off Howard for too long and finds them unbearable. As far as Jason can tell, Stern has been doing this for 30 years and there isn’t much he hasn’t done. So if TJES or O&A end up doing something Stern has done before, they came up with it in their own style and put their own unique twist on it. It’s basically the law of The Simpsons. If you can think of it, the Simpsons did it, so fuck it. I listen to all 3 shows, O&A live, Howard mid-morning and Ellis afternoons, so I never get the lines drawn in the sand with some fans. Each show has it’s own strengths and it’s own Rawdog’s and they are all funny as fuck. Can’t we all just get along?

What happens when we don’t all get along.

Like I said, Tully wasn’t there so we had some early phone calls, one from some alcoholic chick who wanted a kick in the ass to quit drinking but got all whiny and defensive when Ellis tried to help and told her to go to meetings so fuck her. A concerned citizen called in to report a recall on Crystal Geyser water, so shout out to that dude I guess. Things started to get a bit rocky for new producer Dom when the names weren’t showing up on the phone calls, and he kept fucking up for what seemed like the whole show. So Ellis brought him in and berated him a bit on how to give phone calls, and holy shit, am I the only one who thinks Dom is starting to sound a bit like Will Pendarvis? His whole demeanor has shades of Will all over it and if you live in the LA area, beware if a long-haired stroke victim starts following you in his car. More phone calls concerning Wolfknives packages not showing up and TheWolfknives.com not working and this really started pissing Ellis off because his name is on it and people will blame him for it even though the guy couldn’t be further away from operating the shit.

Some 62 year old man was on vacation in Australia and wrestled a shark to save some kids in the ocean. But it gets better, the shark was just lost and got too close to shore, so the old man let the shark survive and released him. Red Dragons to that man. Un-Red Dragons to the asshole company he works for who fired him when the video of him wrestling the shark surfaced online. What type of boring, wimpy motherfuckers would be so threatened by a man wrestling a shark anyway? Oh right, British people. British people also are the founders of racism according to a story Rawdog cited that he read somewhere one time that he sort of remembered so I believe it entirely.

Saying you read it somewhere to a guy who can’t read at all takes a brave man. This man.

Another day, another Mach Madness Riff bracket on the line to find the world’s greatest riff of all time! Today was a motherfucker because all of these songs kick ass and choosing a winner was harder than choosing to get an abortion or not. On that note, I had to change and feed the shit monster during the beginning, but here’s the results.

Rolling Stones- Paint it Black vs. Led Zeppelin- Immigrant Song: Winner: Rolling Stones

Black Sabbath- N.I.B. vs. Led Zeppelin- Black Dog : Winner: Led Zeppelin

Final winner moving on to the next round: Led Zeppelin-Black Dog (Yeeeaaahh Mike Tython ith gonna be tho pumped!)

So like, Mickey Avalon like came on the show and shit and they like talked about how he like gets in fights with bigger like dudes and shit and like this one time he was on stage and these other dudes like got all butt-hurt because he was on stage for too like long or something and holy shit I have to admit I was really wishing the little shit machine wasn’t sleeping so I would have had an excuse to skip this one. Mickey’s a nice guy, and after all, he did play President Queefer Sutherland in Big Fucking Mega Boat, but God damn is the dude hard to listen to. He hangs out at the Viper Room from time to time and performs, so they talked about Tiger Box and came up with a couple good ideas for the show like ripping a hole in your pants before the show so it;s easier for the whores to grab onto your junk and try to rip it off.

Foot Hooker. The term doesn’t get the exposure in today’s society that I think it should. A woman was OH MY GOD I’M GOING TO SELL MY BABY TO SCIENTOLOGISTS. The real story wasn’t that interesting, but it did inspire a caller to call in about the one time she herself had been a Foot Hooker. Originally, she had been hired to stomp on the guy’s balls, but he needed a special table to be able to do it. Problem was, he didn’t have the table for whatever reason, so no ball stomping could be done. Quitting isn’t an option in the Foot Hooker world, so they went to Wal-Mart looking for this table to keep alive this ball stomping dream, but like always, Wal-Mart didn’t have it in stock. So she ended up letting him fuck her feet and shot a load all over them, therefore forever giving her the title of Foot Hooker.

This is what happens when foot fucking goes wrong folks.

Growler News? I guess? Dom got on some gay dating site as a bit for the show, and I guess the idea was for him to read the comments and it was going to be funny, but nothing was printed off and was trying to read it off his phone and the whole thing really pissed Ellis off. Dom fucked up a lot today, and it’s starting to be like Linsanity all over again, so he may get traded to Houston if he keeps this up.

Lion news: Here is where Ellis really started to lose his shit. He tried getting Rawdog to sing an intro, and like most things, Rawdog isn’t good at that. So naturally, Jason yelled at him until he did a slightly less awful version of it. Once we got into the news, there was something about an Illinois senator trying to ban the sale of Lion meat, which apparently is a thing people do. And a couple in Africa were killed by a Lion when they were having sex in the bush. Hey, better a Lion kills me than a slow, painful death from AIDS that I’m sure having sex in Africa earns you anyway.

Look, I’m going to level with you folks, today’s show kind of sucked. Jason was mad, Dom was stumbling, the guest was mediocre and Rawdog was dumb. Maybe calling in sick is Michael Tully’s sadistic way of showing us all how much he is needed on the show. Or he just really needed a day of NyQuil and furious masturbation to recharge his funny tank. Either way, a bad show is better than no show. You can really apply that thinking to just about everything in life. Except for herpes. No herpes is always better than any amount of herpes.

Now be a lad, and go fuck yourself.

It’s Friday, and that means that you do not have to give a fuck about anything. Anything at all. Fiscal cliffs? Fuck em. Filibuster? Never met her. So toss your children to the side, give your spouse two middle fingers and sit down and read my bullshit! FUCK YEAH!

Men in the 50’s used to come home from work and eat a dinner that was ready when they walked through the door (at least it better be ready), smack their wife on the ass (or eye if she burnt dinner) and sit and read the paper whilst smoking a pipe and drinking a scotch. Sounds like one hell of a life if you ask me. There was a common consensus among the two Super-Dads in the room that the whole scenario is pretty Barry damned fucked up. These days, men should forego the days of working overtime and binge drinking and spend more time with their family, which is what most people on their death beds would say unless their last name is Kardashian of course.

The new producer, Dom (@TheHippieDom) has a pierced lip and says it attracts attention to his mouth. I imagine Pendarvis has a hard time making eye contact then and it’s only a matter of time before he starts trying to tickle Dom in the green room. And then Dom will get invited to his first “Prize Chamber Slumber Party.” And then we will never see Dom again. I hope Will can keep his meaty hands to himself because so far, Dom is a sweet ass dude. Get this: The guys started talking about drawing and who would be the better artist. Of course, this snowballed into they should be drawing titties, and those drawings needed real life inspiration. So Jason issued a challenge to Dom, telling him he needed to get them a naked lady they could draw in the next 45 minutes or else he was going to be the model himself. Well I’ll be a son of a bitch if that dude didn’t wrangle up a hot chick who was hanging out around Shade45 and brought her in to a round of applause. No, the guys didn’t start clapping, this chick Tya started making her ass shake, and I have to admit, I was aroused. I’m getting aroused now. This is no longer my hands typing, I have incredible dexterity. So Jason, Tully and Rawdog all drew their depiction of this girl and they all sucked, but Josh’s actually seemed to offend her, so the Titanic method isn’t going to help the Dog get laid anytime soon.

Note: I couldn’t get the pictures of the drawings to save, and I’m not going to try to hard, but check out @ellismate twitter or @wolfmate on instagram.

Did you know it’s International Women’s Day? Well I can’t think of a better way to celebrate than another edition of “Women, Am I Right?” some of the highlights: Some chick got arrested for pulling over on a freeway, stripping down to nothing and screaming “I don’t give a fuck.” Red Dragons to you, ma’am. On the more redneck side of the world, a woman crashed her car into a mobile home while running from the cops, stripped off her pants and tried escaping in a power wheels car. This prompted a bet between Ellis and Rawdog about the upcoming GSP/Diaz fight, and the loser has to drive a power wheels car naked for Ellismania. Looking forward to that. In more WAIR news, a woman got a DUI for driving on the sidewalk and then kicking a cop in the balls. A woman was charged with masturbating with a vibrator while driving(There seems to be a pattern today). And finally woman who was already in prison was charged with squirting her titty milk on a guard, which as everyone knows can pass Hepatitis, AIDS and Cholera to anyone it touches. It’s like a fleshy super soaker filled with disease.

Women, Am I Right?

MMA News: Nick Diaz and GSP are fighting at UFC 158 and there was a press conference call in which Nick Diaz started going off about how GSP is talking so much shit to him that he’s got soccer mom’s telling him on the street they hope GSP kicks his ass. Diaz also said that the people want to see a fight not a wrestling match, which is probably what it’s going to be. GSP can say he’s super dark and he is going to beat him up all he wants, but we all know the only things that will be bruised at the end of the fight are Nick’s thigh and GSP’s pelvis.

MIKE FUCKING TYSON WAS ON THE SHOW TODAY. Another shout out to Dom for hooking that shit up. Iron Mike sat down with the boys and seemed like he was fucked up off of his balls at first. There was a moment there when it seemed like it was gonna go off the rails like the LL Cool J interview but Ellis got it back on track and they talked about life, pigeons, bitches and pathifism. Mike kept busting into an acapella version of Black Dog, and holy shit this man has brain damage.But he does have a one man show he is touring with, and I’ve heard it’s fucking awesome from quite a few people. They talked about how he went to just about everywhere in Australia except Tasmania because those people are kooks. Ellis spent a few minutes trying to get Tyson to tattoo him, but Tyson wasn’t having it, saying he’d give him gangrene and shit. Overall I’d say the interview went well and the guys left a good impression on him.

After the Tyson interview, the chick that came in for the boys to draw came in again with her friend London something or other. I never fully caught her name because Ellis was all over that shit and it started feeling like middle school when you were the only person in the room who wasn’t making out with someone. That never happened to me I’m just saying. Shut up. The chick wanted Ellis’ nuts and it took Sir Michael Tully telling them to get the fuck out for the show to get back on track.

Hollywood News: Bieber is losing his shit. Or not, but he is definitely well on his way to losing his shit. He passed out during a show and is evacuating his vagina all over twitter like puny little Canadian songstresses do. I don’t know, I’m only going to take an interest in Bieber when he is on Celebrity Rehab throwing his feces at Haley Joel Osment over who gets the top bunk. The rest of the Hollywood news was a bunch of BS crap you’ve all heard before and nobody is even reading this anymore. I’ve had a long ass week full of work stress, stress with a 4 month old, and I have to say writing these re-caps has to be one of the coolest things I have ever been a part of. Thanks to @bitpimps and @az_reddragon for allowing me to riff off some bullshit on a radio show that we all love. Being a part of Ellisfam isn’t just about being a fans of a radio show, it’s about the sense of community that comes with it. You are the people that live in my phone, you are the unnervingly honest and friendly people I’ve ever (not actually) met. Red Dragons.

Also, your mother is a whore.

Evening bitches. It’s once again time to re-cap this shit dick business better known as radio. Big Daddy Jas Cakes started off the show talking about how the term “Big Daddy” is inherently creepy and usually dudes who call themselves Big Daddy are therefore creeps. To me, it sounds like the kind of dude who lotions his feet and belly often and eats a lot of Corn Nuts. If you are currently calling yourself Big Daddy and you are nobody’s Daddy and are shorter than Lebron James, please discontinue use of the term.

The only acceptable use of Big Daddy is if you have a drill on arm.

Moving on, Jason is gearing up for the Tiger Box event,(March 15th at the Viper Room if you want to go sing karaoke with Jason)practicing his guitar licks, by slamming through the beginning of “Am I Evil.” He progressively got better as he continued and it was almost starting to sound like a song. Remember though, you are going to want to buy tickets to this thing in advance or you may not get in at all because this is the Viper Room, River Phoenix died here. Swanky joint.

How hairy are you? Do you trim the hair? Do you trim the right hair? Are you protected from the sun’s rays and is God mad at you for making your junk look like Kid n’ Play? There was a pretty lively discussion on body hair today and it was surprisingly interesting considering we had the hairless wonder Jason, the mildly fuzzy Tully and Cousin It’s Jewish nephew Josh. Basically, if you’ve got established hair in a place, it might be ok, but if you’ve got patchy hair that looks like you superglued whatever you found around the toilet, shave it. Ellis is still going to therapy and everyone is a work in progress and you will find your own way and I’ll let Enigma take it from here. Jude came in for half a second to talk about doing TV shows and Ellis said he’d want to do a show with either Jude or Psycho Mike. I’d rather see Jude on TV talking about taking Ketamine and watching Gone With the Wind personally, but to each his own. Let’s hope we get some sort of TV show in the near future. After that they brought up skateboarding and how if Ellis was 20 years younger his pool would be emptied out and he’d be shredding that shit up daily and tell the landlord to suck it.

SHARK NEWS: A man in New Zealand was attacked by not one, but 3 fucking sharks which is a shitty way to go out. Jason says he should have had a samurai sword strapped to his back so he could have just whipped it out and SHAKOW stab that motherfucker in the head. Rawdog said he should have played mind games with the shark and psyched him out. Tully prefers razorblades on your fins when swimming which is also a gangster way to win at water polo. If the fins don’t work though, you can always use an underwater flamethrower on the shark because even if you don’t understand fire, you fear it.

Spiderman is reportedly cumming on women or at least throwing his loads on Wal-Mart shoppers. This has been the second rash of incidents involving the ejaculatory assassin, the first occurring three years ago. Which means one of two things: 1) Either his thirst has returned or 2) he just switches to K-Mart in the off season and nobody cares about K-Mart shoppers. Cialis and Viagra should probably be avoided unless you get them prescribed, because a couple of dudes called in, one saying he passed out during sex and got a bloody nose (red dragons) and another said he had a stroke mid load. Stroke load, or Maneurysm, if you will. (red dragons) So unless you are an old man who’s shit doesn’t work anymore or you need to stab a shark in the eye, take it easy on the boner pills.

Next up, we got to see Will angry. And Will angry is pretty fuckin’ funny I gotta say. Apparently Sebastian Bach was supposed to make an appearance today, but cancelled last night and appeared on the Frosty/Frank (I have no idea) morning show. Ol’ Pendarvis went on a rant about how it pissed him off that someone would cancel an appearance when they are in the same city, the shows are on at different times, and the one he picked is a step up from a shitty podcast. The whole rant was pretty damn funny and I think they should fake guests cancelling on them sometime just to get Will pissed off again.

Cumtard had some stupid idea to headbutt the punching machine and Ellis punished him by smashing him in the head with it. After Cumtard was sufficiently punished, it was time to get some clits off of boxes. First off we had a girl who just couldn’t be satisfied, first by a guy who just wanted her to bounce like a pogo stick on him but she doesn’t like that so HAHA guy she banged! She also told a story about how she had a threesome and the guys just didn’t know how to do it right. It sounded like a chick who couldn’t be pleased until she said the dudes were high-fiving whilst inside her which tells me these dudes were probably making eye contact too and that is a 3-way no no boys and girls. After that there were more stories about dude’s cumming when they shouldn’t and the usual business. THat all changed when a chick called in saying she was dating some metal dude and found out he had been banging eight other chicks and a guy who may or may not have AIDS. I’m not sure if that makes him more metal or not, but there you go. Some mush-mouth 19 year old called in and said something about dude’s cumming and a threesome but I couldn’t understand a fucking thing she said so fuck her. A couple of 19 year olds called in and I’m starting to wonder exactly what the fuck? This doesn’t seem like the type of show 19 year old girls would be into right? And if it is, then what the fuck does it say about me, writing this recap, and YOU for reading what some asshole has to say about the show? I’m going to go the denial route and just assume they are listening because they want to bang Rawdog because Jewish boys are big with the young ladies. What? They aren’t? Then I don’t know what to make of it, I’m gonna go chug a beer and listen to some Motorhead.

“Hey, can I talk to Ellis?” Final calls was another success, and I’m loving this new dynamic of just having Ellis in studio riffing one on one with the fans. There is a lot less tangents to go off on late in the show and you don’t feel like you are losing anything if time runs out or if Rawdog tries defending his diet for the last 15 minutes. So, Jason, even though you can’t read, and even if you could, you wouldn’t be reading this shit: Keep it up man, it’s a great note to go out on. What we got from the last half hour today was you have to get up in your asshole and get it clean if you want to be able to go to the bar and pick up chicks. And when you do go to the bar and pick up chicks, aim low and you’ll always go home with a satisfied penis. Fingering in the ass is OK, and you should pee on people more often. OH YEAH! Earlier in the show, Ellis told everyone how Katie wanted him to cum on her burger so she could eat it. He couldn’t get the job done though because he had UFC and all this other shit going on. Can’t believe I almost forgot cum burger. Wouldn’t have ever lived that one down I don’t think. Cum burger sounds like it should have a whole section on Youporn. Like maybe when a chick sits with so much load on her face for a really long time, and it festers and rots onto her skin, and then some euro dude comes and rips all of it off in one clean peel, her face would look like hamburger with all the sores and craters. Just a thought. Get on it Germany!

Happy Wednesday fuckers! Do you got rage in you? Snooki Ellis might, she beat up a boy her age at school and Ellis thinks he may have passed on a “dumb and angry gene” to her on account of her struggles she has had with school like he did. He says he knows that’s not really true, but he is going to meet with her therapist and there are some things he needs to work out with his ex to work on Snook’s issues. It’s pretty common with kids who have divorced parents at that age, and either way, the Ellis’ will work it out.

Do you like soup? Of course you do, who doesn’t? I’ll give you three guesses as to which person on the show is not a soup guy. Oh wow, you got it right on the first one, yes, Rawdog does not like soup (Unless it’s Matzos Ball soup OF COURSE)  and thinks cheese in soup is a weird concept. I don’t know why anyone is ever surprised at this shit anymore but holy shit, cheese on soup is god damned amazing. Then, Tully told Rawdog about cheese soup and it blew his fucking mind. One of these days they need to get some cheese soup into the studio and have him try it. Maybe if they made chicken nugget cheese soup he’d like it. Holy shit balls chicken nugget cheese soup sounds amazing. We may be onto something there. Jason apologized to Rawdog for skipping over Disturbed on NMT, saying he needs to broaden his horizons musically, and try new things if he is going to lecture Rawdog on foods he should try. I say that is bullshit, because Rawdog may stumble into liking a vegetable, but even vegetables hate Disturbed.

Tully brought up a recent study that reported that the majority of people’s first time having sex set the tone for their sex life forever. This spawned what could be a great new segment: How did you lose your virginity? Tully said he took forever to bust a nut the first time, which explains why he is such a sexual champion. Ellis’ was a little more depressing as we all know, but Twitter and the callers brought out quite a few gem. Some chick called in to say she lost her virginity in a movie theater. What movie was the backdrop to her deflowering you ask? The Rugrats Movie. Yeah. So if the theory is true, that chick dresses dudes up like Reptar and has them chase her around while she’s wearing a diaper. Sleep well with that image tonight kiddies. Another guy called in and said his first time was with a 40-something lady while her 48-year-old husband watched and jerked it in the corner. Yeah, shit’s dark. What could make that a little worse? He was the paperboy. All in all, I hope they bring this back as a permanent segment, because the Ellisfam has some serious doozies. All the talk about deflowering got the guys talking about how easy it seems the kids are getting BJ’s these days, and how it was almost unheard of when they were growing up. Ellis thinks it’s the explosion of porn in the world. I think it’s because your Mom’s been volunteering as a counselor for summer camps across the country. OH!

The return of Doing Stuff With Rawdog, and we have to get this man a TV show. I mean, is there anything this man boy can do? But oh man did we learn some shit today. Did you know soup is basically just water with some other shit thrown in and heated up in the microwave? Blew my mind. If you like Italian wedding soup, just wait for the Mafia Don’s daughter to get hitched, drop a net over the top of the ceremony, drop the net into a soup pot and maintain a rolling boil for 4-6 hours. Oh right, nets! If you have a mole problem, just stick a hose inside the mole hole(Bong Bon) and flush the little bastard out and wait to spring your net over him and Bob’s your uncle. Inserting a catheter may be easier than previously thought, unless the dude is screaming his balls off, in which case you just drug the bastard and jam that tube up the pee hole while he is out. Also, if you have to deliver a baby, drug that bitch and let the little mongrel slide out of there like it’s Magic Mountain. Jumping a car is easy peasy as well, you just have to make sure to listen for the little *bzzz* sound that lets you know the car is charging. You know, sort of like in Super Mario Brothers when you hit the blocks and if you hear the little *bling* sound you know there’s a coin in there. If you’re in a strange town and you need to get your party on, find a 2-star hotel and ask the concierge (Seriously he said concierge for a 2-star hotel) and ask him where the party is. I laughed for half a second before realizing you probably could get some meth at a couple of the shit houses where I live. Hell you could probably get it at Wal-Mart where I live. Having trouble coming down off of your room serviced cocaine? Take some downers and level that biological see-saw out. Coming out of a heroin bender? Drink a Red Bull. It’s that simple when you ask the Dog boy’s and girls.

Hollywood news was up next, and it was a lot of Hollywood types doing Hollywood things. You know, building houses made of Gluten-Free, Organic, Non-GMO Porsches and such. There are rumors that a relatively unknown singer who sounds like Britney Spears may have sung some of her songs for her when she was too busy making sandcastles in the crazy box. Ellis’ didn’t think she sounded like Britney, but she sounded like a dead ringer for me. I couldn’t find the video because I couldn’t remember the chick’s name but if you are interested in hearing it, you can research it you big ol’ sack of gayyyyyyyy. The guys ultimately decided that if you are shocked whenever you hear something from Hollywood was fake, you may require a helmet to keep you licking the windows on the outside of a moving bus. Look’s like the powers that be at Kellogg’s may have gotten the jump on Ellis and Corey Taylor for the Slipknot Cereal. There was a recall on a certain type of Special K with pieces of glass in it.  So even Kellogg’s thinks shitting blood is metal and kids these days need to get started early. And hey, if you’re fat and you did eat this glass cereal, wipe the shit out with the freedom wand fatty!

Ellis decided to end the show a bit differently today, dismissing Tully and Josh and doing the last half hour of the show by himself. A ballsy move in my opinion with how shitty the callers have been, but I was wrong! The old man’s still got it and seemed to fall back into answering calls and talking to himself like he used to do. Of course, some dumb asses still called in asking to speak to Jason, and I hope each and every one drove into a guard rail once Jason hung up on them. Let’s make a sweeping rule: Don’t ever ask for Jason OK? If Mickey Mouse answers the phone, you can still drone on about how much you like the show, because we never get tired of hearing that of course. Apparently, Howard Stern mentioned something about not thinking Jason’s head tattoo was real. I didn’t hear the clip but I can’t imagine Howard would doubt that the man that is covered in ink would let the piece of bare skin God took away from him go to waste. Either way, Ellis doesn’t care what anyone thinks and they should all fuck off. And as far as fucking off goes, I think you should do the same, because that was about it for the show today. I got a little lazy today and didn’t put any pictures with the post so you illiterate bastards who just scroll through to laugh at the pictures were shit out of luck. Hey, you should feel happy you got this far without going all Mongo Smash on the inter web machine you water-headed mongoloid.