Show Re-cap For Thursday 8/9/2012

Whats up                                            thanks for coming back             funny as hell                      this one time I                                           then I told yer mum                                 funkin hell mother of a cunt                                    on the show today.                                      WILLLLL what about the government                                                  WILLLLLLL the radio is fucked up                                             That’s how the beginning of the show was, exciting shit right there. But as always, shit got fixed and everything got back on schedule. Right after shit got straight the guys mentioned a clip of a cam girl that Sir Bit Pimpington the Third sent them. She apparently broke down and started crying, but why let me tell you what happened when you can see it for yourself. For a brief moment there was a bit of good news admist all the futardedry, no callers. At least for a little while until Will and the Government fixed that too. Rawdog is apparently a slayer of rats, and accompanying him is Tully the Conqueror. But Rawdog the great had to get his roomie to get the rat out of the trap, Man Card suspended.

Chicks with scars are hot!

Another dude sent Ellis a video of a sick burnout, but I couldn’t find the link so I give you this instead. Creepy. Bloomin Onions aren’t Australian and fat people love them because they’re fat and they’re fat because they love Bloomin Onions. And lifes circle continues. Travis Pastrana (@TravisPastrana) and Jolene Van Vugt (@JoleneNitroGirl). Jolene talked about all the cool shit that most men don’t have the balls to do and how many times she’s been knocked the fuck out. After a little while Travis started talking and it seemed much less interesting, or sexy. But the main point is to check out Nitro Circus 3D, not featuring Andy Bell.

Is this where the bad man touched you?

I got really busy at work doing work like shit and the next thing I know is that I heard some dude was chowing beav on horse. After I cleaned up the mess that was once my lunch I heard a woman got strip searched on the side of the road. This bitch must have been up to some really shady shit because the officer even felt it necessary to “pull the plug.” After such a great story about how our officers are protecting the public from PMSing road raging bitches, they played Ellis Jeopardy. Again, Tuberculosis’s name was on the line and once again, he lost. Ladies and Gentalmen, please welcome Chad Kreuger infant holocaust.

I know you looked at their titty too, don’t deny it.

The community should start teaching the homeless people jui jitsu, one new move every day. Then they can protect us, or rob us easier. But it would still be trippy to see The Bag Lady put some dude in an arm bar for a sandwich. The rest of the show was mainly discussing the woman with two heads, actually the women with one body. Most importantly the public would like to know, if they fart who do you blame it on? Do they give great BJ’s? If you fuck them is it technically a threesome? Do they both get an O face? What if one wants anal and the other doesn’t? I think that these girls need to get their collective ass onto the show so that we may get answers. But either way, these girls still can’t suck more dicks at the same time as yer mum, OH!

Childrens Hospital talk – 1/9-1/10/12

Tonight is the night if you want to see Ellis on ‘Childrens Hospital’ (Midnight on Adult Swim/Cartoon Network). To tune up, listen back to the guys talking about the show, both before and after Ellis performed.

Learning lines for ‘Childrens Hospital’ – 1/9/12

Download (link to MP3)

After acting on ‘Childrens Hospital’ – 1/10/12

Download (link to MP3)

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Bonus: The Malin Akerman interview and ass tattoo with Grant Cobb – 2/9/12

Download (link to MP3)

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EllisFam Interviews

 

I have asked for the EllisFam to do a small 8 question interview so that we may get to know one another and how The Jason Ellis Show has changed or impacted our lives. These are their reply’s, unedited and all in their own words. I hope you enjoy this as much as I do, and thank you to everyone who participated. Without you all this wouldn’t be possible.

JERRY TUCKER (@CRAZYJERR)

 

  1. Where do you live? Fort Collins Colorado I Have Family Ties In Kansas City, Wichita
  2. What is your occupation? I am a ASE Master Tech and I Certify Used Cars at a Honda,GM,Buick Dealer I Love My Job and they take great care of me. About 55 hours a week I also maitnence a Fleet of 8 Semi’s and 12 trailers and wash Trucks on weekend usually 15 hour’s a week After Both Jobs I stay Busy Building my own Buisnesses: I’m a Mobil DJ,I dj Events and Weddings, – use Virtual DJ,Hercules RMX controller, Behearing Mixer’s & Speakers. I’m Very addicted to my DJ Lighting I Also Run Sound For A Local Rock Band and I bring all the Lighting for there Gigs Usually One A Month Northern Colorado and Denver Area Gigs, I Get Paid to Learn the art of Live Mixing and Large PA systems. I get real Hands on experience with my DJ gear between there sets I keep the Music going reading crowd to practice the Craft of DJ’ing I run My Woodworking>Metal Fab Shop which provides me with Free Therapy to keep my mind right. I love to create stuff and it usually brings me piece of mind>Currently My Shop is Focusing and research and development on 2 Separate Model Drifting Trikes have a Marketing Plan and under Contract with a Local Shop to sell Trikes out of and Online as well.  I also have a New Line Of Custom Pic Frames I’ve been designing and Setting shop up to assembly line production once I get all my Gigs Built After all that work is done I work the Concerts and do some Gorilla Style Filming of Bands. I do Interviews with Bands Hip Hop, Punk Rock, Even country. I put Videos On CrazyJerr.com and also I do a lot of filming and keep working on Video Production. This is a very fun Part of CrazyJerr and the Dot Com. I don’t get Paid but I do create Contacts in the Music Business and have artists Contact Me to Film or help set up there events. I also Get on Guest Lists which equal Free Shows and Piles of Free Cd’s and Free Shirts Keeping My Closet Full so all in all with Merch and Tickets I do get paid but really enjoy the Journey
  3. Tell me a little about yourself. I’m Crazy I always Push my self to learn new things. If I watch TV its usually a documentary and I’m studying how they film so I can emulate there style and add my own to my own Documentary I’m filming. As I interview artists I have random questions that throws people off. I’m Just Collecting data for long term projects I’m working on. I Love to Ride Mountain Bikes Usually ride a 5 Mile Loop In hills on lunch. I also Love riding Jump Bikes I have a Pump Track In Back Yard that one day as I dial it in and practice I would like to Ride it like a Pro Google ( MarkWier Pump Track ) I Love Santa Cruz,Older GT Bikes My Jump Bike is a KHS. I snow Board, Love Moto, Rodeo, write Poems …Ding…naw it really goes well with ladies once again a slight bit gay which does work A Girl will not feel threatened by you if you seem a slight bit gay and if played right GOAL. I Have One 12 year Old Son who I have Sunday Night Till Thur am that’s when I chill and rest and enjoy our time together
  4. How long have you listened to TJES? Been Listinging to Ellis Since about Early 2008
  5. How did you discover TJES? Flipping Channels and found Faction then was like who is this off the wall assie and rolled with show
  6. What keeps you listening to TJES? Basically for me I listen to show at works cause it takes my mind off the day to day and keeps me entertained therefore while working I’m entertained. I don’t really take time to critic show cause it does its job for me takes my mind off long days working.
  7. Has the show changed or impacted you life in any way? How? Show has Changed my life cause I used to send in random Audio Clips and they would play them and love them just opened new doors and I took time to look threw the doors and find new opportunities that have been very Fulfilling. I got Rocked in EM2 volunteered to fight when other fighters did not show up. Lost 8 hours of memory once I came back to the world I found my car and when I opened my trunk I thought I robbed Ellis cause I had stacks of shirts,sweatshirts and the oG Carbon Fiber Red Dragon Chain that Rizzo Made him. Did not realize he gave me all that cause I was very confused or walking talking Blacked Out I Have Made it to EM2,4,5,6,7 and will be at EM8 I don’t get into EllisFam Politics I could Give 2 shits on who is EllisFam OG or who is New. If ur a Ellis Fan and treat me with respect then right back at you if ur Ellis Fan that disrepects me then I know I affected them in a way and I ignore them and win. I Have Learned to Ignore Hatfull coments from the interwebs cause when u put Content online people see it and if it afects them positive or negitive they leave a Comment and I’m not gonna lie I usually ignore comments cause I live a Positive Life and don’t need to deal with Negitifity.
  8. Is there anything else you would like to share? If you Do right by People Right things will happen. I stay Positive and I really enjoy helping the right People. I am a real nice guy and give people a hand Up and when they take a Hand Out I Kick Back with a Smile From Ear To Ear as I watch everything in there life go wrong I don’t even have to do anything that’s all Karma and I believe. If You did read all this thank you for your Time. As for me having short answers to anything its just not gonna happen my mind is on a race and just won’t stop. In Closing my Fav quete is from Glasses Malone Song “I’m Married to my Grind if girl walks up I repectfully decline cause cheating puts my marrage on the line” right now I’m very driven by my own goals and been leaving girls along cause all the ones I find bring noise to my head….I Love and Live this life makinga a difference everyday I’ve Paid Dues and it just keep getting easier. Thank You for ur time Crazyjerr and The Dot Com salutes all of you

Jen Tipping (@Jen_E_Tipping)

  1. Where do you live? Orange County, CA
  2. What is your occupation? Labor & Delivery RN.
  3. Tell me a little about yourself. I’m super gullible. Great, now you guys are going to fuck with me.
  4. How long have you listened to TJES? About 2 years.
  5. How did you discover TJES? I bought a care with satellite radio.
  6. What keeps you listening to TJES? The humor and most of all the Ellisfam!
  7. Has the show changed or impacted you life in any way? How? I have met some super awesome people from all over the country and even out of the country. I’d never have met them if it weren’t for the show!
  8. Is there anything else you would like to share? I can’t wait to meet more of the fam this Friday!

 

If you would like to be apart of the EllisFam Interviews, please contact me (@Az_RedDragon) through twitter and I will send the interview to you.

 

Show Re-cap For Wednesday 8/8/2012

Holy fuckin hell it’s been a long time since I talked to you beautiful people. Where has the time gone, it’s like the sequel to your favorite movie. I don’t know where I’m going with this and to be honest, I’m a bit buzzed. Ahh, ‘ol times. Does your lady shit? If she does then she might also stand to pee. According to Ellis anyhow. We started off with proper poop etiquette and the survey says, courtesy flush. Basic rules for pooping are act like your not pooping, unless your doing an upper decker, then let the sweet smell of freedom ring. Some dude from TMZ recognized Ellis, check that off the bucket list. Who is a sore loser? Gabe is a sore loser, clap clap clapclapclap. He posted on his blog, http://www.gabegodzilla.com, that the fight was fucked up or something and that he didn’t get a fair chance and that there was sand in his vagina and his panties were in a bunch. I saw the fight just like many of you and this dude got knocked out like a sorority girl at a frat party, and then humped just the same. On the funnier side, Uncle Mayhem is trying his hand at stand up comedy. This shall be fun. Go to something something dot com to find out more info.

In Olympic News, DICK PUNCH!!! That is all. The guys came up with an idea for designer condoms and the ideas were flowing. I think the unanimous winner was the guy who suggested a condom that looked like a knife so you can bang your chick on her rag and it would look way less disgusting. Shout out to you, you Red Wing earning mother fucker! RawDog thinks he can shave his own beard and the only thing that i could think of is that this needs to be recorded to show the world that Josh really knows how to do something.

I am done laughing now so lets continue. In some places you cannot get a DUI while being on horseback, but here in Arizona, you can. Trust me. Super Jews made beer goggles to wear, however I still prefer the old fashioned method of just getting sloppy piss drunk. Rob Coddry was in The Swinghouse and talked about childrens, hospitals, coke, Jason Ellis’s third acting debut, speed dating, and the teradactle (however the fuck you spell it). Ellis will be on Childerens Hospital tomorrow night at midnight. Not tonight, tomorrow, before the day after, but before the other day on Cartoon Network or Adult Swim, or both. Are we clear? Good.

In Wicked Awesome Naked Celebrity News, Randy Travis was kickin ass and raisin hell in Texas. Who says that country music is all sad and shit. That sounds like a great fuckin time! Its just too bad we don’t have a pic of his sweet ride. I bet it’s a T-Top so that mullet can flow in the wind. Some dude made ultimate arm wrestling and it sounds like a pile of ultimate shit. Finals calls were not one to disappoint, and by that I mean  they were window licking, diaper wearing, short bus riding “special” folk. The last thing I recall was a dude wants to jack Jason off for some roids (don’t do drugs kids) and Chris Angel has mind lube. I heard yer mum tried steroids, she got so big that a team of mules had to tie her down, just before she let them have their way with her, OH!

EllisFam Interviews

I have asked for the EllisFam to do a small 8 question interview so that we may get to know one another and how The Jason Ellis Show has changed or impacted our lives. These are their reply’s, unedited and all in their own words. I hope you enjoy this as much as I do, and thank you to everyone who participated. Without you all this wouldn’t be possible.

REDJAMMIES!! (@RedJammieGirl)

  1. Where do you live? Living in your moms fishtank!! Omemee, Ontario, Canada
  2. What is your occupation? Delivering all the shit you order online and are never home to sign for!
  3. Tell me a little about yourself. I am what I tweet! Honest, loyal, hard working, down to earth, simple Canadian Girl who’d rather get her hands dirty than polish up my fingernails. Here’s the shocker for those that don’t know, I am a single Mom of a 15 yr old daughter who is the best child in this world! Everything I do, I do in order to provide for her and myself and will always do whatever I have to do to survive. I am a soldier…I will march on. 
  4. How long have you listened to TJES?
  5. How did you discover TJES? First started listening to the show when my ex fiance purchased satellite radio as his Christmas present from me and I haven’t heard way as many shows as any of you, so fanwise, ya, I suck. One day I will get satellite radio because the french stations and bullcrap 80’s music that plays makes me want to stab myself in the throat, so I listen to nothing instead. #SadPanda
  6. What keeps you listening to TJES?
  7. Has the show changed or impacted you life in any way? How? So, has the show changed me? One word. #EllisFam.  With that one word….Thank you!!
    There’s so many of you that have had my back, that have supported me, that have made me laugh, and have helped me in anyway.
    Alex @shit_toboggan , you are what every woman hopes to find, and because of the show, you are in my life #TeamShittoboggan
    Bill @tank_yanker there’s so much I am in gratitude for. I will #Shoutout you forever because you are that amazing my #BeadyEyedCanadian friend. 
  8. Is there anything else you would like to share? Okay, enough of the sap…that’s gay….lets go do a #CumChallenge instead. GO!!!!

PICS OR IT DIDN’T HAPPEN!!!

RC (@notchhillbilly)

  1. Where do you live? Sorrento British columbia
  2. What is your occupation? Logger. volunteer firefighter
  3. Tell me a little about yourself. I’m 24 years old a small town farmboy. I married my best friends little sister who promptly gained a ton of weight she said its cause she’s pregnant but I dunno…
  4. How long have you listened to TJES? Five years four of them religiously.
  5. How did you discover TJES? The wild world of spike first, then he was one of BTLSs guests and had an awesome interview. When bubba stopped being live I made the switch and I’ve been hooked ever since.
  6. What keeps you listening to TJES? Tully tearing into rawdog is great. 
  7. Has the show changed or impacted you life in any way? How? I truly feel like they’re family I felt so bad when he got divorced I told my wife over dinner haha.
  8. Is there anything else you would like to share? I’ll gladly deal with all the shitty callers for the absolute gems that get through. Especially the marlins fight song guys gets me every time haha RED DRAGONS!!!

 

If you would like to be apart of the EllisFam Interviews, please contact me (@Az_RedDragon) through twitter and I will send the interview to you.