Daily Archives: March 7, 2012

How To Be a DJ On Shade 45

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There’s a simple formula on how to be a DJ on Sirius / XM’s Shade 45 channel and I’m going to reveal that secret formula to you! Get this down and you’ll be just as good as most all of the DJ’s on that channel with the only exception being Jude (@rude_jude) Here are the “secret” steps:

  1. Play the same “popular” songs that have been played 3 to 4 times within a 12 hour period.
  2. Make sure you interrupt the song multiple times by pushing a button that says: “Warning. The drama king is in the building.”
  3. Push that same button at least 5 times in a row.
  4. Push that same button again after 10 seconds.
  5. Now push a button that sounds like an air horn.
  6. Push that same button 3 to 4 times in a row.
  7. Repeat steps 2 through 6 until the song is over, making sure the audience has only heard a maximum of 10 words. The rest should be button sounds.
  8. Repeat steps 1 through 7 for the remainder of your shift.

Congratulations! You are now a “professional” DJ on Sirius / XM’s Shade 45 channel.

Show Re-cap For Wednesday 3/7/2012

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Chelsea Handler staying frostyYou know the start of the show, multiple topics. But the first big one was about the show’s fame and followers versus Chealsea Handler, which I think is kind of a silly comparison. For one, she’s on TV – how do you compare that to radio? Another thing is the fact that she’s female and not bad looking (not including the very not flattering picture I posted to the right), sex sells and it’s typically a woman that reaches the broadest audiences, rather than a male sex figure. Of course there’s also that whole speculation that she’s fucked her way to the top. I don’t think radio hosts will ever be as “known” or popular as people on TV or in movies. Howard Stern is well known, sure, but I think even his fame has declined a bit, especially when you think of someone like Johnny Depp. Depp has to make more money and is more relevant than Stern, especially when you start factoring in endorsements, commercials, etc. Anyway, this is kind of dumb as there is no comparison to be had here, so let’s keep this train a rollin’.

Uriah HeepUrijah Faber, I couldn’t give two shits about what he said on TUF, so instead I’ll talk about Uriah Heep for a second. When’s the last time you heard that song “Easy Living”? That’s gotta be their biggest hit, right? You know those fuckers are still making music? Me neither. Also, it has been confirmed that this Friday will be the last morning show as they will be moving to their normal afternoon time on Fridays.

As almost always on Wednesday’s, we play #WGW and today’s topic was World’s Greatest Thing You Can Do With $2000. And as usual, here’s the top 10 in order of their placing:

  1. Moose with a Top HatBuy a top hat, a shitload of Jack Daniels, and shoot a moose
  2. Demolition derby with four $500 cars
  3. Getting wasted, getting a hooker, rocking out to Limp Bizkit, and have the hooker “shave all my friends tonight”
  4. Stay frosty for 36 hours
  5. Hire an army of homeless people (or trannies) and have them reenact Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” in Beverly Hills
  6. Shitting on a Chik-Fil-A out of a helicopter
  7. Get Cumtard drunk and pay a tranny rape him (but won’t be rape because he’ll be drunk and willing)
  8. Buy a Pontiac Fiero
  9. Record a track with somebody from The Flipmode Squad
  10. Super 8 motel, tacos, beer, and hookers

And with that, I bid you adieu my frosty friends. There’s not much more for me to talk about, well, besides the fact that your mother loves to go ass to mouth. OH!