Show Re-cap For Tuesday 5/8/2012

Tuedee. That’s how I think @MumTard might say Tuesday. I don’t really know though because when she opens up her yapper, I just shove my dick in it. Ellis does not have breast cancer (or so he says) but does have hemorrhoids – really big ones according to Dr. AssGazer MD, PhD, NOHOMO. He also got to have his titties squeezed to shit in that mammogram machine thing that chicks love so much. Tully told a story of getting mugged – more than once actually, and at some point, Jude got robbed by a twelve year-old with a rifle. Shits rough out in dem skreets, yo. Ellis got a new phone with Siri on it, it took a good 45 minutes and some fake American accents to get Siri to even acknowledge his existence. Siri sounds like a stuck up bitch.

There was some talk about Dannii Minogue, apparently she’s related to Kylie Minogue, and that’s pretty much all I think anyone knows about her except that her vagina is probably nasty as fuck, but I digress, who gives a shit. So could Ellis beat up anyone from The Avengers? Mary Poppins? Batman? He says yes, and I say no, and since he doesn’t read this – that means I am right! MUHAHAHAHAA! North Carolina is in the fucking bible belt and seeming still inbred. They are voting on Amendment One today, banning gay marriage. Supposedly some gay guy has already been beaten up for talking to voters there, stay classy North Carolina.

Today was New Old Music Tuesday from 1982, and as someone born in 1974, I think it was harder to stomach than what we’re used to hearing on Tuesday’s. The 80’s were just god awful for just about everything. Ellis can pull an RV and lift a keg with his nuts, at first that sounds pretty hardcore, and then an instant later, it sounds insane and dangerous. I suggest not doing that for the very real possibility of ripping a ball out of your scrotum. One thing I would suggest doing though, is to drive home as soon as possible and fuck your mother. OH!

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