Show Re-cap For Friday 3/9/2012

It’s Friday, why are you giving a fuck (or a fart)? Oh, you’re not? That’s excellent news! Guess who else wasn’t giving a fuck today? Ellis. He was late for this, the final Friday morning show, apparently when the guys tried calling him it would go straight to voicemail. Turns out neither of his alarms went off so he overslept. Oddly, it used to be Tully who was always running late, my how the tables have turned. So for the first part of today, we got the RawTully Center Show, which wasn’t bad at all, actually it was entertaining – I don’t think those guys give themselves enough credit when it comes to filling in on the show. It was also revealed that Tully’s middle name is Leonard! How fantastic is that? I can’t help but think of when @oxycottonjohn called in, “Yea, this is Leonard and I like to go muddin”. I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of that line.

Tully unveiled his brand new segment today, “Women, Am I Right?” after reading a story that Bin Laden may have been betrayed by his jealous “other” wife. We all know women are inferior, wretched creatures that are not to be trusted so this segment should have plenty of material at its disposal. Disclaimer: It’s a joke ladies. Don Squartz jumped from a hot air balloon while on the radio – that sounded uh… fast or something. As you know, South African Don is a racist, he hired a bunch of blicks to cushion his fall after jumping from like 2200 feet or some crazy shit.

Jim Florentine came on the show and Ellis re-shared all the relatively recent developments in his life. Learning his father molested him, getting a divorce, drinking, and all those things he’s currently coping with. It’s amazing to hear it all and you can tell it still hurts him. I suppose it helps him to talk about it, but it is surprising someone could be so open to tell all this to the radio universe. Florentine had his own stories, such as at the age of fourteen, kissing a wrestling photographer on the cheeks for wrestling pictures. Fucking creepy people are out there in this world, we all know this, but it’s always surprising to hear.

BOOM! Done. See how I did that? Got in, did my shit and then got out. Exactly how your mom is treated, sexually I mean. What I’m saying is, a lot of individuals see your mom, fuck her and finish, and then leave. OH?

Show Re-cap For Tuesday 2/21/2012

According to Ellis and Rawdog, Cumtard is in fact leaving the show – unless maybe if Sirius XM can pay him more money. He said he can’t afford to live on a part-time wage (understandable) so he has to go get a full-time job some place to pay the bills. So look out for Scrotum McBoner Fart at your local sex shop or grocery store. This may be good and/or bad news. Cumtard has taken a his fair share of shit from both fans and the cast during his time producing the show, some with good reason and others with malice. The good part, Tully and Rawdog are going to have to help produce the show in the interim, and both of them are certainly more than competent to do so. The bad part is, believe it or not, Cumtard did bring some things to the show that really helped. I wish him nothing but the best and hopefully he is able to return in some capacity, he deserves his shot. Anyway, fuck that guy. (insert laugh track)

So today is Rude Judesday (@rude_jude), he was partying hard snortin’ lines of katemine last night, so much so that he hurled. Dude parties like a fuckin’ rock star and has the best drug fueled stories. I swear sometimes that dude sounds like a hip hop @oxycottonjohn, it’s fucking hilarious. Jude brought up how he would love to bang Sandra Bullock, Ellis got kind of got oddly silent for a second – that seemed kind of funny, make your own presumptions about that.

Rawdog went out on a date this weekend with some chick he wasn’t attracted to after seeing her in person (i.e. a fat chick) He thought she was cool and wants to hang out with her as friends, but doesn’t want to ever have a sexual relationship with her. So basically Rawdog friendzoned this chick, which is awesome because usually it’s him that’s been friendzoned.

Big Fucking Mega-BoatDonald Schultz stopped by the show and there was more talk about making the movie “Big Fucking Mega-Boat”. They were talking about celebrity cameos as well, many names were mentioned as well as many one-liners. The Twitter ledge @mike_in_canada came up with a hashtag (#CelebrityCameo) for possible one-liners that different celebrities making cameos in the film could use. Sounds like they’re getting pretty serious about filming this and hope to have it completed sometime in May I believe.

And that does it. I better stop and try to get this posted. My Internet has been going down more than your mom on freebie blowjob day. That’s still on everyday right?

Mayhem Mondays! – June 2010 (History)

The boys are off for Presidents Day and there is another “Best of” show. Boring!

It’s Monday, Jason “Mayhem” Miller will be returning to the UFC on May 26th, and he just tweeted to J.Ellis that he wants to come back on the show. So, let’s celebrate by winding the clock back to June of 2010. Mayhem stopped in for every Monday that month (I think that’s the only month he ever accomplished that). It was, in my opinion, the peak of “Mayhem Mondays”.

Mayhem’s long awaited return after trashing the Ellis’ Beverly Hills home, they prank a phone solicitor, a buzzed Oxy John calls in, and Gay Ray & Mayhem have gay phone sex – 6/7/2010
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Bonus: Want the background to the Mayhem sex party? – Mayhem Sex Party In The Ellis’ House – The Complete Story (History)


Mayhem arrives unannounced after J.Ellis “tongue fucks” Rawdog for losing a UFC bet, more Oxy John, and the history of Mayhem vs. GSP – 6/14/2010
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J.Ellis is late and Mayhem starts the show, Steven Seagal & Anderson Silva training video, religion, jobs, and go kart racing – 6/21/2010
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The beehive holocaust, Mayhem lost his brand new iPhone 4, Chris Brown, Ashley Fiolek, Fedor, the 1st MMA death – 6/28/2010
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Mark de Mori interview – 11/3/10

Today Mark returned to the ring after a 2 year hiatus and scored an impressive 4th round TKO over American Dominique Alexander in Perth Australia. To celebrate here is Mark’s appearance on The J.Ellis Show just days before Ellismania 6: “November Pain!”.

Note: About 1hr in keep an ear out for an interesting and timely comment by Mr. “Six Pounds Soft”…. ;-)

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