First and foremost, may I say Rest In Power to the legendary sir Christopher Lee. He starred in over 200 films, made symphonic metal albums in his 90’s, and was one of Winston Churchill’s most elite Nazi hunters. He was Dracula, the Man with the Golden Gun, Count Dooku, and the dark wizard Saruman. An absolute legend if there ever was one. Thank you, good sir, for all that you’ve done. They don’t make them like that anymore, and that’s exactly the point Ellis started today’s show off with. TRANSITION, BITCHES! Bet you thought I couldn’t pull that one off, eh? Tully and Ellis theorized on how certain people, who would best be described as “indoor people” (AKA Rawdog), came into existence. Tully thinks it’s in their DNA and only recently has society evolved to the point where they could survive and thrive. Thank you, Internet… Will came in for a discussion about being rebellious as kids and how they dealt with disappointing their parents. Tully, being the goody two shoes that he was as a kid, washed his own mouth out with soap one time. What a wuss. You know who else are wusses? Brendan Schaub and Bryan Callen. Apparently they’ve been ducking Ellis as it pertains to fighting at EM11. in other EM11 news, the musical performance situation is in the air, Ellis thinks HoF fighters, like our boy Butterballs, should get paid if they fight, and Will wants to have special patches made for the event. Jesus, Will. You need help. You’ve gotta stop this patch addiction. Ellis wants to have something special to give to HoF fighters/VIPs at EM11, with ideas ranging from cheap champagne to backstage passes. Personally, I like the ideas the bossman himself, bitPimps, came up with:
We returned from break with a bit of Shark News: a truck transporting several sharks blew a tire on the highway and spilled the sharks onto the road, causing one to die. Not to be outdone, around 2000 or so pigs spilled out onto the road in Ohio. Either truck drivers have a vendetta against animals, or the animals themselves are causing these accidents so they can escape. VIVA REVOLUTION! Kevin came in to try out a phone app that allows you to record multiple voice tracks and layer them together to make a song. Someone call the Grammy’s because that was pure musical magic. It’s just so damn catchy and doesn’t make you want to drill your brains out with a cordless drill at all. What’s that? What do you mean, “Why are you picking up that drill”? I just have some….projects to work on…yeah that’s it. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a really big hole to drill.
Australia is a country. News happens there, or so I’m told. An Aussie couple has vowed that if same sex marriage is passed in Australia, they will get a divorce. Welp, that’s it. Pack it in, everyone. It was a valiant effort. A 23 year old Aussie lady put her cigarette out on the face of a female reporter after a long time in court. Sex with that chick must be *removes sunglasses* BURNING with intensity. YEEEAAAAAAHHHH!!! A new mammalian species in the Outback literally fucks itself to death. Fuck yeah. His holiness, Thomas Hayden Church, made his appearance on the show and decided to stay on for the rest of the show. Blessed be, THC. With Thomas in studio, it was the perfect time to bring up the STILL unsolved mystery that is Fartgate 2015. Surely, with THC gracing them with his presence, none of the suspects could lie. After watching the footage once again, Ellis was convinced that Andrew is the perpetrator. How dare you, Andrew. How DARE YOU lie to the glorious face of Thomas Hayden Church. The rest of the show was spent basically just shooting the shit with Thomas and listening to him talk about “Tombstone” and all of the other movies he’s been on. It was fucking awesome. I could listen to him talk all day. I want Thomas to adopt me so he can tell me stories and hang out with me all of the time. I love that guy.