Easter is over and so is your fucking life if you don’t read this post in it’s entirety, because I have some potentially life saving information for you later on, but first, this: EllisMania 8 dates have been changed, again, no I’m completely serious, and these are solid dates. *wink*wink*nudge*nudge* In all complete seriousness, it is July 14th, so there ya go – or not – whichever. Ellis went riding crotch rockets with Donald Schwartz, Grant Cobb, & some other dude this weekend, and if you didn’t already know – Donald is apparently not afraid to die. Aside from fucking with dangerous animals, and skydiving, he pops wheelies! As fun as sport bikes are, it’s usually only a matter of time before something not good happens – so let’s hope Ellis doesn’t get to keep the bike for long.

In business news, Microsoft paid over $1 billion to acquire 800 patents owned by AOL, and Instagram was purchased by Facebook for $1 billion. Also, we are all fucking poor when compared to the aforementioned technology companies, so who gives a shit? Ellis and Rawdog might get married, for gay rights of course, and I for one would support their union. In sporting news, tonight is the big go-kart race with a ton of people for the Big Fucking Mega-Boat movie. Rawdog got stuck in a corner while riding go-karts previously, and it was also revealed that he has bumped the shit out of his sister while driving bumper cars. And in weather, titty sprinkles.

Now with the ever so important, potentially life saving news that was promised earlier. The CDO and other International agencies are warning people of the potential for acquiring the deadly AIDs virus. How do you make sure you don’t contract this deadly virus? Scientists say it’s simple, first is to identify the carrier (see image below), and the next step is to stay away from the carrier, which goes by the name of: mom. OH!