Whaaaaat’s uuuuuup maaaan! It’s 4/20 duuuuuuude! You baked? You stoned to the bone? You higher than bird pussy? Duuuuude! First live show since like, forever, bro! Some chick Ellis was with during his vacation didn’t know what 420 meant, but she kept dropping the whole “turnt up” thing. He’s also very impressed with BET and loves their new show, Nellyville. He says it’s the black version of Curb Your Enthusiasm, and hey, it stars Nelly. Yes, that same one. Apparently Chris Rock is in it too and it’s a funny show, Ellis wants you to watch it. The fun didn’t stop there though, oh no, the BET Awards were on next. And yup, he watched it and yup, he said it was awesome and it left him inspired. How come famous black people only endorse shitty food that’s bad for you? From cheese and bacon stuffed pizza crust shit to McDonald’s chicken goo, they’re ready to plug that shit for some extra skrilla. By the way, seems it wasn’t Nellyville that Ellis was watching, it was Real Husbands of Hollywood, but that’s neither here nor there. Vikings, Ellis loves that show too. Ellis watched a bunch of shows about drugs too. He learned cocaine is bad for you, heroin is bad for you too but you just gotta worry about addiction and overdosing. He also learned alcohol is really bad for you, marijuana is sweet for you but it’s harsh on your lungs. Dingo is upset at the origin of 420, he liked it better when he thought it was a police code for getting arrested for pot marijuana. Ellis’ Porsche is broken. His truck is broken. Katie’s car is probably a write off. All in 7 days, that’s gotta be a record of some sort.
It’s Pot News time, bros. The cannabis industry is burgeoning in America, man. Hell yeah! You got some pain, man? Weed is your savior. You got some nausea, man? Weed will help you, dude. You got some stress, dudeman? Weed it up. Wicked stoner music legend Willie Nelson wants you to buy his weed, dude. You gonna do that shit, bro? How about buying some Bob Marley weed, irie man? Joanna Angel and her boyfriend are in the studio to talk about her boyfriend’s dick. Ellis’ Australian friends all agreed that he has a nice dick. But enough about cock, they’re here to talk about “Dude, Am I A Slut?” the porno. They basically watched a clip of it and talked about it and the creepy Russian guy in it. Hey man, McDonald’s, man, they’re trying out serving breakfast all day long, man, and it’s on 420, man! For real! Get turnt up! Time for a game, callers are pretending to be phone sex operators who need to try and satisfy their customer, Joanna – she really needs to get off. Several callers were actually pretty good, and of course several callers were creepy, and the rest were cringe inducing – but I think Joanna got off. Some Will dude (not Pendarvis) won the game and got a free membership to Burning Angel and Official Jason Ellis.
MMA News time, dude! People fought each other, guys and girls, dude! This one dude beat the shit out of this other dude, and this one chick beat the shit out of this other chick, dude, it was crazy turnt up! Lord Pendarvis came in to read some World News, dude. It was out of this world, man! Some people did some stuff and things happened and shit, man! Moto News, dude! It happened, people were all like “braaaaap” and shit, man! Woo! Corn liquor Chris called in to give us an update on himself, he had to do a stint in rehab, dude. Bummer deal, right bros? But hey man, let the weed show you the way, maybe become Weed Cracker Chris, dude. That was just a joke, man. Like a Christian, a Jew, and a paraplegic walk into a bar… you know what I mean, man? Apparently, dude, dude, get this, dude, a lot of listeners are sleep fuckers, man. Just going around fucking in their sleep, dude! HAHAHAA Wait, man, what we were talking about, dude? Oh yeah, sleep fuckers, dude! HAHHAAHAA Oh, yeah, bro, dude, Ellis wants to fight that CM Punk punk, man! Ellis was on some MMA Roasted thing, dude, talking about it and stuff, man. Oh, bro, man, dude! That’s pretty much all there is. Time to go get bake like a potato and order some pizza, right, man? HAHAHAA Wait. What?