Show Re-cap For Monday 7/2/2012

I know what you are all thinking, where is @bitPimps? Why isn’t he doing the re-caps? Let me tell you all something you probably didn’t know, @bitPimps is a Russian Spy. I was surprised also, but apparently he has been caught by the US Government and is being interrogated as we speak. So for the time being I will be bringing you the Jason Ellis Show re-caps. Somebody fucked with the voice altemicationator and allegedly someone is possibly maybe ripping off The Ellis Show. I think that is cute that they think that this chow can be reproduced, you go ahead and try, but know this, we will crush you. The A6K is still having issues, this time with brakes and fire. So instead of going camping with the kids, Ellis and Katie took them to a kid friendly hotel with a big ass awesome pool with slides and shit. Ellis brought fifty for the kids, the sun block not the dog, and Fifty ran off, the dog not the sunblock, but he was found. I’m pretty sure Fifty never wore the fifty because that would be weird to put sunblock on a dog. And then there was talk about the X-Games. It went as so, bla bla bla X-Games, bla bla vert ramp, bla bla bla, Jamie Bestwick, bla bal hahahaha.

Ellis showed Josh his road rash ion his dick that he got from blue balling some girl and he was worried because it hasn’t gone away yet. As expected, the EllisFam came through and recommended some great products to try out for chaffed dick. Some of them were Bag Balm, Gold Bond, Butt Paste, Vagisil, WD-40, bacon grease. Come to think of it, only a few people were helpful, the rest have some really odd masturbation habits. It seems the Gold Bond worked best for Ellis, nothin better than a little powder on your hang low. Pitbull, the rapper not the dog, is going to the Walmart with the highest number of “likes” and currently the location in Kodiak Alaska is winning, so lets keep a good thing going.

Doing Things With Rawdog made a comeback today, and as always Doc Bangar didn’t fail to amaze. He was asked things like “What do you do in a power outage?” “How do you toss a salad?” “How do you light a barbeque?” and so on and so forth. The answers that were given were those that only a six year old could think up, given example, “How do you clean a catfish?” and his answer, “Why do you have to clean them? They’re already in water.” Go ahead, read that again. Its truly amazing. The Hardluck Kings made a custom guitar for Tully with the Wolfknives logo on it. And then there were final calls. The final calls were actually good, not the usual disappointment that we have come to expect, yer mum however, is the exact disappointment that we expect from a street walking STD wagon, OH!

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  1. Pingback: Best of Re-Cap for Thursday 3/21/2013 | No You Are

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