Show Recap for Friday 8/22/2014

Since you’ve been gone I can do whatever I want, I can see whomever I choose, I can eatimage (5) my dinner in a fancy restaurant, but nothing, I said nothing, can take away these blues. Cause nothing compares, nothing compares to you. But now that you’re here it’s all good in the hood yo. Oh and today’s recap is brought to you by the tastey, delicious, beautiful bacon and dick torturing bacon splatter. Somewhere in the conversation on bacon Jason and Tully started talking about Kurt Russell, then Goldie Hawn, Kate Hudson, The Hudson River, Superman, and finally Kevin Bacon. See! Everything in life leads back to bacon. Tully saw Mia at the car dealership. I don’t know who she is but I guess she got famous by singing a song with ODB then he fucked her and now she’s fucking creepy Audi salesman at the Mercedes lot. Because Michael saw this sorta famous chick they brought back everyone’s favorite bit, Hollywood News. Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon broke up. Who cares. Kim Kardashian’s shitty app got beat in jacksondownloads by Tom Hanks shitty app. Lindsay Lohan failed the ice bucket challenge because she got champagne dumped on her but nobody filmed. Michael Jackson threatened to throw shit snowballs at staff and leisurely pissed all around his house because he’s the mother fuckin king of pop and he’ll piss wherever the fuck he wants. Timberlake offended a bunch of bitch ass pussies on twitter. Rhianna is kicking ass and flickin the bean on Twitter, and Paul Walker is still dead. There’s moto this weekend so keep an eye out for that at a moto track near you. There’s also a UFC fight so keep an eye out for that at an, ummm a UFC track near you?

After the break Katie joined Ellis and Tully to talk about roller coasters and putting bacon in their mouths. But first, some news! A dude and his buddy kidnapped and robbed his fiancé but she used her engagement ring to escape, and after moving in with a long distance boyfriend in Texas some chick to killed him with

Bacon in your mouth!

Bacon in your mouth!

a romantic tub of flaming death. Tubs of flaming death are metal. Harley Morenstein of Epic Meal Time finally came in studio, and he did not come alone, he brought bacon. During the interview between mouthfuls of delicious crunchy bacon they talked about bacon, turkey bacon, Canadian bacon, bacon-kabobs, bacon creole, bacon gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried. There’s pineapple bacon, lemon bacon, coconut bacon, pepper bacon, bacon soup, bacon stew, bacon salad, bacon and potatoes, bacon burger, bacon sandwich. That- that’s about it. If you like bacon check out Epic Meal Time on YouTube.


Stripped Vocals, so hot!

Tully introduced a new segment called Super Creepy Real Life Stories. Today’s story is about a Russian guy with a collection of human sized dolls. The catch is that they were human sized because they were real humans. Almost. They were dead, fresh from the grave yard. Christian joined the party with his signature hit segment stripped vocals. Here are some of the highlights of the segment. Ronnie James Dio, Brad Delp of Boston, The Temptations, The Turtles, The Beatles, and midway through the segment Ellis invited Catherwood into the studio so he didn’t have to rock out alone in the hallway and coincidentally Christians CD started to malfunction. Coincidence or conspiracy?

After listening to Metallica’s worst song ever, the guys managed to get the CD fixed so we got to hear Lamb Of God, Morrisey, Layne Staley of Alice In Chains, and finally ending with Steve Perry singing Journey’s Don’t Stop Believing. Fucking beautiful. Wanna know what else is fucking beautiful? Fuck Line with Mike Catherwood. But that’s not what they did, 133009they played Who On The Show Is The Most Mexican. Some of the questions were, do you own any Raiders gear? Do you own any Dickies? Have you ever used avocados for anything but good? Have you ever used a check cashing service? Have you ever worn cutoff jeans for swim trunks? Do you like cilantro? Have you ever dated a chick with kid? Have you ever ate balonga in a tortilla? Do you pluralize words that shouldn’t be? If you answered yes to most of those questions then you might smell like tacos and tequila. Ellis and Katie are the most cholo with Jetta being the most obvious super white vanilla gringo on the show. After a barrage of mind numbing retardedry of phone calls Hotdogs ended the show with his weekend plans. He’s going to party, fix some shit, renew his medcard, and then he’s gonna fuck yer mum, LOVE IT!

Show Recap for Thursday 8/7/2014

Well…after all that went on, or rather didn’t go on in the last hour of the show yesterday (you know…the 40 minutes of show that didn’t happen because of all that contract gobbledegook) one of the big questions of the day was sort of…will there even BE a show today? Well…there was, which is why I am here, because I am going to recap that show that went on today as best as I can…which should be pretty okay considering I had no app issues, my laptop seems to be cooperating, I’m actually at home before 11:30, and my kid is tucked in bed (and looks like he’s about to pass out, so I’m pretty sure my bases are covered). So, getting right into it…Welcome to The Jason Ellis Show Thursday Recap, I’m your host, Jenny!!! Woo! Lots of applause and maybe some applesauce because I can’t think of one without the other when I’m typing it!!! Woo!!! Applesauce!! Except not..applesauce is gross. I mean, I’m sure it’s delicious…it’s a texture thing. I can’t get over it.

Anywhoo…..Ellis opens up the show and is all “Hey, I’m here” and there was a collective sigh of relief…probably. For anyone who missed the show intro, at least. He dove right into the whole ‘who knew whether or not we’d be here cause, man, contracts, am I right’ and informed all the listeners that he and Tully will at least be around on The Jason Ellis Show on SiriusXM for another 30 days because he’s signed another one of those contract extension dealies while (supposedly) the rest of the details of the contract get hammered out. He talks about how he’s sure that, in the end, it will all work out one way or another, although it seems like he may be having to make more concessions than originally planned. Overall, He and Tully agree that there are still some sleepless nights ahead of them both and man, can they not wait for all of this contract bullshit to be over with so they can go back to just doing a radio show. I bet the rest of us really can’t wait for this contract bullshit to be over with either, because I don’t know about the rest of you people out there in the US and Canada, but this shit has me way more on edge than I’d like. Probably because, for so many of us, The Jason Ellis Show is way more than just a show. Are you listening SiriusXM? Seriously…I have to question where I would be in life right now if it weren’t for this show…the support from Ellisfam, the kindness shown to me by all of you guys, the other guys on this TJES dedicated site, Jude, and the doors that all of this has opened for me…I don’t know where I’d be. Ellis is building his Empire and he welcomes the hard work, stress, and sleepless nights with open arms at this point, because it’s all going to be worth it in the end, and there is no blocking out the sun. Ellis is the sun, for those of you who work the night shift.

Ellis does share that he woke up this morning and was feeling a lot better physically…his stomach doesn’t hurt, he was able to eat breakfast, he shadow boxed a little bit while he was at the Spa, and thank freaking god for that, because he’s coming out to NYC sometime next week to talk contract shit and he didn’t think that he’d be able to get through the trip if he was feeling all shitty still. He also called up his money manager person last night and let her know that he was blowing off some steam with his credit card at the sex shop and it wasn’t a discussion, just a ‘heads up’ and the money manager person who tries to help Ellis from going broke all of the time knows about all the stress and didn’t try to enforce any limits on him, just went “lol heads up” and Ellis and Katie were off to the sex shop where among other things, he purchased a wolf mask for katie, some pants, and a sex swing that doesn’t have to be bolted in to the wall. Ellis has also been watching some dungeony torturey porns lately trying to pick up tips and he says that there are some of them that are really good, and some of the things that he sees goes on he’s really into and other things not so much, and if he could just pick and choose that seems way more up his alley. Tully jokes about how he’s pretty sure that there are dungeons he could go where he’s be able to kind of tell them what he was in to and they would listen to him, but then there may be other places where you straight up are made into some dungeon mistress’ bitch for an hour and then you thank her and are on your way, so it’s probably better to avoid any dungeons that happen to be on yachts and in international waters. The guys in the green room still haven’t been able to get their hands on a Fist of Adonis- like hammer fist dildo and Ellis chews out Kevin a bit for it, and informs him that there was one at the shop he was at last night and maybe he should hit google on his iphone a little harder since Katie found it in about 25 seconds.

A caller calls the show with a question about Ellismania happening this year and Ellis says it, once again, there is not going to be an Ellismania this year. He’s bummed that there won’t be one this year, but he says that it’s going to occur at the beginning of 2015 and it’s going to be great because there is a real production company involved because he really cares about it getting done right. Live Nation is the company who is getting behind it this time, and I’ve been to one of their events and they seem pretty legit, so let’s all keep our fingers crossed that they have enough people to make sure that there are chairs for a musical chair fight and a pinata for the pinata fight. Ellis goes on a bit of a reminisce about how Ellismania got started at the Hard Rock (EM3) and how it could not have happened if not for him squeezing every dime he could out of his sponsors, and especially had Chad Reed not contributed $5000 of his own dollars. Seriously…that’s a lot of money to put into something where there is no payoff and where no one is making any money. Thank you, Chad Reed. Ellis did say that before the end of the year there would be a HorseForce performance in NYC and a Wolfknives with Wolfknives Models shindig at The Roosevelt, and he really does want to plan some sort of little event like the Cricket Match so he can hang with the fans. So far as the cricket match goes, he puts it on us, so start a tweeting and instagramming where and when there should be an Ellisfam Cricket Match!!!

Back from the first break Tully brings us some MMA News, and thankfully since there were no fights I didn’t have to listen to Kenda giggle incessantly about nothing for the entire time and get angry on behalf of intelligent females everywhere. And yeah, that’s a dig, and no I’m not saying that I think she’s not an intelligent person as I do not know her, but she really sounds like a moron and it grates on me. If she could stop the whole ‘giggle to begin and end every sentence and in response to anything said to her’ thing I’d get back on board, because when she first started calling in it never bothered me. It took a few weeks for it to build up and make me frown at the radio, but now I find her completely insufferable. Anywayyyyy….Kyle Kingsbury, who has retired from the UFC after being thrashed by Patrick Cummins in UFC12 has come out of the ayahuasca closet basically blaming his loss in that fight to his use of the plant medicine that Aubrey Marcus has informed us all of, but that it’s okay because it made him a happier person. Interesting angle for sure. There was also a bit in there about how he had been told by the UFC to keep the inner peace talk to himself because it made him sound crazy, but he’s talking about it now since he’s retired, and that’s cool. It’s good to be cool. Speaking of retired UFC guys, Tully plays a clip of an up and coming SpikeTV show called Gym Rescue featuring Randy Couture and Frank Shamrock and it sounds like there is a lot of yelling involved, and Ellis and Tully both think that it’s a show that they would like to watch and maybe even follow for Show purposes. Tully makes a comment about getting the duo on the show to talk up Gym Rescue and there is silence from the Green Room, so Ellis starts talking about how they should just get the number and maybe call them on air, because Ellis is sometimes also the producer of his own show. Ellis brings up that there may be assault charges of some form being brought about because of the fistfight between Daniel Cormier and Crazy Bones Jones at a publicity stop in Vegas for their upcoming actual sanctioned fight, but Tully pulls an ‘I don’t know’ because Ellis is getting his info from the people over at TMZ and they can’t always be trusted to not sensationalize things. Ellis also brings up that Holly Holm has signed on with the UFC and people are already calling for her to fight Ronda Rousey, but that’s kind of bullshit because she hasn’t had one UFC fight yet and shouldn’t immediately get thrown in for a title fight. Holly Holm, however, does seem to be the new lady talk of the town because she is a great striker and Ellis is sure to mention that he saw a video of her kicking an opponent in the face and then punching her while she was still down because she is an animal. There is some talk back and forth between Tully and Ellis about who is next to fight Rousey, and whether the Cyborg fight is gonna happen, and why the hell is Cat Zingano not definitely the next person that Ronda is fighting?

Onto some Hollywood News, Tully informs us that Marianne Faithfull (who boned Rod Stewart and Mick Jagger when she was hot and didn’t look like a penguin) has come forward in an interview to say that her ex-boyfriend sold Jim Morrison the heroin that killed him back in the day and that it was an accident. This, of course, can’t be substantiated as Morrison’s body was never autopsied. There seems to be talk around town of a Mike Tyson Biopic which will be starring Jamie Foxx and Ellis, at first, doesn’t seem too fond of the idea, but comes around once he realizes…what other actor could really play Tyson other than Jamie Foxx? Tyler Perry really isn’t big enough, although Wendy Williams could throw her hat in the ring because she’s fabulous. Speaking of Hollywood and Movies, Tully is excited to announce that Filmmaker Neil Bomkamp and Ninja and Yo-Landi Vi$$er of Die Antwood have finished filming a new movie called Chappie, because he is slightly in love with Yo-landi and he is sure that it will be his favorite movie of all time. Neil Blomkamp, for those of you who don’t know, is the man behind District 9 and Elysium (both movies that Ellis loved) and he’s kind of helping to put South Africa on the map in a good way. In other big H news, Sly Stallone is talking about extending the Expendables franchise to some new movies called the Expendabelles featuring females who have been prominent in action roles over the past however long, and Ellis is not all that pumped on that idea because Old Lady faces only tell sad stories. I mean, really, the short list for that movie has to be the shortest short list of all times, unless they are really going to expand their definition of female action hero. All I’m coming up with is the Terminator Chick and Alien Chick. As Hollywood Movies are going down the toilet anywhere, there are rumors in Hollywood that there is to be a third Ghostbusters movie featuring All Female Ghostbusters comprised of Hollywood Funny Women and…I’m all for girl power…but what…did the guys sign the Ghostbusters over to one of their daughters or something? How is that gonna work? Rounding out Hollywood News there is some talk about Terminator 5: Genisys which is the title and spelling that is making everyone on Twitter go insane because twitter needs to lose its shit on something new every 5 seconds, and Kanye West giving a deposition about some paparazzi fight where he walked about downed paparazzi drones possibly electrocuting his 1 year old daughter and sky-rocketing himself to the top of the list of contenders for The Dumbest Rich Person in the World.

Back from the break there is a guest…well…a guest and soon to be a couple more guests in the studio! The main guest is Amy Purdy, a pro-snowboarder, Para Olympian, who is also a motivational speaker and was first runner up on Dancing With The Stars. Earlier in the show Ellis had mentioned that she was going to be on the show and he was pumped on it because Devin really liked her and was a fan of her on DWTS and he and Tully looked up her Instagram and talked about how beautiful she was and the possibility that Daddy could be cool in Daddy’s eyes for 3 seconds because she is in the midst of a serious ‘My dad is not cool’ phase. But anyway, Amy Purdy is on the show and she is a straight up delight. I really enjoyed her time on the show. She talked about how she lost her legs at 19 due to Bacterial Meningitis along with both of her kidneys and her spleen, but was able to overcome it and turned to Snowboarding as a profession (she previously had only done it as a hobby) because after she lost her legs, she wanted to find a way to use her legs. Damn. She talked about how it was being on DWTS and how it was more challenging than she had even imagined because it was an intense 3 months where she danced for six hours a day and not only had to learn a new dance every week like the rest of the contestants, but had to go through the process of how to figure out which prosthetic legs would work for each of the dances. It was interesting to hear about how she coordinated not only with her dance partner, but with the company who produces her prosthetic legs and the doctor who fit them to get a pair of legs that would enable her to perform every dance. At one point during the interview Devin and Tiger showed up at the studio so Devin could meet Amy and tell Ellis on air that she was not impressed by him and didn’t love him. And that part really broke my heart. I mean…I understand how kids are and how they can be, but I never personally went through the whole ‘My dad is lame’ phase and I was basically crying to Hubbs about that for a second. Ellis rolled with the punches though, as he does (and also because he’s her father and he knows that she loves him) and continued the interview with kid interruptions like a champ. Amy talked about her future plans, including publishing a book with Harper Collins (who published Ellis’ books) which is already finished and was written in 6 weeks, how she has a clothing line with Element, and how she is going on tour with Oprah. THE Oprah. Ellis asked Amy if she was single and she told him that she wasn’t, but that her boyfriend Daniel was a big fan of the show and listened every single day. Hi Daniel!!!! Lucky guy, I’d say, because she really seems like a cool lady with a good head on her shoulders. I was definitely feeling very inspired by the end of the interview and advise anyone who feels like they had a bad day to listen to it On Demand. I’ve been in a teensy slump and listening to her was a swift kick in the bum…I mean…she was living a happy, normal life, thought she had the flu, went to the hospital and went into a friggin coma for 3 weeks, woke up and heard she had to have her legs amputated and some organs taken out and that she may still die…and she just kept going. She just kept going. And she turned her life into something fucking amazing. Great guest!!! I hope she comes back to watch Sting Pong and promote her book!!!

Back from the break, Tully talks about how there is a serious deficit of things they can talk about with the kids around and brings up some science myths that everyone believes but are untrue like people only using 10 percent of their brains and there being a dark side of the moon. They then get talking about an article he found about poop and thongs and women wearing thongs and g-strings and how maybe women shouldn’t since apparently most women walk around with shit stained strings up their bum at all times and Ellis is so not into the article, but they talk about it for way longer than they should anyway. Ellis and Tully are both part of the camp that believes g-strings have a purpose and shouldn’t be worn absolutely all of the time and women should invest in some undies. Nascar Mike calls the show to talk about a patent pending invention he has that velcro’s to g-strings to keep them from getting stained by bum juice because his wife has that problem and he doesn’t like her in ‘grannie panties’…and I just want to say, sorry Nascar Mike the big companies all already make panty liners for thongs and g-strings and just because it’s not a string up your ass doesn’t mean it’s a grannie pantie. Seriously. That pisses me off. I enjoy thongs a lot…Hubbs loves when I wear thongs…but I don’t exclusively wear them and I also do not own a single pair of grannie panties. Grannie panties are briefs for women. There are a whole range of other cuts that are not grannie panties. So if you’re a man who walks around saying there’s thongs and there’s granny panties…please crack the spine of a victoria’s secret catalogue and educate yourself.

Finishing up the show Ellis and Tully play a game with the guys of the green room- Will, Jetta, Cumtard, and HotDog, which is kind of a spin on 3 truths and a lie. Basically, a true statement is read from a sheet of paper and Ellis and Tully have 3 questions each to ask whichever of the Green Roomers they like to help figure out which of them the statement applies to. All four of the Green Roomers have to answer as though the statement applies to them and Ellis and Tully have to try and figure out which person the statement is about. I don’t know if there was an overall winner of this game between Ellis and Tully, but in my opinion, HotDog owned this game. Not only did we learn some things about him, but he completely managed to bamboozle Ellis to the point where Ellis thought everything was about HotDog but nothing was about HotDog and it was funny. HotDog walked away with a new catch phrase- ‘Loved It’, and Ellis learned a lot about Jetta. Here is what we learned during that game:
HotDog: threw a kid off of the jungle gym and broke his arm while trying to get to the slide, was suspended from school for mooning classes during finals, used to eat detention slips in front of the principal, and had his older brother Joey wipe his ass for years after he was potty trained
Cumtard: had a psychiatrist as a child who constantly asked him how often he masturbated and if he wanted to wrestle and when he finally admitted to masturbating- his DR. asked him if he ate it, was the Nephew in Law of Matthew Broderick, and saw ‘Look Who’s Talking’ 7 times in the theater because he was in love with Kirstie Allie.
Jetta: was barred from 8th grade graduation after being caught stealing a carnival prize by an undercover cop, took a cocktail of anti-anxiety meds before sneaking into a music festival, and played World of Warcraft for 3 years.
Will: Voiced a DJ in an x-rated video game called Bone Town.

After that there were final calls that weren’t very earth shattering, but the final final caller, or the ‘Don’t Die-er’ told a quick anecdote about how while he and his wife were trying to conceive their Doctor advised them to go to a sperm bank (which i’m guessing is for in-vitro) and when he and his wife went, his ex- whom his wife absolutely despised- was the technician there to accept his sample, so he had to jerk off into a cup and hand it to his ex, and have his wife be mad at him for something that he could not possibly control. Women…am i right?

Things we learned on TJES today:

Devin fractured her finger at Catalina

Ellis filmed a testimonial for Speed Weed last night and got paid in free weed

Tully likes going to shitty liquor stores

Old Man Sweat is cold because they’re basically half dead

It took $20 grand for Ellismania 3 to get green lit by The Hard Rock

Ellis ordered Skateboard stuff today and couldn’t remember what he needed

Coonan MaGrubey gets turned on by the scent of fear

Neverland Ranch is for sale

Jim Morrissey may have tried to have the head of his fan site killed

Visit to make sure the charity you give your money to actually does charitable things with your money

The Waltz was one of the hardest dances for Amy Purdy on DWTS because it involves a lot of ankle movement and she doesn’t have those

Amy Purdy is the founder of the Non-Profit Adaptive Active Sports

When Oprah called Amy Purdy she sing-songed “It’s Oprah”

Tiger is scared of being in the studio when he should be scared of being in the Green Room

The Flintstones are evil if you are religious

Ellis looked into HotDog’s soul and saw his ass

Dropping a penny off a building won’t kill a person, but a marble probably will

Katie is in the club and can’t get out cause she wiped Tiger’s butt

Tully’s son’s bff at daycare says goodbye to him, gives him a hi-five, and kisses him on the mouth

It’s a brave new world



That’s all I have for you folks!!! Except for that it’s after midnight and officially BroBro’s Birthday!!!!! Happy 31st you old man!!!!! I love you to itty bits!!!

Show Recap for Thursday 7/24/2014

Welcome to the Thursday recap of The Jason Ellis Show hosted by your favorite sexual degenerate- Jason Ellis. But, wait, is Ellis really a sexual degenerate? He’s starting to not like the whole degenerate part of the sexual degenerate thing because it would be cooler if he were called an irresponsible sex machine. But, no, he’s very responsible with his penis. Tully then points out that Ellis has a buncha new cuts on his arm for a sexual non-degenerate and he things Brian Callen from The Fighter and The Kid would take a blood load in the mouth from Ellis because that guy is seriously into Ellis’ sex life. Like, really really into it. And if he really is feeling frisky and wants to catch a blood load in the mouth from Big Daddy J then he should head to Palm Springs this weekend with Ellis and Katie cause they don’t have the kids and planned a nice weekend in Palm Springs with various sexcapades that would probably explode Brian Callen’s mind. Ellis mentions that there was a shit ton of traffic in LA this morning which everyone was blaming on the President, and Tully was only aware that there was traffic around LA because of all the people around him complaining about it while he was magically missing all of it because he is Tully and he knows al of the right turns to make. What he didn’t miss this morning was the jackass who rolled through a stop sign while he was texting on his phone and almost hit His car which held both him and his Little Dude as well as a roaming homeless man and his shopping cart with various hanging bags. And that would have sucked. Out of the three it would have sucked the most for the Little Dude, with Tully coming up second, and the homeless guy bringing it up in last place because, let’s face it- he’s homeless and babies and radio co-hosts rate way higher than homeless people. It’s funny cause when Tully and Ellis we’re talking about it it didn’t seem so bad, but typing out that sentence just made me feel like a terrible human being. Tully then asks Ellis if he didn’t have the radio show and the kids if he would move out of LA to a place like Temeculah and Ellis is super pumped on that idea. He would love to live somewhere a little more out of the wa where he could have a Moto track in his backyard and a really cool pool with a waterfall, but Tully would rather stay in LA because he likes living in a  big city where 50% of the water gets brought in from other cities and states for the purpose of watering the grass that would never otherwise grow there.

Ellis then brings up that people on Instagram are getting down on him for talking about his new straight razor and are trying to say that he is only talking about it and pumped on it because he got it for free and he’s a sell out. Well, guess what, you’re wrong you hating motherfuckers because Ellis is only ever going to talk about the shit that he’s into regardless if wether or not it gets sent to him or he buys it so you can all go right ahead and shut the fuck up and choke on your own dicks, you wankers. All the real fans of the show know that the only time Ellis will really sell out is if it’s for an Energy Drink sponsor. Hahahaha. At this point Jetta comes into the studio and Ellis asks him what’s wrong to which Jetta replies, “nothing’s wrong. I’m fine.” Which we all know to be the evil female answer equivalent of ‘I am so not fine and everything is wrong, but if you don’t really know why I’m not fine then I hate you and I’m certainly not telling you’ so Ellis and Tully grill him for a bit and it turns out than other than being a little tired and possibly kind of high he really is just ‘doing fine’. He also really loves his pet mouse who he gives kisses to, he can’t cook, doesn’t have any live plants and thinks camping is awesome. Jetta gets jettisoned back to the green room after being told that he should try snorting meth and Tully comes out with a story about how when he was just a young thing hanging out with The Backbone he accidentally snorted meth because he and his friends were trying to buy cocaine. About a half an hour after snorting the meth is when they got suspicious since he and his buddies weren’t feeling like they wanted more coke, so instead they decided to smoke it, and Cullen wound up going to sleep behind the couch after seeing smurfs. Lesson- you will know in a jiff if meth is good for you or not.

Insane Clown Posse and Kid Rock are in the news as Kid Rock is being subpoenaed for a glass dildo he received from ICP. But the real story here is that apparently ICP is all about God lately and they are saying that they tricked all their juggalo followers because they have ALWAYS been all about God. Tully is calling bullshit on the whole thing saying that they are just trying to revamp their image after the FBI classified them as a gang hate group thing, but the ‘haha we love God’ angle makes him love them again. In other non famous people related news a drunk guy in Florida got all road rage-y and ran himself over with his own car….cause Florida is awesome. Also, around this time there was a girl caller who was a Cam Girl named Eva_BlissXxX who liked putting hot sauce in her asshole and Ellis got all excited over her and I began to roll my eyes because she sounded like a complete moron or Jillian from Family Guy and I felt bad about being a female for the first time ever in my TJES listening experience. She popped back up a couple times throughout the show and it literally made me want to turn the show off..that’s how bad this bitch got to me. Whatevs.

Back from the first break Justin the Barber is in the studio to give Hotdog the Intern a shave and a haircut cause Hotdog is going places in life and he needs to start looking up to the job. Everyone loves Hotdog, because he is the Hotdog and he is awesome and has a giant horsecock and is in to ass and shit play and he’s gonn start banging pornstars, so Ellis has decided that he needs a beard trim, a side part, and some collared shirts to help him along his way. While Hotdog is being worked on Tully shares with us some Hollywood News involving Paul Hogan (I was in love with Crocodile Dundee as a child) and how after divorcing from his wife he is going to pay her a lump sum of $5.775 million. But that’s okay because Paul Hogan is probably pretty set, and if he isn’t then he can always go back to Australia and bring back the Paul Hogan Comedy Hour because that was the funniest show ever in Australia. Robert Downey JR is the highest paid actor in Hollywood for the second year in a row even though he didn’t make a movie in the past year, with The Rock coming up second officially securing his place as a Hollywood Superstar. Bert Reynolds and Lonnie Anderson are divorced but are going back to court because Reynolds has owed Anderson $230 thousand fe the past 20 years…Red Dragons motherfucker.

Back from the break Hotdogs’s look is revealed and he looks really good, so good that he has gained Tully’s respect as a human being. The picture of the reveal is on Jetta’s Instagram @radiojetta if you wanna see for yourself the hot hunka Hotdog that Justin the Barber turned out. Next on the chopping block for a new ‘do is Wilson Pendarvis whom Ellis forbids to have another faux hawk with there then being a fight I’ve wether or not Will currently rocks a faux hawk or not. Tully chimes in on the subject and it is included that Will has a faux hawk that he is in deep denial about and he proceeds to have Justin give him another spikey faux hawk thing that Wull claims is not a faux hawk.

Time for that segment that we all know and love to hate- Unsigned Bands!!! I don’t actually hate the segment, that was just a line…but for the most part I’m never really left wondering, “why oh why has a label not jumped all over those various bands?” If you catch my drift. For this gi around Tully decided to separate and okay the bands according to genre so we were treated to various artists in the genres of Canadian HipHop Reggae, HipHop, Rock/Rap, and good old Rock and Roll. Most of the bands were atrocious, one of the HipHop songs wasn’t too bad until the guy ruined it by opening his mouth, and one of the rock bands was a straight up rip off of Slipknot and the guys were pretty sold on the fact that even Corey Taylor can’t get away with ripping off that sound these days. The winner of a week of air play on Faction during the show was a band called Rulers of the Night with a song called Skuzz and I’m pretty sure they only lyrics were ‘Fuck You’ and ‘Skuzz’ cause why the fuck not?

Tully brought up a news story about a four year old and his mom getting kicked out of a donut shop in Connecticut after the four year old asked an overweight lady if she was pregnant and the world had officially taken things way too far. I mean, seriously? Even the fat lady was alright with the kid asking her if she were pregnant!!! Ellis is right, kids call them like they see them and he saw a lady he thought was pregnant and he asked about it. He’s four. It wasn’t malicious. Get over yourself donut shop manager, you are taking it too far. Ellis talked about how he picked Tiger up from camp and the other little kids there startedtaljing to him about his tattoos and were thoroughly impressed that the big knot in the back of his head was a result of him cracking his skull. He really liked that the kids were cool with him and he was cool with the kids and if inly adults could be as open minded as kids. We were all kids once, right? Well..I don’t know if Will was ever one..he seems like the kind of person who has bee a grown up sincere popped out of his mom.

Wrapping up the show Ellis decides that Tyler Posey is no longer in the band and takes up the reigns of the keytar himself and makes some cool sounds before deciding that they would be Erin better off with a hot chick as the keytarist. There’s also a lot of talk about the  new channel and the possible names for a new channel, even though a couple of minutes into it Ellis says it already has a name and no other name has come along so great that he has thought of changing it. They take calls and read tweets for show ideas and it seems like Cumtard may really get a show where he and a bunch of other gross dudes fart and shit in each other’s faces a lot and I listen to it and lose ten pounds in ten minutes from projectile vomiting. Dingo may have a den, Tully may play some sweet Hair Metal, and maybe we’ll get a Rude Awakening with Rude Jude morning show!!!!!


thats all I got folks!!! Have a great weekend!!!!

Show Re-Cap For Friday 6/20/2014

Today is a great day because Ellis punched and kicked someone on the head and that someone wasn’t me. Ellis is up to two shits a day, which we learned last Friday that taking two to three dumps a day is very healthy. Tully is still making one poopie a day but he thinks that he will soon be up to two steamers. Speaking of cutting turds, Tully thinks that nasty greasy foods makes you drop logs more but it’s not as good of a cable as healthy food makes. Enough talk of brown bombers and corn backed brown snakes and on to other stuff. Tully got a waterproof iPod for Father’s Day so now he can rock out to Poison and Cinderella as he trains himself into a lean mean scotch drinking fighting machine! Ellis was on Drew On Call last night and got to meet Latoya Jackson. Some people thought thisdownload (8) was a big deal but all I really know of her (aside from being Michael’s sister) was her disturbing playboy spread that looked like her brother but with tits. They talked about people who freak out around celebrities and how Ellis and Tully have never done that. I’ve never done that either and don’t think I ever will unless I meet Elvis or Dimebag and that’s just cuz they’d be fucking ghosts. On a side note, James Stewart has been suspended because he failed a drug test for amphetamines. He says it’s a prescription for a long term condition. I’m not going to speculate but that must be one serious cold! And on another side note, I’m not really sure I know how to use side notes properly but who really gives a fuck. A retired cop bought a piece of shit house in Portugal and found 35 million worth of cars in the barn. Shout out to his ass for being one lucky son of a bitch. The Huntington Beach Bad Boy called in claiming he’s in the best shape of his life, all 20 years of it, and wants to take on Jetta at EM10. I think this fight would mostly be hair pulling and bitch slaps.

Hollywood News, Harrison Ford has upgraded his broken ankle to a broken leg. At this rate I estimate that he will be dead by next Friday so say your goodbyes now. Motle Crüe has indoor football team now, KISS is so fucked! Leonardo Dicaprio called the White House because he really needed his passport so he can drain his balls into a plethora of Brazilian women. Tracy Morgan has been upgraded to fair condition. Chelsea Handler has a new talk show on Netflix, and NWA is making a documentary about being bad ass mother linkin-narcfuckers. Mike Shinoda (@mikeshinoda) came in the studio today. Unfortunately I couldn’t hear shit because either my hearing sucks, my headphones are crapping out, or Mike wasn’t on the mic properly. I blame Mike but here’s a list of the words I did manage to hear, Ellis, pills, wedding, hematoma, crutches, Linkin Park, Chester Bennington, shoes, money, Dr Dre, ranch dressing, new record, hunting party, fucked, and when I finally got off the tractor and could hear again I heard Mike listen to Renegade and Hate Bean. But he didn’t just listen to Hate Bean, he helped lay down new tracks as Will’s hype man! After all the excitement Mike talked about Metallica and a scene from a movie where Hitler is yelling about Lou-tallica. He said it is hilarious and I believe him. Mike’s never lied to me before.

Back from the break Tully brought us a video of stampeding ducks but because you can’t see into the radio I found it here for you. Christian brought in the top ten worst cover songs ever! Prepare to be disgusted!

10. Ugly Kid Joe, Cats In The Cradle
9. Limp Bizkit, Faith
8. Megadeth, Anarchy In The UK
7. Big Mountain, Baby I Love Your Way
6. Attack Attack, I Kissed A Girl
5. Avril Lavigne, Imagine
4. Limp Bizkit, Behind Blue Eyes
3. Phish, Gettn’ Jiggy Wit It
2. Duran Duran, 911 Is A Joke

And the final worst cover ever according to the musical genius of Christian James Hand, Big & Rich completely butchering the rock and roll classic, You Shook Me All Night Long. Fuck you Big & Rich, fuck you to hell. Also another craptacular cover is this, Avril going full retard as she try’s to sing Fuel IN FRONT OF METALLICA!!

To close the show they asked the callers what the most embarrassing pussy injury you’ve ever got? One dude dislocated his knee cap falling onto a bunch of girls, Cumtard fucked up his foot from kicking his couch, Christian was recklessly shaving his legs and sliced his sack and it kept healing to his leg, Tracy got her titty stuck in a treadmill, and another dude dislocated his shoulder on a water slide. My worst embarrassing injury was the one time I shattered my pelvis because I let yer mum on top, OH!

Show Recap for Thursday 6/12/2014

Have you ever gone to a hoity toity event and been realllllllly under-dressed compared to everyone else who is in a suit while you wear a hoodie and watched some old guy with Ed Harris mostly no hair haircut jump and dance around with some hot chicks to some song that he really liked and thought he was a dickish moron for a minute but then have a life changing thought and just been like, “Wow, that’s a happy dude. Good for you, happy dude, have a great night?” No? Oddly enough, I have, but that’s another story entirely.

Ellis jumps right into it this afternoon on The Jason Ellis Show, maybe because yesterday he cut out early to go get Doug with High and then go to a breast cancer event like the good, caring guy that loves da boobies like he is. After going to the Breast Cancer event that was probably a Susan G Komen event Ellis feels like he wants to do good things to help fight breast cancer, because it didn’t sit well with him that so many women get it and that in the African American community women who have breast cancer are 70% more likely to die from it. Damn. That’s scary. Tully brings up that he finds it surprising that there are so many women who really aren’t on top of checking their own boobies and making sure that they aren’t getting cancer because women are generally more on top of their health as a whole. Which is generally a true statement and probably attributes to the whole ‘women tend to live longer than men’ thing, but Tully then brings up that he has always taken healthcare for granted because he has almost always had health insurance and he feels like he’s wasting money if there’s something off and he doesn’t get it checked out by a doctor because he’s fucking paying for it anyway. Well, therein lies the rub, cause there are a lot of people who don’t have health insurance and going to the OBGYN when you have no health insurance is fucking expensive. And don’t give me that whole planned parenthood/clinic angle either, because they don’t just give away free healthcare either, they go based on your income and there are plenty of people who have an okay income and no health insurance and that means that you are paying a lot of fucking money for preventative healthcare and then you can’t eat or feed your family. It’s a clusterfuck. Ellis and Tully also bring up that it’s important for all you men out there to pay attention to your bodies and check your boob area (because men get breast cancer too) and their ball sac because…if you aren’t checking your balls for lumps or if you don’t notice a lump on your balls basically as soon as it happens…what the fuck are you doing all day? Seriously?!!!! This is why women should play with their boobs while they masturbate or while they’re having sex…it’s dual purpose happy fun sexy time and making sure you’re all good in the hood. Hell yeah. Ellis used to think it was weird when girls played with their boobies during sex acts, but he’s alright with it now, and Tully has alllllllways thought it was a good thing because he learned all that he needed to know about sex in his formative years from 80s porn and 80s movie fake sex. Personally…I know my boobies are all kinds of good because I’m a big fan of playing with them and touching them. Not just during sex or if i happen to be masturbating. I am known to randomly, throughout the day to stick my hands in my shirt and give them a good caress. Because I am a hot, sexy, bitch. And, yeah, Hubbs has actually had to remind me that people can see me and to try not to do it too much in front of customers because they might get the wrong idea. Oooops. But, also, you’re welcome. And, hey, if you aren’t in the position to do pushups during Half Time on the show, do yourself a favor and feel yourself up and make sure that there are no lumps and bumps where there shouldn’t be.

Quick shoutout to Mike In Canada and his dad, by the way, who had a 22lb mass of cancer removed three days ago and is doing well and the doctors are giving the thumbs up. That’s awesome. That’s some pretty serious shit. 22lbs. That’s bigger than a newborn. That’s like a decent sized 3 month old. Glad all is well Mike in Canada and Dad, and I know I’ll be sending some good vibes your way to ensure a speedy post-surgery recovery, and I’m sure a lot of Ellisfam is going to be good-vibing you guys as well.

Aside from being busy donating money to Breast Cancer research and taking amusing photo booth pictures with his hot girlfriend Katie, yesterday, Ellis was Getting Doug with High. So Doug with High, in fact, that he left the show early to do it. He has a steady 50 minute smoke-fest with Host Doug Benson and fellow guest Sam Tripoli….who does not smoke weed. And they apparently were ripping pretty hard and that made Ellis talk too much and make fun of Sam’s haircut a bit too hard, but Ellis had a good time and that’s what matters. I didn’t watch any of it, but Tully played a clip of when a magician with a googly eye came round to do some magic tricks and it sounded pretty funny. Ellis was able to call bullshit on two of the guys tricks, but didn’t know how the third one worked, so he said that one was ‘pretty good’. He also apparently caught some flack from people for how he approached the fact that the magician guy had a googly eye…because he did it in his very unabashed straight forward manner that we have all come to know and love. But…how else was he supposed to react to it? He would have asked the guy about it anyway, and he was high on top of it, so…why not just go for it? It’s better than him trying to pretend that it didn’t exist. He said that he talked to the guy…whose name started with a G but I managed to not write down, and the guy liked Ellis and they were cool and fuck all the haters who hate Ellis for being the guy that he is. Boom. Sam got progressively more quiet as the show went on and managed to not talk at all past one point, but I kind of remember Doug Benson saying that it happened with more people than you would think when they came on the show, because it all of a sudden hits them that they are smoking weed in front of the cameras and that shit used to be Hella Illegal everywhere, instead of just the mostwheres that it’s illegal now.
Goodtimes. Goodtimes.

Moving right along, there was a quick mention of the fact that Ellismania 10 might be on the East Coast, at which point twitter exploded, but there was much more focus on the fact that TJES will be at Racer’s Edge for another round of Go-Karting on Friday 6/27 and there is something that occurs to me is important about that date that I should probably remember…but I can’t remember and hopefully I remember before the time comes around. Hmmmm…shit….this is going to bother me really bad. But yeah, there is going to be some more go kart action and hopefully this time Tully won’t get a speeding ticket on his way there turning him into a top contender for the Vagisil 2001 race…even though I guess he would kind of have to be in that race anyway, right? There are a bunch of people already signed on to participate in the Ellis-Karting including Moto enthusiast Greg Fitzsimmons, Andy Dick, Dingo, Christian Hand, Frank Kramer (Heidi and Frank), and…schedule permitting- Kenda Perez and her fabulous bouncing boobies. They get drawn back to the subject of boobies because they want to see bouncing boobies in go-karts and possibly give Kenda Perez a free and friendly pseudo professional breast exam, and the only names that really get brought up are Sam Rubin (but Will’s boobs are bigger than his) and the Porn Star Elizabeth Star, but her boobs are killing her already without the added help of bouncing go-karting and potential crashes (not to mention the innocent bystanders who might be taken out as well).

The one thing that Ellis didn’t get to do last night was watch Hockey and see The Rangers beat the fucking Kings. Finally. Don’t tell me that The Kings are the better team, I’ve been a Ranger fan since i was four fucking years old and i am well aware that The Kings are an all-around better team and I know that 98% of the reason The NYR are even in the Stanley Cup Finals is because of King Henrik…but FUCK YEAH! TAKE THAT! BOOM! THAT WHOLE GAME WAS A FUCKING CIRCUS!!! I’m kinda sad that Ellis missed it because it was a very exciting game and I know that he’s trying hard to get on board with Hockey and he’s enjoying it, but there was a lot more scuffling in the game last night and two players even got penalties for said scuffling. I think he would have enjoyed it. There was a lot of talk about how the Rangers prolly won’t come back to win The Cup all during which I was yelling at the radio because I am a Ranger fan and I will go down yelling at the radio because if i don’t believe that the Rangers can make a comeback and beat those fucks out in LA (sorry…really nothing personal) then there is no chance of it happening. I truly believe this. Make fun of me all you want. If i could grow a beard, I would have a beard. Hubbs and I shall be wearing the same jersey’s tomorrow night, and I forbade his dad (who watched the game with us and is therefore now included in all superstitions) tfrom trimming his beard. Boom. Let’s go Rangers. We want The Cup.

What Ellis did manage to watch last night was Magic Mike, because, why the fuck not. It actually came down to ‘Well, it’s on television and it’s not bad enough for me to change the channel so…’. And Ellis really didn’t think it was that bad of a movie, and that turned into a whole shebang that I’m pretty sure most listeners didn’t want to hear. At all. Yeah. I saw the movie when it came out because all the girls are work wanted to drool over PermaDumbface Tatum and I find McConaughey sexy enough to be convinced to go along with them…and it was amazing and horrible all wrapped up into a movie about mostly naked guys. Tully tells Jason that Magic Mike was Channing Tatum’s baby because Channing Tatum used to be a male stripper…and there was lots of talk about strippers and stripping and judging from my twitter feed…basically none of you wanted to hear it. So…I will nutshell it to- It would probably be really bad for there to be a male fan strip contest at Ellismania 10, because…yeah.

Back from the first break it’s time for some MMA news where there’s kicks and punches and arm bars and all sorts of things going on and people taking TRT. Which is the real issue here. The Nevada State Commission of people who make things more difficult for older fighters to fight have made using Testosterone Replacement Therapy an illegal thing in the UFC and that’s eliminated people like Vitor Bellafor unable to fight anymore because it’s not easy to get off TRT when you need it…and you can’t really get that shit unless you need it. Most recently in the news, Chael Sonnen has also been banned for using the TRT (actually for using things to try and get off of TRT). Ellis is kind of behind Sonnen because the fighter is owning up to using the drugs and not contesting the fact that the drugs were found in his system. That’s called taking it like a man, ladies and gentleman. It’s sad that we are having to say goodbye to some MMA greats because of these new rules and because there was nothing written in to the rule that allows the fighters a period of time to get off of the stuff, but there are a bunch of exciting new up an comers in the UFC and MMA that we’ll be able to watch for years to come.

Now for some Hollywood News!!!! Who Cares??? I dunno…but there are people out there who care about things like Halle Barry having to pay her ex $16 Grand in child support/spousal support, so I’ll take the time to mention it. That’s a lot of money, but she’s in the new X-Men movie, so she can probably spare it with the change in her pocket at the end of the day. Either that, or we can look forward to a good decade of Halle Barry and Nicolas Cage movies that are gloriously horrible. In other Hollywood News, Master P has lost custody of 4 of his children to ex wife Sonia Miller. He didn’t show up for a court date related to the child custody case in a misguided attempt to dispute the custody case which he alleges was brought against him due to his ex’s greedy need for money to support her party habits, when in reality, he probably should have tried showing up and exposing the ex for her booze-hound ways. More kids of celebrities in the news are the late Michael Jackson’s progeny Paris, Blanket, and Prince (who may not actually be his children by birth and are more likely babies brought from Russia) who get a yearly allowance based on the worth of Michael Jackson’s Estate (which is only making more and more money since he died) and that allowance has risen from 5 million per child, per year, to 8 MILLION FUCKING DOLLARS PER YEAR, PER CHILD. HOLY FUCKNUTS. I can’t. I just can’t. What do they do with this money…whatever they want, basically, those lucky lucky kids. Damn. Damn. Damn. I can’t talk about this. Can I have an 8 Million Dollar allowance? I mean…even if it’s only a one time allowance? I’m pretty sure I can get some mileage out of that. Sigh. In some other Hollywood news, R. Kelly’s 14 year old child recently came out to the public as Transgender (female to male) and it’s reported that R. Kelly hasn’t spoken to him or doesn’t even know about it. Ellis decides to reserve judgement until it come’s from the horse’s (R Kelly) mouth, and that’s some pretty heavy shit to deal with, especially considering the Hip Hop Scene (I feel soooooo lame saying that for some reason) and their general feelings toward the LBGT community. There is some talk about how Ellis or Tully would cope with a child who comes out as Transgender at such a young age, because once you get into surgery there’s no coming back from that and that’s a pretty drastic undertaking for someone who isn’t a legal adult. But, in the same breath, forcing a child to go through puberty and develop sexual organs that they don’t feel like they should have could be pretty psychologically damaging. That’s pretty tough. I don’t know what I’d do. I’d never try and interfere, I guess, with how my child perceives him or herself, but surgery…man…that’s tough. The only person I know going through the transition is my age (27) and has been living male probably since we were around 18 or 19…but is still in the process of having the surgery. And that’s a lot for him to deal with as an adult…so…being young like that…ugh. Ugh. Life is confusing, guys. And also, Gwyneth Paltrow thinks that water has feelings. Ha. Good thing she’s hot.

Time for Half Time! Push ups and Breast Exams!!! and a break!!!

Back from the break there is some pot news!!! There is now a cannibis oil infused lube that gives woman a sexy kind of high because vag’s have super absorby membranes and HOLY SHIT I JUST REMEMBERED THAT THIS VERY SITE, NO YOU ARE, GOT A SWEET SHOUT OUT FROM TULLY!!!!! All thanks to the Bitpimps, who was conversing with Tully to get a copy of the Jason Ellis Skateboarding Game for the site, which led Tully to register aka THE Holy Trinity of Social Media on the Internet (maybe) and yeah…that shout out happened and I was all #boom and felt cool that the wonderful guys here like me and asked me to write for them and I got all nostalgic over my fifteen minutes of fame one year ago in August where my blog was read on air and the warm fuzzies ensued…and I’m really so happy to be a part of something like this. I get to write, I get to interact, I get to hang out with the cool kids…it’s a pretty sweet deal. Thanks guys!!! Hi Tully, if you’re ever reading this, I want to be your friend and talk about books and writing and shit and be lame and annoying and have nothing to say to you regarding Hair Metal, but plenty about babies and marriage and stuff. *waves frantically like a geek*…where is Chad Mendez? Who is Chad Mendez? What’s going on with Chad Mendez? Chaz Mendez is an MMA fighter in the same camp as TJ who was on either last week or the week before (aka The Guy who one punched his way right past Ellis’ punch pad record) and gets trained by Duane to kick better ass in the Octogan. And…at this point I was only half listening to the show because my kid is home and I didn’t get to spend a lot of time with him last weekend while Hubbs and I were in Jersey so I allowed myself to be super distracted by him and his cute tales of his life since I last saw him (he was asleep by the time we got home Sunday, Monday, and fricking Tuesday :( ) and I’m kind of over the whole  let’s have a fighter on to talk about fighters because I feel like every other show one or two is on and all it really says to me is that Ellis is really itching to get back to training…but the major points I pulled out were that he is slated to fight Jose Aldo, the champ, who has previously knocked him out, but he has been training hard and getting better and Jose Aldo has kind of plateaued, everyone at the camp has known each other for a long time because they mostly came up through wrestling and that’s a pretty small community, their gym is awesome, Ellis is going to go to the gym, he’s fighting Jose Aldo at UFC 176 on August 2nd, and some fat guy tried to fight him in a bar once and Chad slapped him and told him to sit down. He can jump super high, has a girlfriend, didn’t punch the pad, and would not kill Ellis’ parents dressed up as a bear, but maybe as a Cougar.

There was another break and my sirius got a little weird for a minute, and when it popped back in Ellis had mentioned something about Joel and Benji and it took me a minute to figure out what they were talking about, but it had to do with the paparazzi and the private lives of celebrities and TMZ being crazy and paparazzi being sleazy and the whole pedarazzi thing and then the show went out with a don’t die question of ‘If you were 12 years old and had 8 million dollars a year to blow through, what would you do?’. And you know what? A whole lotta callers would want to be Batman. Who the fuck wouldn’t?

Things we learned on TJES today:

Tully is on top of his nuts

Ellis wants to bang an Oil Miner, Crossfit Champ, and Tennis Player

Twitter is 50% fake outrage

It’s fun to fuck with Same Tripoli

McConaughey had to lean back real hard in Magic Mike to make his abs pop

Girls are basically dudes…we’re just better at diguising it

Blanket Jackson should be referred to as Bill from now on

Liz Taylor’s Vergina (Tullyism) has been closed for years

You’d cry too if you were being ‘healed’ by a moron

Petite Mousey Girls are hot


My son just told me that he misses me every second that I’m not around and I had one of those ‘I love you so much I might die’ moments…so I’m gonna go be a mom for a while. Love you ellisfam!!!