Hulk banging a cement truck

Yeaaaaaa motherfuckers. Tuesday, what can we say about Tuesday? Not a lot I suppose. I prefer not to talk about it. Dingo and Jude were on the show, and a dingo did in fact steal that one bitches baby, I think. It doesn’t matter if you blow Hulk or get fucked by Hulk, you’re gonna die because he’s going to get all up in (and completely go through) dem guts, aight. Rawdog may be forced to wear a bikini in his fight at Ellismania. That Sam Ruben dude from KTLA called in to the show and he still wants to send Ellis on press junkets to interview movie stars and shit. He had a bunch of helpful tips for interviewing these stars and such. The dopest part of all that talk? Ellis may get to interview Salma Hayek, she’s hot as hell, and I’d straight up ruin my life just to get all up on Salma.

Or maybe not so much

Surprise, surprise, CougarLife is a scam, because you have to keep buying credits to talk to fake cougar bitches. Who’da thunk it? Age 14 Tully, being the stud he is, broke up with his girlfriend and recorded it so he and his friend could listen and laugh about it. OH BURN, BITCH! Ellis went to the spa, some chick in the street asked him if that was parking for the spa. He goes into the spa, nobody is there and then suddenly a worker was giving a tour to this chick he saw in the parking lot. She comes into the room he’s in, sits down and starts talking to him, saying that Ellis reminds her of her brother. He was trying to teach her how to swim and shit, she left to go get a facial and said she’s going to start coming there at the same time he does. Sounds like she’s trying get with Ellis, but she probably could have skipped the whole “you remind me of my brother” line. Cool story bro.

Everything is going to be fine.

I had to pick my kid up after work because my wife got to go to the fucking horse track with her work like some kind of old ass, degenerate, gambling addict. That shit ain’t fair, I wanna go too! Anyway, so the last thing I heard was about a Mormon, who was married to a woman, but was gay and sexually attracted to men, but thought it would be a sin if he actually had sex with a man. What a conundrum that guys life must be. Next thing I knew, Tully was describing (rather sensually) an imaginary omelet he was cooking, to a caller. Doesn’t sound like I missed much, because I did hear another caller say he was impressed with Rawdog for kissing chicks and impressed with Ellis for not ending the show early today because of all the shitty callers. Speaking of shitty, I’ve got a craptastic joke about your Asian mother. Do you know why she has such squinty eyes? Because atomic bombs are pretty bright. OH!