Welcome back to the Friday-ish recap. I’ve been struggling to stay alive for the last three weeks choking on dust and driving a truck that doesn’t have any AC in Phoenix. I’m lucky I haven’t spontaneously combusted. I was unable to listen to the first half of the show but this is how my heat stroked brain thinks it went. Continue reading
Happy #ThrowBackThursday! Today I’m throwin it way back to a few hours ago when Ellis opened the show by looking into the hole after a strenuous tit workout that left his man boobs sore and hard as steel. But that;a what men do, workout their tits! The discussion somehow turned to Rocky and actors playing boxers playing athletes and not really being anything of the sort. Pretty much just a bunch of pussies with boxing gloves on. Tully’s bitch ass neighbor has a bunch of rocks in her yard and gets her panties in a twist every time a single piece gets moved out of place, mainly because shes a mean old witch and Tully is trying to reinforce this with his own loin seed. someday this child will know that retaliation is a lot of work but in the end it is always worth it. If this is the only thing that Tully teaches his kid this will be it as he tramples through the mediocrity on his way to success. Or getting his ass kicked, whichever comes first. Continue reading
What a mother fuckin ball busting week! This is the first show I’ve been able to listen to in its entirety. Good thing too otherwise this recap would be even shittier. Ellis began his monologue saying that he remembered that he thought he couldn’t do a trick but he tried and then he did plus many more he didn’t think he could do then he was number one. That my friends is called inspiration, so grab a skateboard and be inspired. Just try not to break your dome in the process. Tully said his job isn’t to inspire but to crack jokes and read the New Yorker so we don’t have to. He’s doing a great job at it also. My job is to break shit and tell jokes about yer mum, and so far so good. Remember the Ellis hotel lesbian Wolfknife workout party? Well now it’s going to probably be moved to a gym so it will be the Ellis Gym Lesbian Wolfknife Workout Party. There’s some UFC fights this weekend, seems like I said this last Friday, just to be preemptive for next Friday, there will be some UFC fights that weekend too. Tully is going to spend part of his weekend watching shitty movies and loving them.
Coywolf don’t give a shit. Coywolf will fuck you up. Coywolf will fuck your bitch and not call her again. Why? Because it’s a mother fuckin coyote wolf and is now taking over the north east, that’s fucking why! Ellis and Tully did a bit of Faction music cleansing by deciding what songs shouldn’t be played in the four hours Ellis has control and what songs shouldn’t be on Faction all together. Unfortunately they took calls on some of the music and this again proved that the callers are idiots. Faction is a menagerie of music from rock to punk to hip-hop and most everything in between. If all they want is rock then listen to Liquid Metal, Octane, Lithium, Classic Rewind, or Classic Vinyl you fucking tool bags. I love listening to Faction because of the variety and not all the songs I like, but that doesn’t mean someone else doesn’t like it. Except that one song, that song is a pile of flaming shit.
In Breaking UFC News the UFC is going to start their own year round random drug testing. This will make a more level field for all competitors. Then they played Ellis jeopardy, hotdog won. I’m not going to elaborate on the game because we’ve all heard it before and if you haven’t then you suck. After the game they assigned more Wolfkinfe names. Again, if you haven’t heard this either then you double suck. But if you have then we salute you.
In yet another Breaking MMA News, Joe Soto will fight Dillinshaw tomorrow. The other dude pulled out due to health concerns. Mainly his pussy hurt too much and he was bloated from retaining water. Have you ever met a celebrity? Was it weird? Well if so then you’re not alone because today’s new bit was Weird Celebrity Encounters. Starting us off was Will with a story about Andy Dick trying to get into his car while he had his kids with him. Weird. Here is a summary of most of the other stories. Sebastian Bach thinks dudes are better with tits, Bruce Willis is a dick, Andy dick loves the bible, Shawn white can’t play poker for shit, Andy Dick is indestructible, some dude fucked some lesbian Disney kid, Tiger Woods doesn’t want you touching his fucking clubs, Lou Ferrigno yells so he can hear himself, Tony Yayo is an angry mother fucker, and one dude turned down a threesome with Ron Jeremy and yer mum because she had more body hair than Ron, OH!