Its the Birthday re-cap. Not my birthday, it’s the other Jason’s birthday, the Australian Jason. Illness is still running rampant throughout the Swinghouse and it seems that the Tussin Baby has caught a bit of the sniffles, most likely from Tully. Speaking of Tully, he saw a black and a white gay buddy criminal team get arrested in the front of the studios on his way in. Like a modern day Billy & Clyde. Tasmanian Devils are rough lovers and they are extinct, except for the ones that are still alive, other wise they are all dead from disease. I blame the Herpes Badger, that motherfucker don’t give a shit, he gives Herpes. Ellis is going to be test driving some new dirt bikes while on vacation and says he needs a kidney belt so his 41 year old guts won’t get busted up so bad. Ellis watched a fairy mermaid barbie movie with Devin and was laughing at them tripping balls on some berries. I have seen this movie a number of times (I have 3 daughters, give me a fucking break) and also laugh at the “berries,” guess that was a little less obvious than shrooms. The guys talked a bit about the Hogan sex tape and the long of the short of it is whoever released that shit is fucked up. Nellie’s bus got busted in Sierra Blanca, Texas. You know the town that every tour bus has to go through even though they know they’re gonna get fuck with. Dumb asses.
There was a news story about an 1100lb woman. I’m not sure of the details because I can’t get past the fact that she weighs that much! How does she poop? Is it smelly? Does someone shave her cookie for her? Here’s the story if your more interested than me. Do you like noodles? I fucking love noodles, but not as much as this kid. Here’s the “I want my noodles”video sent in by bitPimps. An Australian man got kicked out of bar for having the worst mullet ever. I don’t think it’s the worst I’ve ever seen, but he ain’t no Billy Ray either. Zack Efron gets pissed on by Nicole Kidman in new movie, not sure what else to say about this, better than a story about a dudes mullet that’s fo sho! A guy called in to talk about his double baloney amputee girlfriend and how she is awesome in skating and snowboarding and other awesome shit. Ellis might have her on the show, hopefully that will be a cool interview to listen to. The guys then turned their attention tho politics and government, then the Libertarian party and their no taxes idea, and with no taxes there’s no laws so fuck it, let’s PARTAY! WWED? What would Ellis do; relationship advise. A dude is bored with his girlfriend, Jason says to dress as a dog and a nurse and fuck, Tully says to cheat, that shit works every time, what can go wrong.
Surprise, it’s Jagar Beard for a special appearance. I’m not going to spoil too much but this is defiantly worth listening to and I have one of those faces that people can trust. Ellis bought Thomas Hayden Church’s Porsche, good for him. Malice @Malice666Mcmunn (Katies friend) came into the studio today. She told us delightful stories about how she was abused, bounced from foster home to foster home, had an abusive mother, a drug habbit, and how she fisted her friend with rubber gloves on because her friend was a dirty whore. She’s also a self proclaimed cougar and if your a young dude on the streets she might just pull you inter her rape wagon and have her way with you and then you can write to Penthouse and tell them all about it. Malice is on Instagram at malicexxx and says she loves Instagram because its all asses and babies. It’s like, awwww, ooooh, awwwwww, ohhhhh. They played Jagar Beard’s survival quiz and all I really got from it is in any situation you need to zig zag while cooking grass hoppers with ants in your cookie while acting like Andy Dick. Do you know what you should do if yer mum starts to run at you suddenly? Nothing, she can’t run with all that dried up jizz making her thighs stick together, OH!