Show Re-Cap for Friday 11/22/2013

Welcome to the end of the week where nobody is supposed to give a fuck or you’re out of the club. In case you didn’t notice right off the bat, Christian James Hand in the Tully chair, where is Tully, well he does’t give a fuck, and he’s sick. Jason posted an Instagram of Katie and her awesome back piece and Jeff Beacher, of Beachers Madhouse, commented asking if that was a dude. This threw off Jason because  he thought they were cool but with more investigating apparently Beacher thinks of himself as a comedian also, so even though he is a shitty comedian everybody figured he was just fucking around and didn’t mean anything serious by it. “Nothing is as bad as it seems in the moment” 3479-100-000-killer-bees-attack according to Rawdog, but he has never been attacked by a swarm of mother fucking bees! If you are in LA and and are wondering where you can workout to get your flabby turkey arms in shape you can work out with Katie and Ellis at the Legends Gym. Also some exciting news, Ellis has been sober nine days! Woohoo, time for a good ol fashioned hookers and blow sobriety party. Then they talked about Jason’s Porsche, Christian’s Mini, Cumtard’s Audi, and Josh’s inability to avoid concrete dividers in the parking garage. Someone brought up the news that Kim Kardashian sold some shit and only gave ten percent of the money to the Philippines instead of all of it. I think that’s bullshit, she shoulda flown there and given all the people shelter inside her gigantic ass. This is most likely an attempt to get a tax break on the profits. Plus according to Everlast the Kardashian’s are just the devil reincarnate. After arguing about this, a few callers, and failed attempts to get Everlast on the phone, we all went down, down to butt Town.

In today’s Shark News, two Newfies saved a green shark from choking on a piece of moose hide. If these two men were also playing hockey with a frozen puck of maple syrup in beaver hats, this would have been the most Canadian news ever. Lance Bass has a new single out and has a show on Out Q called Put It In My Bass and apparently he does

Thank you for calling the Frank show Mom

Thank you for calling the Frosty show Mom

his show from space. What is also apparent is my ability to remember even the smallest details of the Jason Ellis Show. Ellis is also going to appear on the Heidi and Frank Show and then after that he’s gonna be on the Holly Frosty and Hank podcast in Frosty’s mom’s basement. Some kid called in and someday hopes to be a trucker just like his daddy and his sister someday hopes to have a professional basketball player as her baby daddy. And today in Flaming Hot Cheetos news, who the fuck cares, Cheetos are fucking awesome. Speaking of food and shit they then started talking about working out, testosterone and boxing but I didn’t hear everything over the sweet crunch of my Cheetos. I did however hear the story of Ellis getting his eyebrows shaved off and it was hilarious, you should have been there! I just laughed and laughed and laughed!

Cheetos, Fuck Yeah!

Cheetos, Fuck Yeah!

You can live like a king in Panama, not because everybody there thinks every white guy is David Lee Roth, or becuase we are rich compared to everybody, but because everybody there is completely fucked. Then Christian started asking Ellis about his vacation almost as if Christian never listens to the show. I’m sure he is a faithful and daily listener and just

Tully can't drive, Fifty Fiiiiiiiiiiiive!!!!!!!!!!

Tully can’t drive, Fifty Fiiiiiiiiiiiive!!!!!!!!!!

making good conversation. Also some island that Josh probably pronounced wrong is going to disappear due to global warming. I suggest they buy a boat. Tully drives like a Lego man and Ellis is the most Competitive guy around and why are we talking about this? Because the go cart race is happening, ummm, soon! Tuesday I think, it would be a good idea to keep an eye on Ellis’s twitter for more details. Cock News from a Canookian, a man removed his genitals, got into a car, wrecked it, caught it on fire, then tried to put it out with his missing dick blood. Reddragons eh!

Shanning Crowder, a dolphin linebacker, that’s the guy that runs down the field with the ball, pissed himself every game. Just because. Wonder what you will see if you google

All of that skill and only one eyebrow!

All of that skill and only one eyebrow!

Jason Ellis skateboarding? Here’s a hint, it’s gonna be Jason Ellis skateboarding. There’s also a youtube video somewhere but I can’t find it so fuck it. What should you do when you forget your girlfriends birthday? Tongue the Bung, is that better than a boom box after forgetting you’re girlfriends birthday right? Linette says that a late birthday party is lame but a night where you sexually treat her and her desires is cool. So tongue the bung it is! After this intriguing and informative conversation it was time for final calls. And then the callers started. John In Houston called to inform everybody that he will be setting up an XGames EllisFam party in Austin June 5th to 8th. He has friends that own bars there and can hook us up with a meeting place for the three days. He is also a local there and can direct people to the best places to stay, eat and drink. Just hit him up on Twitter or Instagram for more details. And then they continued. It was a never ending flood of idiocy that cannot be rivaled and brings Darwin himself to tears. Retarded construction workers, retarded drivers, retarded callers. So many retards that yer mum isn’t sure if she should blow them or eat the crayons, OH!tongue the bung