Attempt 1
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Attempt 2 – “Jack Da Cunt”
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And of course the song that inspired the Aussie country music bit.
Ellis Covers Keith Urban – 6/10/11
Aussie Country Music – 2/3/12 (Song)
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Monthly Archives: February 2012
Show Re-cap For Thursday 2/2/2012
Today’s show was brought to you by the letter “G”, now on to more interesting things. There was talk about what would be the best thing/s to be made out of. The Michelin Man seemed to bring all this discussion on. There were so many conglomerations I couldn’t possibly list them all, but I think (not real sure) the end result was:
- Owl for a head
- Pythons for arms
- Bird for torso
- Kangaroos for legs
Alison Eastwood stopped by the show today. Yes that’s Clint Eastwood’s daughter so there’s a good chance that when she’s old, she’ll look like an old leather shoe. She’s got kind of a deep voice for a female (I hope Clint is not reading this), just imagine Clint with his balls in his throat and that’s what she sounds like. She talked about giving Rawdog a colonic, which is pretty hardcore and disturbing since I completely believe she would. Apparently she doesn’t like hair in guys’ butt cracks, so… there’s that.
She sounds pretty smart about quite a few things, nutrition in general. She also says she listens to the show and has even tried to call in. I’m assuming Cumtard hung up on her because he’s cumtarded. She carries a motherfucking switchblade and drinks a lot, there’s proof positive that Clint is her father and she must be a kick ass person. She also seemed very open and honest, she also had a great sense of humor and didn’t hold back on anything that I could tell. So overall she was a pretty awesome guest. Oh, yeah, and Donald Schultz (@donaldschultz) was also there.
Fred Durst also stopped by the show, which I can’t say I care about really. I was waiting to hate him from the get go and oddly, I didn’t. He didn’t act like a dickhole, asshole, or any other kind of hole. I know, surprising right? I seriously thought for sure this guy was gonna come off like a prick, instead, he Anderson Silva’d me. I still don’t like his music, and I could still care less about him, but his interview was alright I suppose. I found it a little boring, so I don’t have much to say on his interview.
That’s about it for the show. The majority of the show (about 3 hours) was spent interviewing Alison Eastwood and Fred Durst, no shit. Kind of like how the majority of gang bangs your mom is in are about 3 hours long.
Franklin, a gay listener, requests sex scenarios. Allison Eastwood calls in with a suggestion – 7/15/10 (History)
Show Re-cap For Wednesday 2/1/2012
Another new intern for Sirius XM came on the show today, says her nickname is Ozzy. Once again, this intern has never heard of the show, and sounds like maybe never heard of Jason Ellis. It amazes me the number of interns who want to get in to the business, and have no clue about anyone in the business, except for maybe knowing who Howard Stern is.
The impression I got in the first 5 seconds? She sounds annoying. Sounds like she thinks she knows it all, did I mention she’s 20? She mentions “experience” a lot. I remember when I was 20 and thought I knew it all. I think her age really showed she’s not ready to be making any kind of important (or even approaching important) decisions. But hey, she’s 20 and I’m a dirty old man so that may be why I found her a bit annoying. I will say this though, she got grilled pretty good – she stayed (fake) confident and her voice didn’t start cracking (though that might have helped.)
Rawdog seemed to be partially defending her, she must be good looking. I have no idea if she is or not, but it doesn’t matter. She said she wanted to be “in the business” since she was 7. I’m sure that happens to some people, but how shitty is your childhood if your dream at 7 is be a producer, editor, or whatever else she rattled off? At 7 years old, why don’t you want to be a princess, or a queen, or a unicorn, etc? Anyway, let’s move on.
Get this shit! Danny (@DanOD5), the other new intern? Yea, he used his position on the show to get with a chick in a motherfucking hot tub! Danny’s stock just went way up in my book! This chick offered to cook him dinner, she’s smoking hot, gave him her number, got connected on Facebook, this bitch has a fan page because she’s an aspiring actor. I mean, what in the blue fuck? Dude is in town for like a day and lands some hot ass actress type? It’s also speculated that Danny just may walk on water, although that hasn’t been confirmed yet – however I expect it to be, shortly.
Today was World’s Greatest Wednesday, so we’re determining the world’s greatest pterodactyl (the sexual maneuver). Nominees and overall winners, from 1st to last, were:
Stephen Hawking, Larry Flynt, and Christopher Reeve- Chevy Chase, Steve Martin, and Martin Short
- Bert, Ernie, and the Cookie Monster
- Danny and two clones of Danny
- Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, and Sammy Davis Jr.
- Dracula, Frankenstein, and the Wolfman
- Ronald McDonald, the Burger King, and Jack In The Box
- Sean Connery, Roger Moore, and Daniel Craig
- Bruce Lee, Chuck Norris, and Jackie Chan
- The Undertaker, Patrick Ewing, and Snuffaluffagus
And there you have it, that’s all the excitement that happened today. The only other exciting thing I didn’t tell you about was your mom did her first gaping scene today and handled it like a champ. You should’ve seen how wide her asshole was stretched, she said you would’ve been proud.
Dubstep Show Intro (Intro)
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