Hello and welcome my friends to another wonderfully insightful edition of The Jason Ellis Show Re-Cap. Today started out with the boys going a bit Eco friendly. Grass topped bars, grass carpets, and log cars. These seem like interesting ideas until you start thinking, who’s gonna mow the bar? And if you throw up will there be a dead spot. Would dogs be allowed in, and who’s cleaning up that mess? Probably best to just leave things the way they are. Well punch me in the cock, Rawdog had a rather successful date. At least as successful as one would expect from Rumble McTumble Bum. This mystery internet woman seems very impressed with Josh and even said he looks better in person than on his profile pic. Fist Bump. I believe it is safe to say this girl will be swallowing some Tussin in the near future if you know what I’m saying. Yeah, you know what I’m saying. Today is also Rude Juduesday and Jude ruffled some feathers when he came in wearing a Vick jersey and totally defended dog fighting. Said dogs aren’t humans & he don’t give a fuck about a dog. This struck a nerve with many as expected but a mans opinion is his own.
Teens are fucktarded, as we all know. But they have brought it to a whole new level, they are drinking hand sanitizer to get drunk. What ever happened to the good ol grab and dash? That was a highly effective way of getting booze. Kids these days. We also heard some fucking awesome mash ups and parody songs, so shout out to Cruiser Boy and Mike Higgins, great job dudes. Jason’s book is now on the New York Times Best Seller list at number 23. That’s a huge fucking accomplishment from a dude who “can’t read or write.”
A guy named Gordy called the VIP line. This lucky 19 year old bastard got the number from his copy of I’m Awesome but not the circle jerk names. Hope is still out there, don’t give up. Other news, Octomom is a hoe bag and Chis Angel is a douche, as if we didn’t already know.
A bit of serious information, between May 8th and May 22nd download the song “Long Time” by Everlast. Precedes will help to find a better treatment for Cystic Fibrosis.
And I know that you are reading this Mr. McConaughey so will you please get your shirtless ass into the show, and Matthew, we can do this the easy way or the, aww fuck it, I can’t remember the quote. Much like I can’t ever remember what your mum says because it just sounds like shes gargling cum. And she is, OH!