Welcome back all you wonderful people who were prolly partying it up at Ellismania without me. Schwatevs..not like I didn’t have an absolutely amazing weekend working and being a mom. Sigh..I’ll get there one day guys, one day. I’m gonna do my best to give a good recap of today’s show, but baby mama was suuuuuuuper late picking up the Con-man today and it can be really tough listening to this show with a five year old running around.

First things first!! They are back and feeling goo— no, not feeling all that good…both Ellis and Tully seem to be feeling like all those times they took the week off following Ellismania was a really good idea cause they are kinda tired! Who can blame them, though, i was getting tired looking at all the wonderful pics that got posted by every single person i know on Instagram. Nope, not bummed at all. But anyway..Ellis is happy that he survived and that he got to eat ice cream and at least they had yesterday off. Ellismania seems to have gone off without a hitch and he is pretty pumped on that. He’s even sort of pseudo-pumped that Dan Blizarian was there for the event because the Ellismania pics he posted got hundreds of thousands of likes and that’s kiund of a big deal. Jude came by the studio and Ellis made sure to tell him not to wait to come in because he’s tired and radio is hard. Jude had a great time in Vegas with Ellisfam, GHB and Viagra. And then my Sirius cut out and I yelled at my app because i fucking love when Jude is on the show and it made me super sad.

When I was able to get back Tully announced ‘Get the Cock off your Chest’ Ellismania edition..and Ellis got the cock off his chest that there was some blitzed out on coke girl who showed up to his room in Vegas asking where the party favors were and Ellis kind of felt sketched out and didn’t want her in his room cause he didn’t want his room to be the drug room- especially since he didn’t have coke in there. They talked about coke for a while and Tully does not understand why people who are doing bumps can never just call cocaine by its name, they’re always calling it by some nickname and it would be way less creepy if they just came out and asked for cocaine just like people ask for weed or beer. And then Cullen called in and the cock he needed to get off his chest was “holy shit Ellis fighting ten men was insane” and they talked for a while about how it was, in fact, insane. Ellis is still just happy that he made it through to the end and thinks that it is the biggest compliment ever that Urijah pulled no punches and straight up beat the crap out of him and it was one of the best moments of his life.

Then getting on to the actual segment- no one called to get any Ellismania cocks off of their chest because what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas (duh) Tully and Ellis were really pulling for Andrew the Giant to get a cock off of his chest, but shucks, it seems that Andrew is just too nice of a guy to have ever done anything all that terrible other than arson, beating up people who pick on homeless people, and straight up rage. There were a bunch of callers who needed to get other things off of their chest, some of them were pretty terrible like the guy who drugged his drag-ass coworker with meth laced Mountain Dew and the girl who watched her teacher get drugged with a bit of acid and had to be escorted home. There were, as always, a bunch of people who called in to talk about how they fucked someone that was their friend or brother or other family member’s significant other. There was a guy who called in and begrudgingly admitted to banging his girlfriend’s sister and mother and still feels bad about it and advises any other guy in the same situation to get out because it’s just a bad road to go down. There was a female caller who broke it off with her fuck buddy right after she moved away, which she was only able to do because her fuck buddy lent her 500 dollars and she feels really bad about it…but not bad enough to pay back the 500 bucks she owes him apparently. Seriously lady, just pay back the money and get on with your life. Get the cock off your chest was a reallllllly long segment today, prolly cause Ellis and Tully are all sorts of tired, but I missed the ins and outs. there wasn’t anything that came across as completely shocking or hilarious.

Alaska has made weed legal and Will knocked out CumTard in the second round of his fight and he was really proud that he made him bleed. Andrew described him as positively giddy when that happened. After talking to both Will and CumTard the conclusion was reached that they were both supremely happy that they were able to stay on their feet for the first round. But, as no one was knocked out in the first round, neither guy had to undergo a torture. Kevin is free to not eat onion rings off of a dick and no one is allowed at Will’s house…ever. Will shared that news about Alaska legalizing weed, and also did an oscars recap.

Back from the last break Tully showed Ellis a video of a crab getting eaten by an Octopus and it seems like death by Octopus is a truly terrible way to go and thank god that’s not on the wheel of doom. Speaking of the wheel of doom, it’s time for HotDog to spin the newly updated wheel of doom because he won his fight to win a date with a working girl and he literally went on a date with a working girl. An allegedly terrible date since she talked about her ex boyfriend and the date did not end with sex. I still love HotDog. He is the best. Final calls were pretty up to their usual..or they are..as I’m listening to them right now. Big high five to TJ Lavin for calling in and giving Ellis a huge pat on the Ellismania back which also made Ellis put a restriction on cursing because TJ is picking up his daughter from school and he wants TJ to be able to listen to the last four minutes of the show.

In conclusion…big thanks to everyone who posted pics of Ellismania. Seriously. I love that there is this big event where everyone gets together and has fun and love and hugs and i can’t wait until I am able to get to one with the Hubbs and we can tear it up as well.