Guess What?

CHICKEN BUTT! Fried in grease, want a piece?!

HAHAHAHAAA OMG I’m soooooooo funny gurl! Shooooo weeeee! Okay, that was a total exaggeration. I’m not really that funny, I stole that whole “chicken butt” joke, I’m not sure who came up with that one, I think it might have been Jesus. I mean, how can someone live up to that? No matter how hard I try, I just can’t top it. Or can I? Anyway, that’s not really the point behind this post. So now you’re sitting there reading this and in your head I can hear, “So, WTF? What is this post about? Are you going to try and make me laugh or what?” Well, I’m going to try to do just that, and I’ll tell you why I try to do just that.

My sense of humor has been called pretty much everything. Dark, twisted, rude, crude, dry, insensitive, derogatory, sexist, racist, negative, awesome, etc. But why do I try to make you laugh? Because it makes you feel good. And by making you feel good, I feel good. See? Me making you laugh can be for my own selfish reasons. Good selfish reasons though, we both gain from it. And I like to make people laugh or at least smile, I also like blow jobs but that’s neither here nor there (unless you give free, no strings attached blow jobs.)

So there you have it. You and me have a relationship together. It’s a “give and take” relationship, it’s even, we both benefit from it. Matter of fact, I might benefit a little more than you. And that’s only because any money your mom makes hooking goes to me and I’ll give her what I think she deserves. Also, I am not your daddy. Sure I’ve slammed that ditch pig you call a mother, but I made sure I always pulled out. OH!

2 thoughts on “Guess What?

  1. Once again I laughed, I cried and then I Came. Exactly what I needed I’m to lazy to find the tv remote, could possibly be in my asscrack and 16 and pregnant is making me wana open an abortion clinic. Thank you for this kind sir

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