I guess today is the second best thing to Friday, but it sure beats the hell out of Monday. Do you know who the coolest successful Asian dude is? I can’t really think of one, there

Coolest dude ever!

are successful Asians, and there are, well, there are successful Asians. Off the top of my head I cannot think of any that are really that cool, someone that I would be stoked to hang with. Rawdog thinks the dude from the Hangover is cool but that’s because its Rawdog and his thinking is less than cool at times. This started todays show theme of coolness, whos cool, how to be cool, and whats cool. Heres a guide, it has pictures. And no I didn’t read it, I’m already the coolest mother fucker writing this re-cap right now! The coolest god would probably be Buddah, he probably smokes and knows where to get great food. The coolest dude is probably Johnny Depp because bitches want to get all up on his shit. And the coolest dudes on Twitter are probably @bitPimps and @Mike_in_Canada. BitMike2012!

Chris Humphries might have given his alleged big gay baby herpes to some alleged massive slut allegedly. He denies giving it to her which only means one thing, big gay baby has herpes allegedly. Some 100 year old dude backed through a bunch of people and kids and sparked the conversation of what we should do with our creepy smelly elders? Some of the ideas were to use them as a food source, use them for energy, put them into a demolition derby because they already fuck the shit out of their cars now, and get them all hopped up on some good shit and drop them into a war to “take one for the team.” But no matter what we should truly cherish our elders because with out them we wouldn’t know…..hmm, I got nothing. Carry on.

Aaliyah Love was in the studio today and she is a porn star who was apart of the 3000 frames per second shoot for Ellismania.com and so she gets to plug her shit and we all get to sit back and wait until she’s gone. But being a good sport here is what they talked about, porn, boobs, cam girl, shaving, boobs, putting things in, snowballing, squirting, masturbation, shit, shitting while masturbating, masturbating with shit, you know, the usual stuff.

There will be a Town Hall Question something something with Tony Hawk and SiriusXM sometime soon after the Ellis Show, you should check your local listings because I can’t find shit, and honestly I didn’t look very hard. But check it out! Will came in with his earth shattering observation that he believs that Sunday Morning Coming Down is one of the greatest songs ever. I listen to country and it’s a good song, but not one of the greatest, shame on you Will. Whats up with Pussy Riot? If you care click the link, fuck, I didn’t know who they were until now, and I still don’t give a shit but there you go, thats the kind of awesome dude I am. Vince Vaughn will bitch out if Jack Nicholson enters the room, Christopher Walken is probably a really awesome dude to chill with, and in case you didn’t know, Christopher Walken got his hair style from yer mum, after she dropped her pants, OH!